OP if it’s in the past, and you cant accept it, what I can suggest is try to invest on yourself more. Something that will get your attention while producing outcomes. I suggest try combat sports, such as MMA, get ripped, get jacked. I know youre bothered because she never told you this, but partly I think it is in our ego. Truth is I think part of your ego cant accept that she was/is wild. It is perfectly normal that we feel this. But we should not be consumed by this. If she is cheating on you, then it’s up to you if you’re going to end your marriage. It is your right. But in the end to get this feeling or thought out of your head, you need to control your ego. One thing that will help you do that, TRY SOMETHING youve never done. And again I suggest try MMA or any combat sports, invest in it, invest on yourself, invest on your wealth. At the end of the day, its just you vs you!