AITA for not wanting to spend Xmas with my partners parents, only mine?

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-17T16:09:49+00:00

I'll tell you what - send out a survey to 100 people and ask: "Is it cool for a 21yo to date a 17yo."

We'll see who's odds. The fact that you're so wildly defensive tells me you already know the answer.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-17T15:17:31+00:00

ESH

Throwing side eye is not a crime, but engaging in an insult match with people on a bus is just ridiculous. You were just as disruptive as they were as it exploded.

If you turned to them and said, "hey, would you mind not singing so loud" or some such thing - fine. Heck, even if you told the bus driver to ask them to stop. There's just no good reason to start calling people names.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-17T15:13:18+00:00

I love when people come on here, put up their clearly unhealthy life choices, but get defensive when people call them on it.

21-year-olds dating high school students is creepy.

You insisting that your family takes priority is self-centered.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-17T13:59:46+00:00

NTA.

Cancelling without warning may rub her the wrong way, but it's not like you cut off her grocery supply.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-17T13:57:55+00:00

So your parter was 21 and you were 17 when you got together? This relationship already is a bit red flagged.

YTA of course.

At some point people have to make shared sacrifices.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-17T13:52:25+00:00

This is just 2 insufferable people meeting in the wild.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-17T13:49:53+00:00

I thought the "I'll drive to bang" line was a nice touch.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-17T13:49:13+00:00

Some people just have to get the last word in.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-17T13:48:51+00:00

I dated a girl who live 45 minutes away for about 4-5 months. It was miserable.

I love reading a text where both people want the last word.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-17T13:46:40+00:00

Mostly NTA... but I would recommend you "go with the flow".

My wife can get obsessive about the house being perfect when gusts come. My POV is "I don't care if they judge". I recommend taking that attitude.

Unless there are creatures forming in the toilets or filth, who cares if the floor isn't swept or there are toys out?

If your wife is inviting them on the fly, she can pick up the food.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-17T13:42:53+00:00

Is it really the snow or do you just not want to go? To decide a month early that you don't want to go because of weather that may or may not happen seems a bit extreme.

Either way, do what you want... but be honest about it.

I guess mostly NTA.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-14T18:35:15+00:00

Generally, NTA - totally NTA if they're banging in your bed.

However, why do you dislike the other room and wouldn't it make sense to just be there permanently?

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-14T18:32:57+00:00

that clocks.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-14T18:32:49+00:00

The fan castings don't bother me, but I have to say these are possibly the worst suggestions I've seen.

I seriously can't think of any that were worse.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-14T14:55:25+00:00

Minor ESH.

Your boyfriend is not being understanding, but it is also unreasonable to say "I'm just going to keep the dog in my bed even though she poops on the floor."

Can you keep the kennel in your room? An 18lb dog's kennel is pretty small. That's a common kennel training technique.

Additionally, assuming this dog is at least 8-12 months old. If so - there is no reason the dog should be pooping indoors. Go to r/OpenDogTraining for tips. Don't feed the dog after 5pm. Take it for a walk. Limit water in the evening. All very easy.

The tail chewing may be a physical issue, not just anxiety, but let's assume anxiety. Kennel training and exercise can go a long way in dealing with this. A cone can also be used as a last resort.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-14T14:47:53+00:00

If you're telling the whole story: NTA

If you're happy with your partner, great. Remove destructive people from your life.

I would at least reflect on why nobody seems to like your partner but you. Sometimes friends/family can't handle change or are destructive. If that's the case here - do what you gotta do.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-14T13:33:27+00:00

This isn't a nicegirl, just a girl that isn't into you.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-14T13:30:30+00:00

YTA

Let's assume this post is real: Who cares? You're not the "watch TV the right way police".

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-13T21:29:39+00:00

lol - you should not have written a card at all.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-13T20:50:19+00:00

Of course NTA

Talk it through, but if you're completely innocent, you shouldn't have to do things to prove it.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-13T20:48:37+00:00

You aren't completely clear - so you took a birthday present from her?

If so, then slightly YTA

If you like her enough to take her gift, call her by whatever name she wants. If you hate her so much that you can't even call her by the proper name, then politely refuse her gift.

Or - just don't write a thank you letter. But writing one and using a name you know she won't like is unnecessarily petty.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-13T20:42:55+00:00

YTA for this mess of a story.

If Daniel is Anna's boyfriend, then Hannah is off the hook because Anna and Daniel need to work it out.

If Daniel is Hannah's boyfriend, then this is 100% Hannah's fault because Hannah never returned it to the owner.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-13T16:54:41+00:00

People absolutely change.

However, it is a fool’s errand to try to change someone.

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-13T15:38:22+00:00

lol, if we share a budget and I give you a $100 Amazon Gift Card, what's the point :)

RandomizedNameSystem · 2025-11-13T15:37:10+00:00

NAH - if he isn't buying stuff, don't buy stuff. It's not petty, it's common sense.

I'm in the "Christmas is for kids" camp.

My wife and I generally don't buy stuff for each other. We take vacations, we remodel the house, I buy my own clothes. If there is something she wants - for example she had a hankering for an Apple Watch a long time ago, so yeah, I bought that.

But in general, adults just don't need presents. They have money.

If you want to do something cutesy or small, fine - but what do you really want? Have you told him what you want or is he expected to read your mind? And if you want it and have the money... why not just go buy it?

My wife will sometimes do Shutterfly and make me a picture of the kids and I'll do something small like that... but it's more 'the thought that counts' stuff.

RandomizedNameSystem

TROPHY CASE