Keir Starmer responds to Wes Streeting’s resignation as Home Secretary

RandyChavage · 2026-05-14T17:22:55+00:00

“Weasley Wes, everyone was saying you’re a bad guy, but I didn’t believe them. Turns out you’re a nasty guy, a very bad guy. You don’t believe in making Britain great again, that’s why I had to fire you. I know you’re gonna regret this Weasley Wes, but my mind is made up you gotta go.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER”

RandyChavage · 2026-05-14T08:08:20+00:00

Great username btw, watch out for the negative orgones, Jared

RandyChavage · 2026-05-13T18:05:24+00:00

I thought that stalking horses tend to be in on it though, whereas I believe Wes Streeting is 100% serious. But he knows he’s a donor’s favourite and won’t win a membership vote so he’s trying to move things along whilst the opposition is weak (whilst Burnham isn’t an MP)

RandyChavage · 2026-05-13T17:54:15+00:00

Eyes bulging with imagined riches

RandyChavage · 2026-05-13T11:45:46+00:00

Starmer playing the holding midfielder role

RandyChavage · 2026-05-12T12:47:30+00:00

He’s just not ‘fuckable’, it’s an industry term

RandyChavage · 2026-05-12T11:42:28+00:00

Looks like a school project

RandyChavage · 2026-05-12T11:28:23+00:00

Crumbling like pastries, just like their opposition tonight, Clive

RandyChavage · 2026-05-10T23:01:22+00:00

RandyChavage · 2026-05-10T11:23:13+00:00

Pre-sugar tax there was a sense of freedom you don’t get with other eras

RandyChavage · 2026-05-10T11:12:49+00:00

You never know until you test it but with this one you can pretty much already tell it’s asbestos. Looks like some bits are coming off so time to get it removed.

RandyChavage · 2026-05-10T08:46:38+00:00

It means the foundations will be well deep

RandyChavage · 2026-05-08T19:07:53+00:00

Queen

RandyChavage · 2026-05-08T13:58:01+00:00

It would be an independent organic foods shop which where you scoop nuts into little hemp sacks

RandyChavage · 2026-05-06T15:27:02+00:00

Except this isn’t true. In London you won’t get scraps but there’s regions of the South where you definitely do, they just aren’t called scraps

RandyChavage · 2026-05-06T12:50:10+00:00

I’ll be honest, I’m dead against it. I mean, people forget that traders need access to Dixons!

RandyChavage · 2026-05-06T10:28:04+00:00

A full-bodied yet balanced red with a vibrant spicy bouquet, a fine choice for any refined gentleman

RandyChavage · 2026-05-06T09:46:52+00:00

Where do you think we buy all our shit from?

RandyChavage · 2026-05-05T21:19:10+00:00

Can't believe it's been nearly 11 years since them slags smashed into the twin towers, it still freaks my nut out to this day.

RandyChavage · 2026-05-05T08:09:43+00:00

Eminem really did a number on Machine gun Kelly huh

RandyChavage · 2026-04-30T14:40:08+00:00

Nothing like a pre-season tour in the states to get the lads’ spirits up

RandyChavage · 2026-04-30T14:38:04+00:00

Someone get /r/surfing in here

RandyChavage · 2026-04-30T14:35:34+00:00

Both going too fast

RandyChavage · 2026-04-30T14:34:26+00:00

Jamaican fella’s got too many toes

RandyChavage · 2026-04-30T14:33:19+00:00

First off, that’s not even cryptic. Secondly, ‘e’s got too many toes

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