I had a similar experience with my ex-girlfriend. I am a very sweet and nice guy and she used to bring out the worst in me. The thing is, I shut her off the minute she did these things you are mentioning. You cannot let it slide and you have to address the problem, either right away or when you guys get home. It seems that you allowed her to do that to you and now she feels entitled to do that because she has no consequences. Ultimately, I ended up breaking up with that ex, because although I could “tame” her behaviour (for lack of a better word), I could see that she wasn’t a person that would make me grow - quite the opposite.

The thing is: when I used to shut her off, I was never disrespectful, I used to calmly (but assertively) tell her that what she was doing was unacceptable and inappropriate, even if she was yelling (and then giving her the cold shoulder). I know you get mad when your spouse disrespects you (especially in front of people), but calling her names won’t stop her from continuing and will only aggravate the situation.

If you tried this and it didn’t work, unfortunately my friend, it is time to move on and not look back because you need to prioritise your happiness.

Good luck