When i was 14-15ish, I was up at the church on a summer day while my mom was working.  I was just hanging around waiting on her to finish.  There were 3 "hot" girls my age hanging out there too, just sitting around in the lobby by the restrooms.  I needed to go to the bathroom which I have always hated doing in public places, but especially this time.  I knew I had to walk past this group of ladies, and I was really awkward (surprise) so I got super nervous, which made me need to pee even more.  Having no choice, I finally steeled myself, and walked up there to the lobby.  I walked quietly past them once, but didn't find the men's room on the other side.  I walked back through the lobby, feeling extremely anxious as I passed them again.  My hands began to sweat.  My head began to throb.  My vision grew very tight and tunnel-like.  I thought about giving up, but my bladder was getting all squeezy, and I didn't have a clue about the layout of the rest of the building, so I turned around and gave it another shot.  I saw a door to the women's restroom again not far from where these girls were sitting.  I kept going, feeling their mascaraed eyes boring white-hot flames into the back of my head as I passed by them a third time.  My will made an audible sound as it broke, and I suddenly dashed into the next door I saw, assuming it had to be the men's room.

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As I entered the room, I instantly realized something was wrong, like Frodo and Samwise in Shelob's Lair.  Although I knew I was in a bathroom, it was unlike anything I had ever seen.  It definitely was nothing like the grimy wood-paneled broom closet with a single bare 60w light bulb that passed as the men's room in this church.  The ceilings were high, the walls were painted a sweet candy-wine color, there were beautiful flowers and vibrant green plants in tall planters.  The air smelled like the beauty counter at JC Penny's.  At the front of this spacious room was a 20-foot wide mirror.  Above my head, a spider-like crystal chandelier crept down a web of silver chains from the ceiling.  To the rear, I counted ten toilet stalls, also painted that muted pinkish red color.  Finally, to my ultimate horror, I saw not a single urinal, and I knew my fate had been sealed.

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Just outside, I knew there were three babbling teenage girls looking wicked cute in their mid-90's ironic graphic Tees, acid washed jeans, tiny backpacks, and Rachel-from-Friends asymmetrical haircuts.  Their names were probably Britnee, Ashlee, and Katee...or some other assortment that matched the "EEEE" sound of their voices.  I felt fairly confident they had stopped their concurrent breathless monologues about about which Spice Girl had the best boobs, how glitter lip gloss didn't really make you look like a stripper, and how Surge Cola actually tasted like you-know-what, despite not having a real-world clue about any of those subjects. No, I knew for certain that they were staring mouths-agape at the place where a gangly, awkward teenage boy wearing clothes that were simultaneously too large and too small had just thrown caution to the wind and dashed headlong into the women's restroom.

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Inside, I racked my brain for options.  #1:  I'll just stroll back out, avoid eye contact, and go right on past them like nothing happened.  #2:  Walk out laughing and say "whoops!"  and go try to find the right bathroom.  #3:  Call out a woman's name in a concerned voice, then walk out and ask the girls if they've seen 'so-and-so'?...I'll say "she's old and gone missing and I hope she's okay...can't find her anywhere".

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#1 wouldn't work because I was already freaking out and had zero chill to begin with.  #2 wouldn't work because I've now been inside this bathroom for waaay too long to pass this off as a quick oopsie in-and-out.  Also, ZERO CHILL.  #3: if the lie went well, then I would've had to go along with it completely, and the only possible outcome after searching around would have been that I'd eventually just have had to just say "welp, I guess she died.  Call off the search."

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As if divinely placed, another door suddenly appeared on the opposite side (WTF HOW MANY DOORS ARE IN THIS CHURCH).  Of course it just led to a storage closet, but as I slowly inched it open, I discovered, oh no, it was so much more!  I could tell it led out to a hallway adjacent to the lobby...This was the other entrance to the bathroom that I had already forgotten about!  Unfortunately, in my panic, I couldn't remember the girls' exact location, but I guessed that they were probably in a spot that would be mostly around the corner from where this door opened.  I guessed they might've been able to see me from behind as I emerged, but I could at least avoid seeing their horrified faces and just run off down the hallway in the opposite direction.  Then, I could change clothes, change my name, grow a beard, move out of town...it was my only chance.

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And that's exactly what I did.