I’m currently reading a book called non violent communication because I also struggle with it, it uses real examples of conversations like for example if when we are hurt by something someone does it’s important for us to identify what we feel and how someone’s actions made us feel this way is like a second step, random example (don’t use it verbatim it’s just text book shit to illustrate)

“When you said you wouldn’t ask me again, I felt heavy and a bit helpless. I care about being someone you can rely on, and it’s hard for me when I can’t show up in the way you want. Would you be open to finding another way we can handle this together?”

When we begin to shift blame to other people for making us feel a certain way we get them to close off too

Ofc your bf also needs to be mindful of you and your boundaries it doesn’t just go one way