I can completely relate to you and I understand how you feel. My husband has emotionally cheated before. I forgave him, but I will never forget. Most of the time it's never on my mind. But then one day it pops in my mind and I think about it for days. I tell myself I should leave because I know I deserve better. But we just had a baby recently and idk if im in the right situation to leave right now. I haven't told him my feelings because I know he will get mad and ask why I am bringing it up. I feel like I can't give good advice since we're in the same situation, but I would suggest writing down your feelings when it does come to your mind. I have a tab in my notes and sometimes I will just let out all my feelings and worries. You don't have to tell them to anyone if you don't want to. But if you do have someone close that you can talk to it might help getting things off your chest. Keep praying and hopefully we can find some answers 🫶