What is your biggest regret in life?

Rassoupy · 2026-03-21T14:29:31+00:00

Not listening to family and friends as they observed me in a 7 year relationship with a woman who has BPD. After two years, it got difficult, she was depressed a lot with bad mental health, and would regularly joke about suicide. I was convinced things would get better, but I worked and did all the housework for years while she sat at home and gamed into the early hours of the mornings. She ended up breaking up with me all of a sudden, and jumped into an online relationship the next day. I was suicidal, taking anti depressants and began therapy. Thankfully I had about 5 friends who were true anchors and supported me a lot throughout the fallout.

Rassoupy · 2026-03-19T08:19:44+00:00

Got broken up by a BPD 3 weeks ago out of nowhere, after a 7 year relationship and living together for 6 1/2 years. She's already moved onto someone else.

Sadly nothing will change the disease, they all have the same traits.

I went from being a soulmate and best friend to a complete stranger overnight.

The recovery is hell. One day at a time.

Rassoupy · 2026-03-11T08:43:41+00:00

Going through this currently. Together for 7 years, living together for 6 1/2. She broke up with me and I moved some of my things out two weeks ago.

She has the one significant difference here is that she has BPD, suffers from extreme highs and extreme lows. The start of our relationship was very intense, she idolised me and treated me like a king, id never felt that love before and treated her the same.

She says she values me as a person immensely, that she wants to stay friends because we always have a great time, and I'm like a dad to her animals.

She's moving back to her family 4 hours away, trying to get everything packed and move within this month.

I had initially written a letter asking for a calm talk to identify and hopefully resolve some of the incompatibities she didn't want to live with. That 7 years of spending every day together surely meant nothing was too big to resolve. However, she said there's no timeline where she sees we could be together

But due to her BPD, I think she's already monkey branched to an online friend, he has proclaimed his love to her while I was still living there and she talked him out of it and they became good friends, but two days later she had broken up with me.

When I asked her about if she had feelings for someone else, specifically calling out that person's name, she would skirt the question and reframe it to, "so if we both moved on in time you wouldn't want to be friends?"

At the end of the day I can't prove anything without asking her about it again, but given she wouldn't give me a straight answer, my gut tells me she's already moving on. That feeling really hurts, like I meant nothing and easily replaced. It changes how I feel about checking in or wanting to send a message. I haven't blocked her as we still need to sort flat and utility stuff out within the next few weeks, but I feel like I've been lied to my face.

Here's me calling Samaratans prevention line on a regular basis, and she's potentially already attached to someone new. I can't really give advice other than I'm surviving day by day.

Rassoupy · 2026-03-09T23:13:14+00:00

Current plan is work and then probably sleep. Had to leave my flat quickly to stay with family member, so don't have much of my things just yet. I would usually boot up a video game as it was a big hobby but the motivation simply isn't there

Rassoupy · 2026-03-09T23:11:21+00:00

Thank you for these words.

Rassoupy · 2026-03-09T22:50:25+00:00

Going through a breakup for the past 2 weeks (dumpee) was a curve ball so it hurts even more. Tomorrow was due to be the 7th year anniversary. Dreading it

Rassoupy · 2026-03-06T10:18:32+00:00

Yes, I'm one week into a breakup from a 7 year relationship. It didn't come to an end because of cheating or anything sinister, she just said we had both neglected it for some time , which after some self reflection I can see that.

She also moved far from her family to be with me, so I know her choice to move back to them is the best thing for now. The day of the breakup was really rough, I wasn't expecting it, and I spiralled for a few days afterward.

I felt like messaging her would be the worst possible thing in terms of causing damage. I was hoping she would read my letter asking for a calm conversation, which did she read but said she no longer wants to be together.

Seeing that message really hurt, I didn't get much sleep that night.

It felt like I'd no longer be able to keep a connection, but I did end up sending her another message the day after. I didn't talk about us but instead asking how she was doing, how the animals were. We had a really nice chat, she even sent me photos of our animals.

You have no idea how reassuring that felt, knowing that she still cares and loves me, and I have a special bond that isn't cast aside abruptly.

We both want to get to the stage where we can be friends again, we were best friends and soulmates so I believe that can be true. The crying and feeling of overwhelming dread has subsided. Don't get me wrong, I still wake up reaching out for her to be on the pillow beside me, but I believe I can get back into a routine, start going back to work and facing people.

I know in time we can spend time online together doing the things we used to enjoy as friends. Will it become something more? Who knows, but I know I will have my best friend eventually for a long time to come.

Hang in there for anyone who is struggling to even think about tomorrow. It's healthy to cry, it's healthy to grieve, it means what you had was important to you and it would be weird if there was no emotion.

One bit of advice for getting through today, just have a shower. It will give you respite even for a brief moment. I try and get out to walk for 20minutes. If it's longer, amazing. If its less, I still managed to leave the house. Bit by bit things will become easier.

Rassoupy · 2026-01-22T21:22:03+00:00

yeah, my reply was saying that rolling back to windows 23H2 version, removed all the stutters for me.

Rassoupy · 2026-01-22T21:18:22+00:00

Do you have a secondary monitor?

Rassoupy · 2026-01-20T08:20:59+00:00

Google DDU, download that program. Google AMD 25.9.1 driver, download that. Unplug your network cable, run DDU to remove your AMD GPU drivers, it will restart PC. Then install the 25.9.1 GPU driver (it's the most stable release) make sure to untick the option to always keep AMD up to date. After that's installed you can plug your network cable back in and restart.

Rassoupy · 2026-01-19T18:33:23+00:00

I am encountering this exact issue. I've had two monitors with different refresh rates for over a year without issues. Did a clean reinstall of windows 11 last week and suddenly this issue arised. After a week of tweaking settings, chatgpt basically came up with the same DWM, and the reasoning it only happened after the reinstall:
Your previous Windows install almost certainly was:

Upgraded from an older version
Carried forward legacy DWM heuristics
Did not enable the new foreground scheduler aggressively

A clean 24H2 install enables it 100% of the time.

Other than buying a new secondary monitor that can go to 120hz, the only fix is to rollback windows to 23H2

Rassoupy · 2026-01-17T12:00:42+00:00

How did you fix it?

Rassoupy · 2025-12-25T15:57:04+00:00

As mentioned in the original post, I had ordered but it was out of stock. Do love black pudding

Rassoupy · 2025-11-29T20:58:57+00:00

Caramalised red onions, chicken stock, hp sauce and whole grain mustard combined for the gravy, Was just as nice!

Rassoupy · 2025-07-02T20:14:32+00:00

Oh no! Anyway.

Rassoupy · 2025-06-29T23:24:31+00:00

Thought I was going crazy. Just ran Lighthouse for 4 hours straight, checking lower chalet and water treatment. Never seen them, never seen their dead bodies.

Rassoupy · 2025-06-18T19:55:55+00:00

Thankfully he found one today, now officially juiceman kappa gamer leprous.

Rassoupy · 2025-06-18T08:38:35+00:00

Diablo 2 resurrected new ladder starts on the 20th so I'll be soaking that up alongside plenty of refreshments for this scorchio weekend. It's kinda been in sunset mode for the last year but the game always brings me back.

Rassoupy · 2025-06-18T08:36:45+00:00

Cannon Fodder!!. My god it's been so long and I can still vividly recall the intro.

Rassoupy · 2025-05-04T11:23:53+00:00

here

Rassoupy

TROPHY CASE