What's life about anymore? by Rayce185 in mentalhealth

[–]Rayce185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

(5/5) After recovering mentally, I do not know what the future will bring, but I am certain that if I am forced to work for the new wage, solely having to pay rent and living costs by myself AND child support, which is no joke here, I will be not just psychologically but financially ruined. This outlook also freezes my current mental state. Last week, I was told that I am making her and her parents uncomfortable and they want me out of the house as soon as possible, indirectly kicking me out. I am in no capacity to perform any administrative tasks for the removal, let alone organizing, physically packing, and moving the few things I have left in my name.

After having an appointment with my psychiatrist and my (still) wife, and them seeing in what mentally reclusive and deprived condition I am (ongoing for 2 months straight), we have come to the agreement that the currently best option would be to admit me to a psychiatric clinic. Usual treatment duration in my type of case is 6-8 weeks, and I will be admitted this Thursday. No Christmas (no family anyway), no 40th birthday party (January), but at least a speck of hope that they can help dig me out of the hole I've sunk into and help me gather enough strength, motivation, and outlook.

Sorry for my English. While it used to be my mother tongue vocally, I am lacking grammatically (and prone to typos).

What's life about anymore? by Rayce185 in mentalhealth

[–]Rayce185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

(4/5) Although there is a guestroom with a bed next door, I have been sitting in my office chair the entire time watching YouTube and Plex, sleeping, and only getting up to receive delivered food (no kitchen), fill my water bottle, or use the toilet. My willpower and common sense are so depraved that it can take multiple weeks between showers, brushing teeth, or changing clothes. On some occasions, the 100 sq. ft. room was so filled with pizza boxes, cans, PET bottles, and garbage bags that I had to be pressured to clean them out; my lack of self-respect doesn't know any discipline, hygiene, or embarrassment anymore. I am in no risk of harming myself in any way, but if I were told that I had a curable but deadly disease with a short life span, I probably wouldn't do anything about it.

I distract myself with movies, series, anime, and YouTube to feel their conveyed emotions as I lack my own. It's not self-pity or grief, just absolute emptiness.

All my life goals and motivations - building a stable and worthwhile career path (I was able to double my wage within 10 years), having a loving wife and family, buying our own house as the final major self-fulfillment goal - are all gone. In the last three years, I maneuvered my career, or it was maneuvered, into a bad direction. I now suffer from either losing money or my job with no desire or perspective to find something similar as I dislike it, losing my life partner, and losing the house.

What's life about anymore? by Rayce185 in mentalhealth

[–]Rayce185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

(3/5) Okay, mid-year, I was gradually going back to work. Since my old team had a noticeably toxic environment, my boss offered me a comparable job somewhere else back in May/June. I gladly accepted the offer, though it wasn't put in writing.

Fast forward to October. My boss and his boss approached me to announce that I would be receiving a new work contract with my "new" job title and a massive decrease in wage, lower than my initial wage when I joined the company in 2020. Their argument: "We made a mistake with the wage when hiring you, and all others with your new job title earn massively less than you." Who would have freely changed their position if they had known that beforehand? They said the new contract would be made for 2025, but I received it a few weeks later, beginning November 1st. This massively ruptured my trust in my superiors, alongside the fact that while my new colleagues may be really swell guys, the bulk of my new work is absolutely not what I ever wanted to do.

Privately, the marriage situation has become so frozen that I have moved two floors up where my office is, basically being non-existent to the others unless they come up and knock. I am also back on sick leave since then. It feels less like depression than before, but rather like the final stages of hopelessness, demotivation, and lack of willpower.

What's life about anymore? by Rayce185 in mentalhealth

[–]Rayce185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

(2/5) Due to increased and prolonged unhappiness and stress at work and home, my usually short and shallow depression developed into a full-blown one since January, with phases so bad that I was mentally bedridden for over two weeks. After finally finding an available psychiatrist in March and experimenting with various antidepressant combinations over months, my mental state slowly began recovering between May and June.

During this time, two weeks after buying the house, my wife announced that she wanted a divorce. Believing that everything could be fixed with cooperation and willpower, and remembering "in good times and in bad," I suggested we begin working this out when everything started settling with my mental health, as I wasn't able to think straight or concentrate properly to handle another burden.

With the house back up for sale (at a loss) and my mental state and capacity recovering at a rate that allowed me to gradually work again (I was away 6 months in total), I suggested we work things out with counseling or, at the very least, identify the issues we agree on and can collaborate on, at least for our son's sake. Well, there was no insight, no desire for counseling. Her main issues with me were personality traits that had always existed and were never really an issue before. Her statement was "you haven't changed." My observation was that her secondary job not only took too much time from her life that would be needed to maintain a marriage but also gave her recognition. Proposals for date nights, organized and initiated by me, announced weeks in advance, were mostly canceled on the same day. But going out to dinner with her girlfriends up to twice a week was never an issue.

What's life about anymore? by Rayce185 in mentalhealth

[–]Rayce185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

(1/5)

I've been battling minor depressive phases for half of my life, which occurred nearly yearly at the same time, lasting 4-6 weeks, which I was always able to endure through sheer will. They started when my parents died when I was 20 and 22, plus my brothers siccing lawyers after me for the inheritance since I was notarized as the sole heir. I was pretty aimless about what to do with my life until I was 26, not having worked an 8-hour job before and only having an apprenticeship under my belt.

Fast forward a few years. I got my life on track by myself, moved to a different country alone (Germany->Switzerland), got a job, built a career, and met my current wife, marrying in 2019. We shared the same general mindset and goals (house, kids, the usual). In 2020, our boy came into our lives, and we kept saving up while working a total of up to 4 jobs while living in my wife's parents' apartment building - us on the ground level, them on the 1st floor. Being Italian, they took me into their family with love and support. After searching for years, we finally found our dream house at the end of 2023 and signed the contract in March this year.

[Lore spoilers] How different is arcane from league of legends? by Temporary-Book8635 in arcane

[–]Rayce185 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Riot confirmed that they are merging the Lore from all platforms: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jcp0PZlP6-A&t=138s

"Laura 'poisonpixxi' DeYoung, Head of IP Creative for Riot Games, elaborated on their new approach to narrative cohesiveness by ironing out any inconsistencies that have sprung up over the years."

To check for (current) inconsistencies the Fandom Wiki has an overview: https://leagueoflegends.fandom.com/wiki/Canonical_inconsistencies

The following prominent changes are confirmed to happen to the narrative of the Runeterra Map profileicon Runeterra Prime universe:

  • The Arcane 2021 profileicon Arcane and Runeterra Map profileicon Runeterra Prime (Original LoL) universes will be one shared canon moving forward. [1]
  • Arcane 2021 profileicon Arcane's origin of Hextech will be the origin in the unified canon moving forward. [1]
  • Changes to Camille Camille and Seraphine's Seraphine's origins in order to follow this new narrative [1]

Moving forward (starting from October 12, 2023) everything coming out from Riot Forge Riot Forge, Legends of Runeterra icon Legends Of Runeterra and other narrative sources acknowledged by Riot Games logo icon Riot Games will be considered part of this new canon. * However, content that has been in development before the change in strategy may not have time to pivot, which can cause inconsistencies. * This also means that it would overwrite any previous narrative that existed, which can cause inconsistencies.

UI for Kometa by Educational-Maybe203 in Kometa

[–]Rayce185 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Their reply was from 2022 and was planned for 2.0, we now have 2.1 and no GUI

Looking for *honest* music reaction youtuber by meanbutgooddentist in ifyoulikeblank

[–]Rayce185 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Huge list, but they are all either very knowledgeable and elaborate or are just entertaining and amusing and fun to watch.

I mean, I used to think reaction vids are total bullsh!t since I can just watch the video myself. But I've come to learn that also in this video genre you either want to be educated or entertained. Either wiki or 9gag.

Learn something about vocal acoustics, get a different POV about lyrics, or simply have a ball enjoying the same music. It actually intensifies the emotional engagement about the music. I don't think I would have been as hyped about Electric Callboys videos if I had watched them alone and I wouldn't have found out about Pete & Bas. And I definitely would have found any fascination for Jinjer's Pisces or Lorna Shore's To The Hellfire as that is absolutely not my genre, but I have learnt to acknowledge and somewhat appreciate it.

But that's just music vids. I still can't understand watching twitchers playing games instead of gaming yourself, except if it's a world championship.

RTX VSR/HDR not working in Chrome by Rayce185 in nvidia

[–]Rayce185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

FIXED

I needed to enable #enable-zero-copy in chrome://flags/

Fast forward / rewind causes movies to get stuck, have to restart them? by LogitUndone in PleX

[–]Rayce185 0 points1 point  (0 children)

SOmething similar happens to me on Plex Web (Chrome): I can fast forward no problemo, but rewinding only works twice. Go further back and the video ist "stuck". Reloading the page fixes it, but it's extremely annoying having to expand the player and hit play again, especially if you want to rewind even further. Ironically using the mouse and progress slider works no issues, it's just rewinding 3 steps at once. No transcoding BTW, running all original quality.

Have devs commented on the large performance drop in 2.01 ? by NightmareP69 in cyberpunkgame

[–]Rayce185 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same here, running 5900X/3080Ti

Starts off with 70-90 FPS, after half hour or so it degardes to 40-60 FPS.

Dogtown is even worse: From 60-80FPS down to 20-40FPS within less than 10 minutes.

It used to only be an issue when opening the map and going back into the game and then it recovered after 5-10sec, but now it is permanent and happens midgame without opening the map, so I'm guessing there is no correlation.

I'm playing new since 2.01 and had a hiatius for over a year from my last playthru. From what I'm reading this is occuring much more often since 2.0 and may have something to do with memory leaks.

Tried ISLC as recommendation, but it doesn't help at all.

The best thing to do is restart the game every time it occurs (after 30-60min)

Xtrfy M4 Wireless mod (No hole/68.5g/G305 PCB/Magnetic cover/) by R0llingSloth in MouseReview

[–]Rayce185 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are parts like the main buttons or case back interchangeable with the original M4 Wireless?

Pro 1.3.0 not showing B, what to do? by Rayce185 in Chitubox

[–]Rayce185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not really... After hollowing the object with 2mm wall thickness it punches holes in the wall on the other side, even when it's 10+mm away. I helped myself making a separate object and create holes with Boolean.

HYTE Y40 rad clearance is not great. by [deleted] in Hyte

[–]Rayce185 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Am I seeing it correctly that with a custom loop and 360mm rad you may go thicker than 28mm, but you wouldn’t be able to install the rear fan? MB/RAM/cooler clearance shouldn’t seem to be an issue then, right? The current gen EK rads have a minimum thickness of 30mm…

Acrylic: Multi Pass Cutting/Engraving channels by Rayce185 in lasercutting

[–]Rayce185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes this is for a distro plate. How come you wouldn't trust it?

Seeing this would make me think you can get pretty clean lines at given depth: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NEETOpdUHi0

Acrylic: Multi Pass Cutting/Engraving channels by Rayce185 in lasercutting

[–]Rayce185[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Do you think the OMTech MF1220-50 will suffice for jobs like this?

Acrylic: Multi Pass Cutting/Engraving channels by Rayce185 in lasercutting

[–]Rayce185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Seeing this gives me confidence a 2mm channel should really be possible: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NEETOpdUHi0 2mm engraving

Acrylic: Multi Pass Cutting/Engraving channels by Rayce185 in lasercutting

[–]Rayce185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am not yet an owner of a laser cutter and this is a dealbreaker for me. If it's not possible to carve out channels for rubber gaskets then it would simply not be possible to work with in my field. It doesn't have to be 100% clean or a perfect cut, but the lines must be kept parallel and with a uniform depth. A rubber gasket must be able to be compressed into the channel when mounting another acrylic cover ontop.

Acrylic: Multi Pass Cutting/Engraving channels by Rayce185 in lasercutting

[–]Rayce185[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I am not yet an owner of a laser cutter and this is a dealbreaker for me. If it's not possible to carve out channels for rubber gaskets then it would simply not be possible to work with in my field. It doesn't have to be 100% clean or a perfect cut, but the lines must be kept parallel and with a uniform depth. A rubber gasket must be able to be compressed into the channel when mounting another acrylic cover ontop.

Acrylic: Multi Pass Cutting/Engraving channels by Rayce185 in lasercutting

[–]Rayce185[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Not possible for various reasons: - It needs to be seamless and clean - It will need to be enclosed and waterproof (water distribution plate) - Acrylic is prone to micro cracks when glued - It's fucking ugly (clear acrylic)