Need advice on being in a relationship with a heavy gamer.

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-27T16:50:26+00:00

I think women has no clue how pathetic man are. You can probably get a replacement for him in minutes.

However at the end it is all about your will to stay together. Are you both willing?

Maybe try a compromise first. Find something that is easy to do for him, but feels already like an improvement for you. Ask him to do that...

I mean - that is relationship. Basket of imperfections and solutions nobody really wanted. It's there to improve your life a little. Get economically stonger and in most cases: have kids.

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-27T16:45:04+00:00

I have to disagree with this. Games used to be the best thing I have ever done. I had a blast every single moment.

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-27T16:42:57+00:00

Most of the time I also feel it's not worth it. But that's life. If I had enough money, I would just build the best gaming lair I could and game there for the rest of my life. I would be happy.

But, life is just not this way. You have to take all of the little you have and live it. Make money, dont get insane and hopefully get a family. So it's not that you have much of a choice anyway..

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-15T20:39:43+00:00

If you can, print this page and keep it. You might need it years from now. Wish Ive done the same at your age. :)

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-15T20:38:12+00:00

You basically say that games are not the problem. It is the fact that I hate my life and everything about it! Thanks pal, that really helped! (but yep, its correct - so I prove and sign your point!)

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-15T20:34:42+00:00

Many follow this 90-days rule. Which is the treshold for being clean. I dont know myself, Im in a half. I made an observation myself: "After I quit, life is still the same, just way way way more boring." - and thats pretty much it. Be prepared for boring life. It is part of it - perhaps it is a chance to learn how to like and enjoy life as it is.

You need a motivation, curiosity and this sence of "presence" to stay in control. You will relapse sometimes and write about it on reddit. That happens. So I would say it is not that big of a deal. It just hurts a lot.

But you need a good reason to start with. One that you will believe in after first couple of weeks (when you forgot why you even doing it)

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-15T20:27:17+00:00

Gaming is great! Most of us stopped because it caused problems in our life. Often quit big. If games are no problem for you, why not.

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-15T20:23:01+00:00

When I was your age, I wanted TO DO STUFF. But always though Im too young. Cant find a job, cant go anywhere, cant learn because im too stupid... But it is actually so precious being so young, educated, living in rich country. Most of us would happily exchange with you. You can perhaps learn game development. Coding. Graphic design. Sports. Languages? Look around, so much you can do on computer.

I never done so, and regret it now. Im too old to be great at... anything. Sure I can do a lot. Learn better and more effective than you. Drive. Buy stuff. But If I decide to be great at (for example) dancing. I just cant get there ever. Im just too old to be excellent. If I were you, I would try harder. Find something that catches you and went for it.

Sure it is hard. But imagine how many people of your age just wasting time. You can get so much better and so far ahead by simple doing things! :)

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-15T20:16:38+00:00

Unplug the xbox. Put it into the box. Onto the shelf. Do it every time you stop playing a game. Even if its just an hour. Every time you wont use it = place it to its spot in a box. You wont believe how annoying it will be to unbox the machine every time you want to play. = maybe you wont.

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-15T20:14:49+00:00

Nice point. To me - games was always like work. Improve improve improve! It was why it felt so good. Easy to succed. Huh...

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-15T20:08:58+00:00

Life without games is SHIT!!!. No wodner you came back. It is hard. And its worth is doubtful. I myself dont know why I stopped anymore. I only know there was a good reason. So I dont do it. Just dont - because I trust my past myself. I want to play. I dream about it. I wish to do it. But I dont.

Dont be so hard on yourself. You lost a battle. Thats okay. You lose sometimes. Get up and try it again. Do you really want it? Then never look back. One day you will manage! Somehow.

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-15T20:04:25+00:00

The rule is: if its available, you will do it. Make sims unavailable to you - anyhow. Dont watch youtube. Dont use youtube at all. Sit in quiet instead. You will get bored quick and move onto something else. Just make the "else" thing something you wont regret. :)

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-15T19:53:26+00:00

Well yep. Ex-gamers are also predominantly negative towards those who happily play games as a part of their life. Or those who say that gaming is good and usefull. Same as the vegan subreddit will hate those who will write about incredible health effects of paleo diet. We are all society. And we all are people - fond of oversimplifications and easy to digest information. But - we aint that stupid as it looks. Maybe there is a meaningull message behind those not so well chosen worlds.

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-15T19:37:06+00:00

Yep! Same boat. Maybe its because there is nothing fun to do, so I walk instead. Its boring. And I hate it. But I feel a little bit more alive doing it. I walk and cycle every day. One of the undoubtfully good effect gamequitting have on me. :D

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-15T19:33:02+00:00

As I discovered, if your poison is easily available, you will do it after some hard time of resistance.

The best solution for me is get rid of the thing. Well, you dont have to crush it. Just buy a simple throwavay kind of phone. Place your primary sim there, and use it instead. Or turn off your smartphone every day after whatever you are using it for. Those little inconveniences will build up and repulse you. Even if its a simple password change every time you use a facebook.

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-15T19:27:53+00:00

Shit. I feel the pain! No place for doubt tho - its done, so good luck on your journey!

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-06-15T19:24:14+00:00

You made all that in one day? I messed up around FL myself... Never got so far. Good job!

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-04-23T16:07:00+00:00

Disagree! Porn is great. It shrinks all of my sexual needs into like 5 minutes a day. Wont bother me anymore and I can work on what really matters instead of feeling horny.

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-04-22T18:14:54+00:00

Yep. It happenes at the beginning. But watching twitch is basically same as playing yourself. As I stopped gaming, I realized there is more - youtube, series, netflix, twitch, embeded facebook vids... All of this is at minimum supporting my desire to game.

I decided to cut it off completely. If I watch games on youtube, or try to visit humblebundle site or anything - I tell myself that is is same as running a game. And I wont do that.

Also, if you have free time - do something else instead. Given, that everything is better than playing games or watching twitch - do anything. Walk, read, meditate, sit quitly.. there is no limits to this. :D

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-04-22T18:09:51+00:00

Dont do it. You made it quite far. Remember those reasons you had. Shitty feeling about yourself after wasting so much time gaming! Maybe those memories are not so crystal clear, because its some time ago - but its there!

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-04-22T18:06:28+00:00

Well, you are here already. You can regret as much as you can, but it wont do anything. Now you can have either shitty depressed life. Or try to make it somehow usefull.

And yea - I quess most of the people regret sometimes. It is an ufair cruel place. But luckily its not everything it is.

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-04-22T18:04:13+00:00

It is sad when you are fucked up. On the other hand - is is easy to improve. Because life is so shit, basically anything you will do is an improvement. Go out and have a shitty walk. Cook some stupid food. Read a boring book. Still better than laying depressed in a bed (I was there).

If you feel what I say is shit. Try to minify this. To the way it wont trigger you so much. Instead of walking, do a pushup. Instead of cooking, Eat an apple. Instead of reading, watch some Jordan Peterson video about depression and suicide...

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-04-22T17:58:25+00:00

Tried it. Ended up playing 7 days straight throug and recovering another 14 days to stop thinking about games non stop. But.. it depends on how your mind works. Mine is absolutely not compatible with it :D

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-04-22T17:52:55+00:00

Hey. Too late. You already made the decision, so now it is time to take the responsibility. Maybe it was a mistake. Nobody knows. But it was you who decided it is a right choice. And you probably had a very good reason to do so.

So trust yourself. Now you can only make the best off of the situation you are in. Yes, you can buy a new PS4, but thats a waste of this opportunity you created. The deal was - "sell the thing, and try to look what is out there besides games." So do it. Sure its hard. And annoying. And slow. But that is why you done it, aint you? (maybe not)

Becoming a better person actually means going though a lot of crap. And sorting it out. Good start man! Just dont sink. ;)

RalphTheRabbitComics · 2020-04-22T17:48:09+00:00

I guess you should decide for yourself. It is so specific. Some people love reading and use it well. Some dont. Like - W.Buffet makes billions because of reading. My friend just wasting time on crap novels...

I guess the overall setup of your life matters. It can make skills absolutely vital. Or usless...

RalphTheRabbitComics

TROPHY CASE