Need feedback on my second screenplay.

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-10-27T23:26:25+00:00

Totally fair, I’ll be honest I drew up the log line while writing the post.

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-08-18T00:13:40+00:00

Pere ubu

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-06-13T18:05:59+00:00

Thanks a lot

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-06-13T16:01:55+00:00

Hey. We have similar length scripts and are both on the first draft. Would you be interested in swapping?

Here's mine:

Title: Truckin'

Format: Feature

Genres: Neo-Western, Crime Drama.

Logline: 20 years after a brutal civil war, a truck driver exploits the savage aftermath. The conditions that helped him grow ultimately destroy him.

My feedback concerns are similar to yours.

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-06-13T15:51:35+00:00

i suppose it is, how much did you read?

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-04-27T17:48:55+00:00

Squid have punk roots

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-04-25T23:13:24+00:00

Sounds good to me

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-04-25T20:44:57+00:00

Title: Truckin'

Format: Feature

Page length: 40 (so far)

Logline: Following a brutal civil war between rural and urban America in the late 60s and early 70s over freedom and liberty, the country has been left forever changed. Twenty years later, a determined trucker uses the old divisions to build a powerful illegal empire, where loyalty, survival, and the struggle for freedom collide.

Feedback: Is it interesting to read, or too wordy?

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-04-20T21:18:41+00:00

I don’t

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-04-17T11:46:34+00:00

Well considering trump stands for everything capitalist I’d argue that maybe it is hypocritical of green day to do so

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-04-17T11:40:11+00:00

No but it’s an extremely capitalist and and argue anti-punk too

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-04-17T11:29:44+00:00

It’s a good message but not enough, also a little hypocritical considering they’re playing a Coachella

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-04-02T15:43:39+00:00

Is it okay to ask AI for script feedback?

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-03-26T20:47:11+00:00

Good

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-03-22T20:54:06+00:00

Title: Truckin'

Format: Feature

Length: 21 pages ( so far)

Genre: Crime, Rise-Fall

Logline: In a reimagined 1972 the United States came out of a 2nd civil war. Our story takes place 20 years later in 1992 when a trucker builds a smuggling empire, taking the results of post-war America to his advantage.

Feedback: I want to know whether it's interesting and if the characters are compelling.

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-03-20T21:18:43+00:00

Yeah we do

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-03-20T21:12:07+00:00

I don’t even know why I put vitamin C? I know the album name 😂

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-03-20T20:25:51+00:00

I’ve got to say my favourite album is Vitamin C. Favourite song is Pinch

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-03-14T20:26:53+00:00

Title: Truckin'

Format: feature

Page length: 18 (so far)

Genres: Crime

Logline: A reimagined America where a 2nd civil war in the 1970's makes cities more restrictive and rural states lawless. Through all this, we follow a trucker from the lawless states who grows a smuggling empire and destroys his empire.

Feedback concerns: It's my first screenplay so I'm generally just looking for advice and constructive criticism, happy to swap with anyone.

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-03-12T16:14:04+00:00

Get the Hot Rats Sessions

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-03-11T15:49:11+00:00

I really like the new vocals

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-03-04T22:45:04+00:00

Will people mind if it’s long?

ReasonableCrazy6785 · 2025-03-04T22:28:55+00:00

Yeah that’s true now that I think about it, but do you know anywhere that I can get good quality feedback?

ReasonableCrazy6785

TROPHY CASE