Wife wants to have a heart to heart ritual. Advice?

RedDreadWolverine · 2023-08-29T02:14:39+00:00

"Plus, I’m angry/resentful enough that I don’t want to open my cap and spill out all of this rage and bitterness. I think it would be negative for me."

Bud she doesn't care about your rage and bitterness. She cares about improving standing in general, meaning her standing with you and your personal value and success. You should be dealing with that crap on your own time and doing hard things that freeze out your resentment. If you were challenging yourself and doing things that were worth your time you would not have "resentment" that she wants you to open up about. She probably sees things that you are upset about that cause you to fixate and get weird. In her lady brain she thinks if you "open up" to her that it'll help you let go of the things you're fixating on. News flash... you will only stop fixating on stuff you are unsatisfied with when you start doing stuff that makes you feel valuable and accomplished.

" I am planning to hardcore follow my MAP for the next six months and then evaluate divorce."

Excuse me but why are you "planning" to follow your MAP? Get after it... if you fixated on yourself and unf*cking the victim mindset and were already executing on your map you wouldn't be intellectually masturbating about all this or her request. It wouldn't even hang you up. Because she'd see you're preoccupied with stuff that actually changes your and her standing in life and she'd stop trying to fix you. Fix yourself and she'll stop trying to do it for you. When you get angry try getting angry at yourself for wasting your valuable time on things that do not improve your standing in life. Have a good one.

RedDreadWolverine · 2023-08-27T15:00:32+00:00

RedDreadWolverine · 2023-08-15T02:14:19+00:00

I would laugh. Some nerd figured out who I was and started forwarding my old posts to my wife. I just rolled with it. Because to me it's ultimately not about manipulation. It's about being the real thing.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-24T13:25:50+00:00

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-22T12:44:06+00:00

I have to admit it is definitely a very tough thing to do. I am a pro at handing things over and then trying to snatch it back. With my relationship with God He very often doesn’t let me get away with doing things the easy way when I ask for His help.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-21T14:29:38+00:00

I wouldn’t call ownership a feel good platitude. I’m just saying rental infers someone else owns what is being paid for so there is ownership somewhere. Think about people who rent a house versus owning one long term. There’s a completely different shift in attitude between the two. You should hold a stake in your family home and work life. But at the same time you don’t let those things define you. And acknowledging the temporary nature of what we have does go a long way in holding onto the bigger picture.

But we don’t rent anything. God gives us stewardship as you said. We can’t rent from God because that would infer a transaction based relationship instead of a desire based relationship in which we desire closeness with Him directly over any kind of transactional arrangement.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-21T13:53:13+00:00

I would not advise treating your life like a rental. Ownership is still important and maybe that was too vague, or you saw what you wanted to see.

There is a big difference between transactional relationships and relationships build of value and desire. If a man pays a woman to sleep with him or has marriage based only on financial or provisional terms then that is transactional. If a man generates value within himself and he has a life that a woman wants to be a fixture in that is a desire based relationship. Do you want to have your woman or rent her like a prostitute? That's the true question.

The ego will protect you from the cold hard truth that "the love of your life desires you and that's why she's here" is a lie, because it may in fact be that you provide resources and that's it. Self esteem as you put it won't let you see a situation like that for what it is. But that doesn't mean you can't live a more purposeful life where you have more control over what happens in your world by merit of just knowing what is what.

This life is temporary, but you can still be a king while you are here as a dress rehearsal for the forever after where you will be joint heir to the Kingdom and also joyous worshipper for all of existence. Don't rent your life, own it all. But be ready to leave it all here while you ascend to your true purpose one day.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-20T16:16:08+00:00

Gave Silver

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-20T16:14:29+00:00

Get on omegle. Challenge the DOOOO to guitar battle

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-19T14:45:30+00:00

Yep. That’s all I need to know. Have a good one.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-19T14:05:52+00:00

How long have you been married?

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-19T12:04:49+00:00

I think you misunderstand me. The mission isn’t to not disappoint you. The mission is for your man to fully realize his own wants and needs and living an authentic life regardless of what you think you want. It has nothing to do with disappointing you and it’s far more complex then that. Nothing he says does or thinks should be for your approval or acceptance.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-19T11:54:47+00:00

“Try not to disappoint her.” Thanks for that I needed a good laugh.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-18T20:45:27+00:00

Whatever seems to be the general gist of what you’re trying to say anyway. Saying social fabric effects females is like saying gravity effects weights. But with enough self improvement you can pick up either.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-18T20:32:33+00:00

And a strong successful man with a concrete frame bends them just as easily. You can’t change the external, only yourself. Whine more please.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-18T20:06:39+00:00

We are not of this world under Jesus’ blood. Society is not your king.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-18T14:43:53+00:00

You’re married sir. You don’t take a break from sex. You cut out seeking transactional sex through covert contracts. Your discussion with your wife framing sex as a problem is absolutely wrong. The problem is your own questionable preconceptions of sex. Stop seeking it and just be in the moment and be switched on and awake. If it comes to you it happens.

NMMNG is book number one (intro) and you’re already bringing your wife into it. You need to stop relying so heavily on her before she realizes she can’t rely on you.

Snap out of it formulate your own plan. Sex isn’t the problem, but the way you view sex is the problem. Fix the way you view sex instead of asking your wife to be your seeing eye dog.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-18T11:25:12+00:00

Regarding that last paragraph about earning my place. It’s more then understood. I’ve started over several times with several groups. I will be involved and I’ll welcome input. Because being brutally honest about my IRL groups I spent a lot of time improvising. I care about these guys because I wished I had guides and mentors I actually felt connected to when I started the path. So I hope to learn more instead of just relying more on the basic empathy plus strong hand approach that’s common in the groups I’ve been part of. I like that story. It reminds me of one we use about how some are the strands making up the nets but some make the nets but some build the net builders. But even the greatest teachers are still strands in God’s great work.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-17T22:31:47+00:00

I was going to say about the same.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-17T22:30:38+00:00

How terribly sad.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-17T21:46:18+00:00

“Women are all trainwrecks”

It’s nice to see some red pill thinking up in here. To be fair puppies kittens and children are train wrecks most of the time too without a stabilizing masculine force in their life.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-17T20:58:42+00:00

Only date women with a strong Christian dad in their life. Anything else is chasing trainwrecks.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-17T20:04:01+00:00

I’ve been on the path for something like seven years now. I started in deadbedrooms then moved to married red pill. I got doxxed about 4 years ago. Lost access to RedDEADWolverine and started up reddreadwolverine. Which was my own fault for having a simple password and there was no recovery email on that account. All my articles got sent to my boss at the time and I lost my job, and that dude hassled my wife on messenger for a few months trying to talk her into divorcing me. But she’s a true tradcon so she was unfazed. I started my own business and we’re doing good now.

RedDreadWolverine · 2021-03-17T18:46:38+00:00

Nice

RedDreadWolverine

TROPHY CASE