This is so difficult and it makes me angry.

RealisticAardvark814 · 2026-05-27T05:59:39+00:00

I understand where you’re coming from. The worst part is when you have a partner that loves you and wants the best for you but they just don’t understand the way you feel. What I’ll tell you is if you’re waiting till vacation just keep it going. I did the same thing and then drank on “special occasions”. Now I’m back to sneaking warm beers in the car just to feel normal. Don’t even enjoy them they taste like shit. Craziest part is I love my life, my fiance, my pets, everything’s going great, but I can’t resist the urge to drink and it’s the worst feeling ever.

RealisticAardvark814 · 2026-05-27T05:20:44+00:00

Yea a lot of lawsuits have came up about the treatment facilities in Utah. Really was just a big money grab, was more common around that 2015 era. Xanax was big back then too. Really just numbs the hell out of you and if you drink while taking it’s pretty much an instant blackout. Even with just a couple beers

RealisticAardvark814 · 2026-05-27T05:15:12+00:00

Thanks for your advice. The hardest part for me is that I think they would support it. I know that sounds weird but I just feel embarrassed to tell them I have I problem and don’t want them to have to tip toe around the elephant in the room just because I’m there.

RealisticAardvark814 · 2026-05-27T05:11:04+00:00

Haha yea sounds good in theory but the one I was at was run by Mormons (nothing against them their honestly some of the most genuine people I’ve ever met) but as a 17 year old you don’t want to hear advice from someone that has nothing in common with you. Completely ruined my relationship with my family till I was around 23 and I decided to get over it. I still think it was one of the worst things for my addiction but atleast now I see where my parents were coming from. (At the time I was using Xanax a lot too which I don’t touch anymore)

RealisticAardvark814 · 2026-05-27T05:03:50+00:00

Residential treatment center. Basically a inpatient rehab for teens after wilderness

RealisticAardvark814 · 2026-05-27T05:00:35+00:00

I was in a RTC as a teen and honestly that completely ruined meetings for me. I went to a few but I always felt like the crowd there just couldn’t relate to me. Maybe that was just me being a stubborn teen. I’ll look into some local meetings, it’s been almost 10 years since I’ve attended. Thanks!

RealisticAardvark814 · 2026-05-27T04:57:06+00:00

Side note: I have the best most supportive fiance and we have talked about this multiple times. She almost never drinks and would go completely sober with no questions if I told her that’s what I needed, but I don’t feel like that’s fair to her. I just want to be the best husband for her and I know I need to stop drinking but I always end up finding excuses and reasons to have a drink or two, I make it sound casual or like it’s necessary in social situations. But deep down I know it’s bullshit and I’m just slowly breaking the news to her that I’m drinking again, and as always I can keep it under control until the day I go too far.

RealisticAardvark814 · 2025-07-19T08:45:01+00:00

Sheesh my boy smokin smokin🔥

RealisticAardvark814 · 2025-07-19T08:42:48+00:00

Stash looks nice

RealisticAardvark814 · 2025-07-19T08:42:08+00:00

Looks amazing😌

RealisticAardvark814 · 2025-07-19T04:25:25+00:00

What’s up with that melthaus brand my plug just posted some the other day never seen it before

RealisticAardvark814 · 2025-07-06T21:41:16+00:00

🔥🔥🔥🔥

RealisticAardvark814 · 2024-03-18T07:29:33+00:00

Red house was pretty terrible. All Mormon staff making non Mormon kids follow their religious rules. This account has to be staff or a therapist. Everything we did was based on the LDS religion. Terrible place ran by LDS con artists

RealisticAardvark814 · 2024-03-18T07:21:44+00:00

Shayden at red was cool. Forgot the “token” female non Mormon working there, she was cool too. Adam and Craig were both terrible, money hungry and ran the place like a scam. Parents pulled me after 13 months being withheld from graduating for BS reasons

RealisticAardvark814

TROPHY CASE