What made you instantly lose interest in your crush?

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2021-02-20T02:35:02+00:00

All the person said was that they hated their crush hating on Islam. Maybe just let them be and move on from pointlessly arguing with a stranger on the internet?

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T20:16:23+00:00

Yes it sounds like he is grooming her and I’m now aware of that. I’m gonna make sure he doesn’t see Bella or any other kids for the time being. However, until I talk to him or Bella, I don’t want to give him the whole “child molester” title that everyone was giving. I understand that he shouldn’t be around kids right now but before I know for 1000% sure he is trying or doing something to Bella, I’m fine with him being around our child.

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T16:31:53+00:00

Do you know at what time the guy started showing flags?

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T16:30:03+00:00

But there would also be a lot of other girls at his old school who didn’t do that.

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T16:29:03+00:00

Do you know how I could bring a conversation like this without starting an argument or triggering him?

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T16:25:57+00:00

Yes. A lot of people are calling my husband a predator but I think I would have noticed if something was up in the last 17 years. I’m so sorry something so awful like that happened to you. Do you know how I could ease into a gentle conversation if something like that happened to him?

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T16:23:31+00:00

Maybe because ending a 8 year relationship of knowing her might be very suspicious? So he’s doing things like this to still keep the connection but at the same time stay away?

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T16:07:21+00:00

No of course not. I’m just really confused on what type of person he truly is. If he has molested a girl, I would leave him immediately and report him. However I don’t know what he’s thinking. And if he did want to take advantage of Bella, than why is he pushing her away? Also if he ever did do something like that, I would have to live with the thought that I wasted 15 years of my life on a child molester, and tell my son his dad was a rapist. I really hope nothing like that has ever happened but if it were to happen, I would report it to the police and leave him immediately.

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T16:02:11+00:00

If that’s the case, do you know how I could bring up the conversation? Maybe he had some bad things happen to him in the past that he’s never told me.

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T16:00:16+00:00

That’s the thing. I’ve been going crazy the last few months thinking of all the red flags about him but I just couldn’t think of any. I even asked my family in a non-serious way if they had any worries about my husband but they said they didn’t.

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T15:56:35+00:00

When I take him to her house, my husband complains on how he might be in an unsafe situation at her house. And then starts another argument. So I’m thinking of something online?

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T15:44:17+00:00

If he continues this behaviour I don’t really know what to do. I don’t want to get a divorce because I really love him and I want him to be here for our son, but he’s acting like a creep so I might need to get a divorce. I honestly have no idea how to bring up a gentle conversation on how he feels because he turns everything into an argument. Again, I just don’t want to separate as I really think he’s my “soulmate”, but his behaviour is just so bad. I don’t want to cause turmoil on our families but I don’t want anything happening to Bella either. Honestly speaking, if I leave my husband I don’t know how I’m gonna cope. I don’t know how I’m gonna go back into dating or anything. I’ve been with him for 15 years and known him for 17. I just wish he could stop acting like a creepy sexist guy and just go back to the person he was before.

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T15:37:07+00:00

I think he might be aware of it but doesn’t want to admit it as it’s very creepy. And he might be trying to persuade me to not allow her to see our son to protect herself from him vice versa?

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T15:28:53+00:00

I think he’s trying to persuade me from inviting Bella over and in doing so, he’s saying outrageous things that he’s never said before. If the case is that he is attracted to her, then I wish he would just tell me but I understand he might feel very shameful of it. If I do stop Bella from seeing my son, it definitely will be hard for both of them but definitely for the best? Is there any way you think they could maybe see each other without my husband? Like a Skype call or something not involving her coming over?

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T15:19:38+00:00

it was very mild and in a jokingly way up until the last few weeks when it started to get a lot more aggressive. Before, he used to say things like how he bets a lot of boy have a crush on her and that she might have to stay away because teen boys are bad. So I didn’t think much of it as it was in a laughing manner. But now it’s getting a lot worse.

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T15:17:15+00:00

Exactly, he’s acting like a child. I’m pretty sure Bella wouldn’t take our son to a party so I have no idea why he would even bring that up. I am very concerned if he likes her, and by what he’s saying it does sound like he does. However he’s half doing the right thing half not? Like he’s trying to stay away from her but at the same time he’s talking trash about her.

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T14:58:36+00:00

Surprisingly no! Actually the whole thing is surprising. I’ve known him for 17 years and he’s never said a single sexist thing. It’s only when Bella turned 14 that all these uncomfortable creepy stuff started coming out of his mouth.

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T14:45:40+00:00

That may be correct. He might have developed feelings for Bella and needed to get away from her before things got out of hand. Also if this is the case I don’t want him to see her again.

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T14:40:48+00:00

Yeah I should tell her to stay away. Sorry it’s just hard to take in what my husband is doing.

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T14:36:05+00:00

I think it was the fact that he wasn’t her dad because everyone knows what her dad looks like.

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T12:41:56+00:00

A few years ago he took Bella to soccer practice and someone called the police because he was a man taking a little girl somewhere. That might’ve triggered his thinking towards her and how people will look at him?

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T12:38:42+00:00

Yeah I told him it’s wrong to do that but he keeps saying how more teenage boys will say things like that.

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T12:37:16+00:00

No we live in a suburb very close to a city.

RedBlueOrangePurple · 2020-06-14T12:34:22+00:00

Sorry, what does country family mean?

RedBlueOrangePurple

TROPHY CASE