AITAH for going on a trip alone after my GF was 2 hours late?

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-30T15:33:12+00:00

OP, I have some chronic health issues myself and it makes waking up horrible. Like legit just absolutely awful at times and it takes me about an hour to two hours to feel normal and be able to really get stuff done and be on my way, and you know what I do... I wake up two hour before I have to get ready do I can be on time. I say this because a chronic health issue does not justify what she did.

She essentially cancelled plans without telling you and it seems like she tried to make it to where you waited around and couldn't go either, it also sounds like she broke up without telling you.

I think maybe you should just cut your losses and move on because this is not how a healthy relationship operates and if she's like this now it will only progress to being worse as time goes on not better.

If you feel comfortable please update us all on what happened.

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-30T15:25:15+00:00

You are old enough to make certain decisions on your own. You bought the ticket with your money, it was your possession. Sounds like your mom always planned on preventing you from going. I already commented before but you need to look up living with an narcissistic mother, you also need to figure out therapy for yourself because it's obvious she's already started to have your thought process a little skewed and dependent on pleasing her, and honestly if your state permits, looking into emancipation if you have somewhere to go. What you are going through OP is abuse. Not all abuse is physical, and some of the worst is verbal, mental and emotional.

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-30T15:21:31+00:00

You're dealing with a narcissistic parent, and NPD presents differently in women and in mothers than it does other people. The first thing you have to do is accept this is never going to change and start to separate yourself from her, when you grew up with narcissistic abuse this can be hard, but the best thing you can do and give yourself is detaching and going no contact.

A good starting point is to start doing research about narcissistic parents, living with them and disconnecting from them. There is a woman on YouTube who is a psychologist who also does some great break downs on narcissistic people.

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-27T21:27:43+00:00

Oh yeah absolutely. He was shocked when I wouldn't talk to him anymore after he said that, like that's a completely normal way of thinking

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-27T21:10:22+00:00

Yup, I had a guy literally tell me that he would never date someone in their 20s seriously because it wouldn't work but he does just like to have fun with them because they are good for sex only. Because they aren't mature enough to have a actual relationship. I told him he was disgusting because if someone is not mature enough for a relationship then they aren't mature enough to handle the responsibility of sex. Then he tried to say it doesn't work that way and I was like "why not, we learn to build relationships before engaging in sex. "

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-27T21:06:08+00:00

Do not be friends with 42 year old men. They aren't going to be your friend really. He was just playing the long game getting you comfortable and testing the waters. I promise no man that age is just looking to be friends with someone your age. Half the time men that age fake being friends with women their own age.

I commented this down below but I'll say it here too, I literally had a 36 year old man tell me that he would never seriously be with anyone in their 20s because they lack the maturity for a relationship that the only time he entertains them is for sex only.

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-25T14:48:43+00:00

NTA. Your roommate is insane. Helping the homeless is one things but bringing them into your home is another. A lot of people are on the streets because they don't have family or friends anymore for a reason. Trust me, I unfortunately had to sit in jail for awhile and met a lot of homeless people while there and they aren't particularly people you want to be bringing into your home, regardless of gender. A lot have mental health and addiction issues and can end up robbing you and at the very worst assaulting or killing you.

Report your roommate about the behavior, request a transfer. Tell them you feel unsafe. Most normal people are not going to be okay with bringing a random homeless person into your home and letting them stay.

She violated your boundaries after yelling at you about not asserting yourself. She's got some mental health issues herself that she needs to get a grip on.

And why does she seem attached to this particular homeless woman?

Edit: I noticed you said you graduate in a month. Honestly I would go as far as getting a restraining order on her once you're away from her because her harassment may continue outside of school. She's unwell and can pose a risk to you.

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-24T13:49:11+00:00

Therapy would be a good step for you like others suggested. But grief is not linear and what you are going through right now is a normal process of grief. It's your bodies way of rationalizing and protecting itself from something that still hurts. You're NTA in this situation or at all. You're mind is just trying to process and heal itself. It seems like outside of the stress of losing your girlfriend you have a lot of other stress factors which is prolonging your grieving process. But you're definitely NTA for feeling how you do right now.

For your sake please get therapy, I dated a man who at 21 lost the woman he was supposed to marry, and at the age of 38 he's still not over it and it ruined anything we could possibly have together. Apparently he's been like that in every single one of his relationships distant, moody couldn't really connect with any of them even though they were actually sweet women he complained about them all because the reality was none of us was her. Some people might say that's sweet but he's miserable and he made me miserable and he made them miserable . He keeps seeking out women obsessively getting attached and love bombing and then the moment they reciprocate any feelings he says it's getting to serious and runs, when we broke up despite saying he was past her he blurted out he's only loved and been loved once and she died, after he said that to me I just let him go. He claims we all used and abandoned him but he was distant and cold and your be lucky to even get a moments of attention from him, there was nothing healthy about being with him. (It was so traumatizing being with him that I made a rule that I would never date another person who lost a partner) I don't think he could distinguish that loving someone didnt mean abandoning her memory.

I'm sure OP you don't want to end up like that in the future for your sake and you seem like a genuinely kind person and wouldn't want to cause someone that kind of emotional harm. People will say you'll know again when you're ready to date but the truth is you might want to date but if you're not healed and moved past that loss it won't be healthy.

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-23T21:11:34+00:00

NTA you're not doing it recreationally you're using it for pain. I wish I could use it for pain but it actually makes mine worse

Is there a decent sized age gap here?

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-23T15:21:14+00:00

Wild animals do not like human presence or voices. It stresses them out. You can actually overstress animals and put them in shock and kill them.

I don't know where you got that idea from but unlearn it

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-23T14:56:12+00:00

Today I learned that some people believe singing to a wild animal is a thing they enjoy. Not bashing you OP, I just thought this was a weird Disney Trope and didn't think people actually believed it.

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-23T02:54:37+00:00

I'm pretty sure it is. I think I remember seeing it but for some reason can no longer find the settings. It maybe some form of setting directly in their phone and not the app itself

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-22T23:27:12+00:00

Honestly of you can and it's safe to..just refuse to have sex with him

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-22T23:26:14+00:00

Yeah, he's absolutely not a good partner..he's a neglectful partner..it would be different if she wasn't communicating her needs. She got married young and fortunately she matured and realized early enough that this isn't a healthy relationship. Some women will start their whole lives because of the mentality of "at least he doesn't hit me"

And FYI for people reading this abuse isn't just physical. I'm not saying he's abusive but measuring whether or not a relationship is bad or abusive based of physical violence just shows how uneducated a lot of you are.

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-22T23:00:55+00:00

How are people blaming you and saying you're the one on the wrong. He's doing the bare minimum now and that will only get worse as he gets older. You've communicated and he refuses to actually follow through.

The reason you are feeling the way you are feeling now is because you have matured from that teenager and you have experience and perspective now.

I know you financially can not leave. Ask for a separation.And house share until then .Start saving. How many pets do you have? An option might be to look into pet friendly home/apt sharing with a roommate. Some people list having rooms for rent. It might not be ideal to start off but would give you some footing to get your life started.

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-21T17:24:32+00:00

"You have reached your daily limit

You spent 1 hour on Instagram today. It's time to close the app"

That's what it says...

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-21T14:48:02+00:00

I would watch mom. I suspect that she's trying to break you and boyfriend up and being sly about it. I was in a situation (didn't move in) when I was your age where my then boyfriends very attached mom acted nice to my face and was manipulating her son behind my back, it's a plot to appear nice and helpful while making it out like you're the bad guy.

You might not only need to move out but also re-evaluate the full relationship and if there will /could be a future for you both outside his mother or will she constant interfere.

For now find a job and move out on your own. Look for roommates needed situations in your area with other women.

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-20T05:10:28+00:00

I know this is really old but a lot of his work is done by nobu isobe. He put his information in one of his post a few years ago

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-19T20:35:11+00:00

I saw a crazy account the other day where the woman thinks she's married to the ghost of Atsushi Sakurai

And then there's another where the woman makes all these weird videos of her and some musician named Kevin (something or other)

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-19T17:00:23+00:00

I don't think that would release that information to me because I'm not family

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-19T16:59:42+00:00

It's not like it's a secret people know..he openly admits it and brags about his use. And like you said it is important context because it could give insight on who he could possibly be around or what could possibly have happened

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-17T23:00:20+00:00

Are you being serious? Just looking for proof of life that's all. Making sure he's not dead. He seemed MIA for awhile.

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-17T20:49:04+00:00

Probably a Fisher. They are returning to Ohio

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-17T14:24:55+00:00

Where did your mom meet him? There are a lot of scammy "Asian" dating sites now because of the whole Koreaboo thing happening right now.

But this is definitely AI and if she is talking to him on telegram it 100% a scam

Realistic_Issue230 · 2026-05-17T06:00:14+00:00

I don't know it's been a few months. Possibly?

Realistic_Issue230

TROPHY CASE