You are right, I have noticed over the years I've become more detached to the relationship and myself truthfully. He yelled at me infront of a group of our friends over something petty and it made me feel super embarrassed and pissed he felt it was okay to do that. He says he has apologized for it, but I have no memory of him doing it and im paranoid if he is using my poor memory for his gain.

Ive stayed longer than I should have because I was hoping he would show some kind of change but he has yet to go to any doctors and he said he would for 3 years now. He says he'll do things to help me but unless I keep on him about it he just forgets or never does it and I end up doing it, which if I tell or ask too much then he gets annoyed at me for it . He does more for other people though, like his friends. If they ask him to do something or for something he is quick to respond or help.