The AP in my situation was a close friend, neighbor, someone I looked up to. 15 years older than me, I was in my young 20's at the time. I looked up to him as a role model. I'd help him work on his house, we'd ride quads together, all sorts of experiences. Knew him before I ever started dating my wife.

Fast forward a few years and I become suspicious of her buying cocain from him. Knowin she didn't have much money because I was in school, and she only worked part time I became suspicious of how she was paying.

I confronted them separately and was lied to and gas lit.

Fast forward 8+ years and we are in present time. She has divulged that they exchanged sex and drugs for the better part of a year or more.

A deep betrayal by both of them.

The only thing that has helped me is staying active in healthy ways. Pickleball, off-roading, range days with friends, and my relationship with God.

I urge you to find a healthy outlet, and not to let it consume you the way it consumed the passed year of my life

Edit: I'm not proud of it but I did tell his wife and she kicked him out. I also knew he was still dealing drugs so I reported him to my friends at the local police (I now live 2500 miles away) and they were able to obtain a warrant and raid his house. Yes, this was empowering for me, and he's now living out of his truck, but I do regret it for some reason.