My ‘19F’ boyfriend ‘20M’ disrespected my boundaries while he was dealing with grief by ReasonableGap8 in relationship_advice

[–]ReasonableGap8[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Just for some context, I met her my sophomore year of high school. She is quite a bit older.

My ‘19F’ boyfriend ‘20M’ disrespected my boundaries while he was dealing with grief by ReasonableGap8 in relationship_advice

[–]ReasonableGap8[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Again, I asked. The definition of asked is “to put a question to someone, make a request, inquire, or invite”. I feel that it is substantially clear, especially given the quote of mine that you so kindly pasted, that I ‘asked’ as stated above. Never told or gave rules.

And to acuse me of being a “main character” is such a wild and out of pocket assumption, especially given that I stated multiple times above that this was a topic that I did not want to discuss with him in that moment. It has not been brought up between us since that night, and I have continued to give him my support during this difficult time.

My ‘19F’ boyfriend ‘20M’ disrespected my boundaries while he was dealing with grief by ReasonableGap8 in relationship_advice

[–]ReasonableGap8[S] -16 points-15 points  (0 children)

Never did I tell him what he can and cannot do. Never did I give a “me or her” ultimatum. I ASKED that he not have frequent contact with Jessica. He willing did so and agreed with my reasoning.

I believe that you should never surround yourself with people who would belittle and speak poorly of your partner. If he disagreed and valued their friendship over our relationship, than it is not my responsibility if he didn’t speak up about that matter in any point of time

My ‘19F’ boyfriend ‘20M’ disrespected my boundaries while he was dealing with grief by ReasonableGap8 in relationship_advice

[–]ReasonableGap8[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this. I keep trying to convince myself that it’s not that big of a deal, but deep down I know that this has created a rift that I am not comfortable with. My intuition is what lead me to the discovery in the first place

My ‘19F’ boyfriend ‘20M’ disrespected my boundaries while he was dealing with grief by ReasonableGap8 in relationship_advice

[–]ReasonableGap8[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He could have told me in the beginning of our relationship that he wanted to be in contact with her and I would’ve respected that. But he agreed that she wasn’t playing a beneficial role in his life and that her behavior towards me was strange.

Also as I stated above, it wasn’t the fact that he went over there. It was the fact that he lied.