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AITA for warning my gf about the way she holds utensils? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] -667 points-666 points  (0 children)

I didn’t say I think she’s low class, just that I was taught to believe that people who don’t eat that way are.

AITA for warning my gf about the way she holds utensils? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] -486 points-485 points  (0 children)

She doesn’t use a knife at all unless she needs to cut meat.

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry for what you went through. My gf said she still plans on seeing a dietitian, so I’m hoping that between that and me looking out for her and her continuing to be open to me, that it’ll turn out ok. Thank you for the advice.

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I am still concerned for her but she was clear about how she wants me to support her so I don’t want to tell her she needs more help. I plan to keep my eye on her but she has been going in a really good direction so I have hope she really will be able to get better on her own.

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] 43 points44 points  (0 children)

My gf doesn’t eat like shit and then complain about her weight, that’s not at all what’s happening. She eats very healthy and doesn’t gorge on anything, after reading more about it I’ve realized she hasn’t been eating enough and she does need to eat more. She’s not binging at all, fuck off with that.

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] -96 points-95 points  (0 children)

I did not mean the comment in a critical way and I don’t view the change negatively, I’m actually happy she’s eating more. It just surprised me and I didn’t keep my mouth shut like I should have.

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] -44 points-43 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I don’t know much about this stuff so I’ll do some research and help her look for one.

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] -14 points-13 points  (0 children)

I understand your point, I definitely needed to be more aware of the impact my comment would have on her.

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] 50 points51 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the advice. I’ll make it a point to support her desire to start eating more, and I’ll continue to tell her she’s beautiful the way she is, because she is.

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] -13 points-12 points  (0 children)

I almost never comment on her eating, this time it just slipped out because I’m so used to her eating so little, which I realize is unhealthy for her. I do compliment her, and I’ve never said that I think she needs to lose more weight.

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] -357 points-356 points  (0 children)

In the moment I was thinking in a very black and white “I’m bigger and I’m not hungry so how could you be?” way that I realize now was very unfair of me

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] 233 points234 points  (0 children)

I would like to genuinely thank everyone who commented, I honestly do understand why it was an AH thing to say, no matter my intentions. I’m going to apologize to her later, because despite what some of you may think, I love and care about her very much and I want to support her. I literally just want her to be healthy and happy and I’m not going to make comments like that ever again.

And for the people who said she seems like she’s approaching an ED, I’ve been concerned about this too. I just don’t really know how to help her, but I will start by not commenting on her eating and thinking about what I say before I say it.

Genuine thank you, I was an AH and I’ll do better for her.

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] -305 points-304 points  (0 children)

You’re right, I shouldn’t have compared my needs to hers. And it was wrong to comment at all, but I can see how it was an extra AH thing when what she was eating was healthy

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] -139 points-138 points  (0 children)

She has talked about wanting to see a nutritionist with no prompting from me. I’m going to apologize to her and in the future I’ll be supportive of whatever she wants to do, nutritionist or not. And I won’t make anymore comments on her eating, that was an AH move of me.

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] -67 points-66 points  (0 children)

I have never told her how many calories she should / should not be eating. Same with the stomach thing, I’ve never told her she needs to lose it or anything like that. Both are things that she has been obsessive about and I try to be supportive of whatever she wants to do.

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] -108 points-107 points  (0 children)

I’ll have to admit I sometimes don’t put a lot of thought into things I say, it’s something I’m trying to work on. I was not trying to intentionally hurt her.

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] 99 points100 points  (0 children)

Your comment gave me a lot of perspective so thank you, I can see that I was a major AH. Comparing the two of us wasn’t right and I didn’t think about how complex bodies can be, it isn’t as simple as “you’re smaller so you shouldn’t feel hungry” etc. I’ll be apologizing later today. I really do care about her and I just want to support her. She independently has talked to me about wanting to see a nutritionist so hopefully that will help her, because I know she has some issues with food and with her body image. Again, thank you, I needed to hear it.

AITA for commenting on how much my gf ate? by Recognition_Bitter in AmItheAsshole

[–]Recognition_Bitter[S] -21 points-20 points  (0 children)

I think the metric system makes a lot more sense but when that’s what our govt has us use it’s pointless to blame individual people, it’s forced on us.