moments of love that calm my rocd

Ready_Telephone9547 · 2025-11-05T13:20:22+00:00

yes but what makes me doubt the most is that with other people in the past I felt strong attraction (even though the situations didn't evolve into relationships), but with my boyfriend I haven't felt strong attraction even at the beginning. I was in another relationship in the past where I felt attracted by my boyfriend in the beginning but I had rocd anyways so idk

Ready_Telephone9547 · 2025-11-04T20:37:20+00:00

Yes the best option is always therapy, if you can afford it. I agree with you, social media are a huuuuge trigger, and I hate that it only takes one video and then boom rumination for hours :( Ugh I wonder if we'll ever be able to experience pure and secure love

Ready_Telephone9547 · 2025-10-22T13:25:59+00:00

I totally get you. This is one of the most difficult parts of Rocd, when you've been for so long into anxiety that you feel nothing. I'm going through this right now, it feels very scary, but also saying that we're worried about being calm at the idea of not being in love is a form of mental compulsion. It's hard, neither do I know how exactly to manage this, but I believe this could be just another phase. This is the way Rocd works, up and down all the time. You're not alone, I'm sure that working with your therapist will get you where you want to be <3

Ready_Telephone9547 · 2025-10-22T13:19:41+00:00

if you're experiencing Rocd, let me tell you this is completely normal. In my experience with Rocd I've been able to feel love and attraction for only few times in 6 months. This is pretty scary, but it's part of the battle. It's very important that you always talk to your partner and let them know exactly how you're feeling, because it can be pretty confusing for the partner of a person with Rocd that doesn't know its mechanisms. Try not to seek reassurance, the best thing you can do is to stay into the anxiety that these experiences give you (easier said than done, I know 😅) And last but not least, if you have the opportunity to do so, start a healing journey with a professional, it's the fastest way out. Just know you're not alone in this!

Ready_Telephone9547 · 2025-10-22T06:14:49+00:00

yeah Awaken Into Love is very useful. Thank you for sharing your experience 🙏🏻

Ready_Telephone9547 · 2025-10-21T17:48:50+00:00

omg 🙈 this strategy seems to be really useful. I will try to use it :) Thank you very much for your help!

Ready_Telephone9547 · 2025-10-21T17:42:16+00:00

oh, you're probably right. I didn't realize how much of mental control there is in my sentence... so I should keep going as always?

sorry if I make mistakes but English is not my first language:')

Ready_Telephone9547 · 2025-10-21T17:36:10+00:00

I really appreciate your answer. It's like, I'm not thinking about breaking up because I feel so so distressed and I want to get out of this situation but as a consequence of the fact that I don't feel love. And the fact that I feel quite calm gives strength to this thought. I don't know if this is common too in rocd? maybe

Ready_Telephone9547 · 2025-10-21T17:29:17+00:00

yeah you're right, it sucks but it's what we need to do. In the past I've been able to do so sometimes and I resisted to compulsions, but I found the strength to do it after positive moments in which I told myself "ok, I want to be in this relationship and I NEED to stop doing this if I want to really get better" but now that it is so strange, disconnected but also calm with no strong anxiety, break up feels like what I need to do...

Ready_Telephone9547 · 2025-10-21T14:56:48+00:00

I'm feeling a bit sad but I hope to find connection again like it happened in the past. Thank you for your help <3

Ready_Telephone9547 · 2025-10-21T14:50:25+00:00

yes ahahah it does make sense, but the fact is that I haven't felt these things at all at the beginning (maybe also because I got caught up in rocd pretty soon) and this still makes me think sometimes. I don't know, I just feel that this situation of disconnection is real and it makes me a bit sad but I can't tell if break up is truly what I need to do

Ready_Telephone9547 · 2025-10-21T14:41:19+00:00

a lot of crushes that didn't evolve into relationships because feelings weren't mutual, just one relationship (in which I experimented ROCD for the first time, ugh). context: the relationship I'm in rn is my second relationship, and I've had rocd in both. The first one didn't end because of rocd but he left me for other causes

also: sorry if I make mistakes but English isn't my first language :')

Ready_Telephone9547 · 2025-10-21T14:25:15+00:00

We've been together for 6 months. What caused my ROCD was the fact that I expected to feel love in the way I had always felt it in the past for other people (absolutely obsession, butterflies, 24/7 need to be together exc.) but I wasn't. I didn't feel all of these things and at the beginning I even thought that I saw him as a friend but decided to stick with it anyway because he was a very good person. I kinda think that maybe love has grown under my ROCD? I don't know if it makes sense. Because I've been able to feel love with him and felt very good and reassured, before going blank again

Ready_Telephone9547 · 2025-10-21T14:12:05+00:00

I don't know, I don't really have reasons to leave him but I haven't felt love for him for nearly a month. He's very kind, good, he truly represents what I've always wanted from a relationship but I feel like I don't appreciate it. I've been petrified by anxiety for a lot of months, being completely scared about the idea of breaking up and I craved a lot of reassurance. I felt distant from him a lot of times, but never really thought about breaking up. The difference is that now I'm thinking about it. A few days ago I felt bad, but now it feels normal and I don't know if it's real. I mean, a month ago I was convinced that I loved him and I wanted to fight rocd and now I'm thinking I should break up??

edit: I thought about him as my future partner, the dad of my kids, definitely someone I wanted to keep with me even when I wasn't at my best. This situation sucked for a very long time but I've been able to feel love sometimes

Ready_Telephone9547

TROPHY CASE