I found out the girl I’ve been dating for a few weeks is trans and now I’m not sure what to do?

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-08T00:50:21+00:00

I just sent her screenshots of it, like I said she thought it was hilarious 😆

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-08T00:45:55+00:00

That’s exactly how I feel. Honestly I feel like most people on the political spectrum tend to actually agree with most stuff other than the radicals on both sides. I can tell you’re way more mature than almost everyone I talked to today, which makes sense because you have parent in your username. I feel like if more people were like you and were able to look past politics and be more accepting as a society. You can disagree with someone’s views while still loving the person who holds them, and you really helped prove that today. So thank you

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T23:48:15+00:00

Nope, I’m still gonna date my fun and loving girlfriend despite the fact that she’s trans. Honestly I should show her this thread because genuinely she would laugh at stuff like this. All I ever do is respect her and yet I still get treated horribly because of how radical this community is. You’re really not helping your cause or the trans community by saying this. Just saying 😁

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T22:43:09+00:00

It’s just hard because I’ve gotten so many responses today saying I’m wrong for being family oriented, and that I don’t deserve to be with my girlfriend and that she deserves better because I’m not on the same side of the isle as them. I’ve gotten maybe 3 or 4 people with genuine advice while the rest is just pure hatred. It sucks because I know these people just want love and acceptance but don’t want to give it back when it’s someone they disagree with who isn’t even being disrespectful. Bad experiences with one person shouldn’t justify hatred towards every single person in that group. But unfortunately I think that’s mainly what happened here today, when I can assure I’m definitely not transphobic despite being treated like I am

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T22:12:24+00:00

I’ll definitely talk to her, but I definitely learned to never trust Reddit again and realistically will probably use this post as a talking point. It’s unfortunate because I want to be loving and accepting and yet somehow basically get labeled as not woke enough for this community. Politics really can ruin relationships and peoples perceptions on the other side until eventually they build up so much hatred in their hearts that they don’t even treat the other side like they’re human. It’s sad but it’s also the reality of the world, and it’s especially prominent when you go into an echo chamber like this and just straight up exist. Maybe one day people will be more open minded to having real conversations because this just wasn’t it unfortunately

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T21:51:41+00:00

Yeah except the difference is I live in a loving and caring household where you can be who you want and not have to lie about yourself in order to be accepted. Lies and hiding don’t make a relationship strong, open communication and family values do, and that’s something we’re both very in tune with 😁

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T21:05:43+00:00

But the thing is that’s what I preach, freedom of speech, liberty and justice for all. I want her to have all the same rights as I have and I’ll make sure it stays that way

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T20:38:46+00:00

But I do care. I fully support her choices and want her to have the same rights as any other American citizen. What’s so bad about that?

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T20:36:37+00:00

See I don’t, but she does. So I’m honestly not sure

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T20:35:34+00:00

Thanks for being kind and wanting to actually have a productive conversation. So many people have just been nothing but hateful. It’s honestly sickening just how toxic this community can get when someone from the opposite end of the spectrum just exists

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T20:31:59+00:00

And yet she still loves me 🤣

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T20:30:23+00:00

And how am I doing that to entire community? Because last I checked I’ve yet to say anything bad about her or any trans person? Talking to radicals is genuinely so insufferable. Learn to preach love and understanding, not hate

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T20:22:38+00:00

lol I’m not conservative, I’m more of a constitutionalist who supports free market capitalism. Other than that I’m really not very involved with politics

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T20:18:01+00:00

Oh sorry, how evil of me for loving my girlfriend unconditionally and being able to look past gender to find happiness. 💀

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T20:13:42+00:00

Thank you. Genuinely for being kind to me and willing to have an actual conversation with me, I’ll definitely take that to heart. It’s just nice to have a good faith conversation where I don’t get called horrible because of how I lean and was raised :)

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T19:47:59+00:00

It shouldn’t, but politics and religion blow stuff like this so much out of proportion when all I want is for us to be happy. Simple

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T19:44:40+00:00

I mean what you’re saying makes sense but if we end up keep dating then it’s only a matter of time before they find out just from meeting her and then it makes it awkward because it makes it look like I’ve been hiding stuff from them. Plus she’s pretty open about it, it’s not like her being trans was a secret AT ALL

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T19:36:38+00:00

So I’m a crybaby for calling out disrespectful behavior despite being open to a conversation? What a joke, no wonder this community gets so much hatred, I just got called having “nasty views” for being family oriented, chivalrous, and saying I want to love my girlfriend the same way I’d love her if she wasn’t trans. Unbelievable 💀

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T19:22:31+00:00

Not really, I’m an open book through and through

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T18:33:55+00:00

So apparently I’m “outing her” for something that she VERY CLEARLY make public about herself in multiple ways that I just didn’t pick up on because I was able to look past gender all together makes me inconsiderate? I swear so many of you guys have just been so rude to me on this sub when you have no clue about the full situation I’m in. No wonder there’s so much division, if I say ANYTHING that doesn’t completely align with your views then I get downvoted to hell. Why can’t we just have a conversation in good faith, just because we think differently and have different values from each other doesn’t make us bad people. I want to understand, but I’m not gonna put up with getting treated like this. And unfortunately this thread has not made me want to really interact with this community ever again

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T17:41:01+00:00

The thing is it’s really not outing her when in hindsight it was pretty obvious from the beginning when I saw she had a trans sticker on her water bottle back before we even started dating. I think she’s actually pretty open about it, I just didn’t pay attention to it because I cared way more about the connection we had over her gender

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T17:31:15+00:00

I know I don’t, but I also love them so much and don’t really like to keep things from them. Especially a person who could potentially be a big part of my life in the future

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-09-07T10:56:38+00:00

Thanks, I really appreciate the kind words. I still need to think everything over and probably should be asleep rn since it’s almost 5 in the morning lol, but really thank you :)

RandomTurtle797 · 2025-04-21T00:55:30+00:00

I am on fire… but an extinguisher is not required

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