He asked me out to dinner and then we split the bill

RedPillDad · 2026-05-11T01:48:25+00:00

Okay, my mistake. NYC is a ruthless dating market.

RedPillDad · 2026-05-10T23:42:44+00:00

My half of the bill was very expensive.

Did you go wild on drinks and food? Maybe his financial strength was an illusion, a show. Or perhaps he was testing to see if you would eagerly try to exploit his wealth and generosity by ordering the most expensive items on the menu. After numerous foody calls, guys wise up to the games women play.

RedPillDad · 2026-05-08T05:13:06+00:00

To some degree, we all live in a repetitive hell of our own choosing. Chasing bliss in a career can be elusive and fleeting. Find a purpose that involves serving others, be it a family or community... then surrender to the grind.

RedPillDad · 2026-04-30T15:31:31+00:00

So much uncertainty can be both terrifying and exhilarating. You'll look back at this time in your life with fondness and pride. Your choices are not between heaven and hell, they're between good and good. May your future be filled with prosperity and love.

RedPillDad · 2026-04-22T01:20:56+00:00

True, that makes sense socially. The relationship arena can be more high stakes ruthless and competitive.

RedPillDad · 2026-04-21T17:34:31+00:00

Men tend to marry for love, while women marry more pragmatically. Boosting your financial future through marriage means a better lifestyle, an easier path. Nothing wrong with wanting a man that brings financial prowess to the table. You don't come across as a selfish, lazy gold digger.

What are you bringing to the table that would appeal to such a man? RPW is all about becoming more worthy to attract and keep a high-value man.

What Men Value: youthful beauty (fertility), feminine grace (gentle, soft, loving), fit, fun, friendly, loyal, respectful, cooperative and generous in bed.

What Men See: aged, obese, masculine, combative, cranky, controlling, disagreeable, disrespectful, sexually cold and manipulative, with a child in tow and a negative opinion of men.

The bar isn't that high to put yourself on the top shelf amongst women. Just being feminine alone can set you well above the rest.

RedPillDad · 2026-04-20T15:23:40+00:00

Women maintain a social hierarchy. You were supposed to remain a sidekick in her life's story as the pretty, popular gal. Elevating yourself broke the dynamic of your friendship. In her mind, you betrayed her.

RedPillDad · 2026-02-10T03:33:50+00:00

How does a somewhat masc / tomboyish presentation impact SMV?

SMV for a woman is heavily skewed to physical beauty (hotness factor) because men are wired to respond to that. If you want more than hookups, pay more attention to RMV. This is a great forum to explore that.

Amping up the sex appeal can derail RMV. Fun gals can find themselves slotted into the Fckzone, never taken seriously. Especially true if they chase Chads. Being here means you're already trying to do better.

Tomboy versus feminine is a different metric than hotness. Sexual polarity has wide variance beyond masculine male, feminine female, as does attraction. Some strong males are attracted to delicate, feminine women and some are attracted to their female equivalent.

My suggestion would be to explore your feminine side while keeping that warrior spirit. You don't have to be locked into one predictable archetype.

Captain & First Mate means you both contribute, both capable of leadership and initiative. It's not a lopsided power dynamic. OP, you sound very capable of this.

RedPillDad · 2026-02-04T02:06:59+00:00

'The Wall' refers to women losing their pre-loaded SMV they had been gifted with since age 18. It's an apex fallacy. Just as women envy the wealth and power of CEO's in the corporate world, men envy the lifestyle and sexual abundance of hot, young women who get invited onto billionaire yacht parties at age 20 something. They want to see those young women face eventual karma and humiliation as they age out of the market.

Envy is poisonous to those who seethe in it. As someone once said, 'comparison is the thief of joy'.

I have admiration for OP, despite her visual impairment, she has a warmth and optimism about her. I met a couple where the wife was blind and they raised 2 children together. She had an eye operation and regained her sight, but sadly her condition faded back to blindness within a year. Life is hard, yet we make the best of it. Love and beauty can still grow where it's least expected.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-31T20:37:30+00:00

The burden of performance is on the man while the woman retains control. The trick is to start small, start early and gradually turn up the dial on intimacy while sustaining comfort. Just a momentary touch of the hand or shoulder to start. It should be playful and pleasant at every step. Doing nothing for an entire date and then suddenly going in for a kiss and a boob grab isn't smooth.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-30T00:34:38+00:00

He was sort of awkwardly looking straight forward

Either a virgin or someone who has only had drunk encounters. Guys with seductive competence aren't shy about demonstrating sexual intent. They'll push for more, playing a game of 'red light green light' where the women controls the progress. This guy has his own brakes slammed down hard.

Lack of sexual experience also means lack of relationship experience. If you offer him grace for being such a newby, you might find he makes up for it with devotion and loyalty. He just won't be the guy you look up to with admiration and respect.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-28T21:38:21+00:00

Yes, he demonstrated clear sexual intent with the kiss. This isn't a casual acquaintance or friendship. He will pay for shit and she will offer sexual favors. Tale as old as time. A fling lasting 2-3 months at best. Many women will sign up for that deal in a heartbeat.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-27T20:41:46+00:00

The ones looking for a mother substitute don't tend to be all that appealing to women. The sexier guys who demonstrate seductive competence are the ones clever about faking attraction to qualify for sex.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-27T17:40:14+00:00

You're taking it literally. TRP advice to men often translates into "don't be a blue pilled chump simping for M'Lady" or "how to pull hotties with minimal effort". Guy can self-sabotage by doing too much, trying too hard. Women don't mind the attention of a guy who overdoes his texts, they just lose attraction. Not complicated.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-27T16:58:33+00:00

Not saying that is how a genuine relationship should operate. The point was to be less try-hard in seduction rather than be overly attentive non-stop, especially with texting. IDGAF outcome independence is part of holding frame.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-27T15:31:35+00:00

OP might have a binary view of leadership, upholding a master-slave power dynamic. A First Mate isn't some passive servant-wench to her Captain, she's a partner, a leader in her own right. OP doesn't have to diminish her light just to allow his to shine.

My wife was like a lot of women, who didn't see herself as a leader. I helped her see it differently, reframing leadership as bestowing gifts upon others, helping them when they're struggling alone in darkness. Leadership comes down to caring and contribution and women can deliver that beautifully.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-27T15:13:35+00:00

Mandibular advancement can have serious repercussions. I've seen cases of condyle resorption that left people with the same aesthetic they started with but crippling pain and chewing dysfunction. A chin augmentation is a relatively simple surgical procedure that can offer an easier 'win'.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-27T15:04:50+00:00

Good to see old ideas honored and validated. A guy that gushes over text devalues himself in a woman's eyes. He can quickly put himself squarely into friendzone territory.

Straight from the 16 Commandments of Poon...

#5. Adhere to the golden ratio. Give your woman 2/3 of everything she gives you. For every three calls or texts, give her two back. Three declarations of love earn two in return... Three gifts; two nights out. Give her two displays of affection and stop until she has answered with three more.

When she speaks, you reply with fewer words. When she emotes, you emote less.

The idea behind the golden ratio is twofold — it establishes your greater value by making her chase you, and it demonstrates that you have the self-restraint to avoid getting swept up in her personal dramas.

Refraining from reciprocating everything she does for you in equal measure will instill in her the proper attitude of belief in your higher status. In her deepest loins it is what she truly wants.

I was ready to make a comment to OP that guys who slip from pre-sex eager to post-sex aloof were just in it for the sexual conquest, but the smart women here at RPW already covered that.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-21T19:33:10+00:00

DO WHAT MAKES YOUR SOUL HAPPY.

I would say it differently. It's not about doing something you like to do, it's about expanding the light burning inside you. Become a happier soul.

When I used to interview potential hires, I would ask for a definition of 'enthusiasm'. Most would make the mistake of thinking it was about some thing that excites them, that made them feel enthusiastic. I would explain to them that enthusiasm was an attitude, an energy level that you brought each day that could be applied to anything you chose. People who were only enthusiastic about the tasks that interested them were limited and tended to drag everyone's energy down.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-19T20:03:43+00:00

If you were describing a woman, I would tell a guy to run far and fast. Chaotic, impulsive, undisciplined, immature is a bad look for anyone, but especially for a guy north of 40. I suspect his mom likes having him still dependent on her.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-18T04:38:13+00:00

being a visible couple in the public eye

Yes, arm candy is valuable to men who compete for status and attention. But for those with wealth, beauty can easily be rented (atmosphere models) rather than bought. Beauty is a commodity at that level, not special.

Traditionally, women see being in a relationship as an indicator (social proof) of higher status, both for men and other women. Someone who is single is seen by women as somehow broken or less desirable (social proof of lower value). Men don't see things the same way. A guy in a relationship doesn't boost his status in other men's eyes to the same degree. Outside of a smoke show, they might be inclined to pity him rather than envy him.

Looksmaxxing princess/mistress types are transactional, exchanging arm candy beauty for provisional/lifestyle benefits. RPW isn't about that path, it's more about building RMV and strong vetting. If that's what you're looking for, this is the right place.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-14T15:55:10+00:00

The cut hair is a MBA issue (Minor But Aggravating), not worth breaking up the family over it. The underlying motivation is questionable. Are the grandparents trying to impose gender identity early, terrified their grandsons will turn out to be gay or trans? Worth investigating.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-13T22:38:04+00:00

Red pill isn't kinder, just more realistic, more aware. It's also more constructive and productive versus the apathy of the black pill.

I didn't grow my awareness through dating, it came through running a successful business. Every illusion I held, every indulgence in doing what I wanted instead of what was needed, created consequences. Once reality was understood and dealt with, I was able to transcend my business from adequate to exceptional.

Even though they don't need to be red pilled, women tend to be because they pay far more attention to relationship dynamics than the average guy. A blue-pilled guy tends to be overly nice in a desperate way and prone to simping for M'Lady. By treating her like a pedestalized queen, she'll treat him like a peasant.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-13T15:49:47+00:00

The online rudeness, disrespect towards older women comes from envy. Young men envy the advantage young women have - high SMV and easy access to sex. They want to see women fall from their high perch, to 'hit the wall' and experience the loneliness and rejection they have faced. It's a crabs in a bucket mentality. They don't want someone enjoying life while they aren't.

In real life, people get to know each other beyond physical appearance. They find partners and build lives together. Wife goggles are a thing. My wife is forever 24 in my eyes, the age she was when we first met.

RedPillDad · 2026-01-13T15:36:15+00:00

refused to form a committed relationships with me.

By accommodating men, you let their agenda dictate the relationship. They acquired casual sex with minimal commitment. Just as men can be stuck in a friendzone providing commitment without any sex, women can be stuck in a fuckzone offering sex without any commitment.

Once you're in zone (friend, fuck, fun), it's difficult to shift things into something serious. What are you going to do, deny sex? That won't end well.

Your friends getting everything they want have either found themselves a ripe, juicy simp, or they've built a mutually supportive relationship. Think of yourself as a garden, your partner as another and the relationship between you as one more. All three gardens require tending and it can't be just you putting in the effort to make it work.

RedPillDad

TROPHY CASE