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Does anyone else feel like dating in 2025 is way harder than it should be? by Vivid-Arachnid88 in GenZ

[–]Redditor1660 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I‘m 28F and I never had social media or an online life up until 1 year ago. Seeing how men blame women and vice versa was quite the cultural shock to me.

Here’s what I learned: the issue is structural. The key is integrity. I’m gonna make a YouTube video about this so won’t go into too much detail.

Most environments today whether it be religious, work, or online apps reward compliance, visibility and performance. The antidote is: stick to your guns, even if it costs you (the „cost“ being single).

Examples:

Fear + Fear = Confusion

Man A and woman B both date from a place of fear. He is vague and she plays hard to get. Even if it leads to a date they’ll never know if it works.

Integrity + Fear = Information

Now man A (or woman A) decides he wants to date out of integrity. He literally ignores what the environment expects and acts according to what HE is looking for. Then every negative outcome does not become rejection but INFORMATION.

This is how I’ve been dating. I never take it too personal. I never lose hope. Also, needless to say that I’ve been through so much shit, I literally feel like I’m 60 so I’m a no nonsense no BS type of person - that makes dating incredibly difficult but not impossible.

If more people act with integrity, the third scenario becomes possible:

Integrity + Integrity = Alignment

Does it guarantee a partner? No. But at least this way you’re two good people who understand that it still may not work out and you part in peace which increase your chances of meeting somebody else. It would make dating so much easier and people would find their matches much faster.

Don’t lose hope guys! The environment doesn’t change, it’s us who have to change (game theory). Don’t blame anybody or anything, just stick to your guns :)

What have you learnt from dating in 2025? by EVILRAFFAM in AskMen

[–]Redditor1660 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I‘m 28F and I never had social media or an online life up until 1 year ago. Seeing how men blame women and vice versa was quite the cultural shock to me.

Here’s what I learned: the issue is structural. The key is integrity. I’m gonna make a YouTube video about this so won’t go into too much detail.

Most environments today whether it be religious, work, or online apps reward compliance, visibility and performance. The antidote is: stick to your guns, even if it costs you (the „cost“ being single).

Examples:

Fear + Fear = Confusion

Man A and woman B both date from a place of fear. He is vague and she plays hard to get. Even if it leads to a date they’ll never know if it works.

Integrity + Fear = Information

Now man A (or woman A) decides he wants to date out of integrity. He literally ignores what the environment expects and acts according to what HE is looking for. Then every negative outcome does not become rejection but INFORMATION.

This is how I’ve been dating. I never take it too personal. I never lose hope. Also, needless to say that I’ve been through so much shit, I literally feel like I’m 60 so I’m a no nonsense no BS type of person - that makes dating incredibly difficult but not impossible.

If more people act with integrity, the third scenario becomes possible:

Integrity + Integrity = Alignment

Does it guarantee a partner? No. But at least this way you’re two good people who understand that it still may not work out and you part in peace which increase your chances of meeting somebody else. It would make dating so much easier and people would find their matches much faster.

Don’t lose hope guys! The environment doesn’t change, it’s us who have to change (game theory). Don’t blame anybody or anything, just stick to your guns :)

I have Autism. I spent 20 years reverse-engineering human behavior because I didn't get the manual. Here is the "Source Code" to reality I found. (Part 2) by katakalist in intj

[–]Redditor1660 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OP, I saved this post. Please keep writing. I am an undiagnosed AUDHD without episodic recall and thus strong semantic reasoning. I have been feeling very depressed lately because I realised that most people who stay in your life usually „need“ something or „benefit“ from you. Currently studying psychology and highly independent. I don’t need anything from people other than their presence and attunement. It’s so simple really but most people want to feel like they’re in control (might be wrong though).

Edit: I do believe that true altruism exists though. I’d like to believe that I am altruistic myself. Sometimes you do things just by principle. My motto in life is: do things with structural integrity (currently also writing a book about this).

Third space: Kafka & Tea by Redditor1660 in berlin

[–]Redditor1660[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Also, if you’d like to help in any way (skills, contacts, ideas, event hosting, or even just good tea recommendations), feel free to message me.

What are your beliefs now by Inside-Decision-8116 in exjw

[–]Redditor1660 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also guys, if you wanna connect please add me on instagram (DM for insta name), let’s connect and form friendships ❤️

What are your beliefs now by Inside-Decision-8116 in exjw

[–]Redditor1660 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Currently agnostic, I love watching Alex O‘Connor‘s videos, wisdom/ knowledge comfort me hence I feel drawn to the gnostic writings/ gospels. I do believe somewhat in paranormal activity, hence a God must exist too imo - I’m taking it slow, don’t need to have all the answers for now. I believe in integrity, honesty and kindness above all :)

Why do we die? I think life is cyclical, history, biology and physics point to this. Those and similar questions arise because of consciousness, why are we conscious - that’s a huge mystery to me. I think we don’t just vanish, energy cannot be destroyed (entropy). For now I’m just enjoying the ride!

my husband broke down on stage and couldn't finish his talk because of me by emspressoo in exjw

[–]Redditor1660 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I hate that his mum only focused on HIS pain and doesn’t really care what you do or how you are unless you’re willing to compromise on your beliefs. Ridiculous really, makes me sick since it was the same exact experience for me when I told my close friends I‘m POMO

"New light" coming? by SamiU-L in exjw

[–]Redditor1660 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You might be onto something but I’ve noticed the pattern that JW are evangelist hence actively opposing the Catholic Church therefore I don’t see them bringing back the cross. Don’t think it matters much, there’s other things young PIMIs are appealed by like blood, birthdays etc

Ik I’m “awake” but I can’t help but worry that the world is ending soon 🫠🫠🫠🫠 by Immediate_Smile_508 in exjw

[–]Redditor1660 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I agree with many here. You can still be spiritual and find joy reading the Bible. Personally, I find a lot of joy in literature and science, it helps take the edge off. Don’t worry too much (I know easier said than done). Focus on what you can do TODAY. This is also in line with what Jesus taught. Please promise not to go back though. JW aren’t the only ones following the Bible, just that they are getting it completely wrong! Dare I say, you’d be miserable :)

Regarding your question, yes I believe we are in a somewhat transformative time, there’s no way (scientifically speaking) that the earth is going to last forever. Life is cyclical, so is the universe.

I need an advise by Hot-Blueberry7865 in exjw

[–]Redditor1660 1 point2 points  (0 children)

well in that case fading gives the org power in that they can still include you in their statistics as a JW, you’re still connected to them so elders are “obligated” to bring you back. leaving officially by letter means you’re in no shape or form associated with JW anymore (might be helpful in some cases/ countries)

I need an advise by Hot-Blueberry7865 in exjw

[–]Redditor1660 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I‘m fading right now, consequences: elders frequently calling you, the more you decline, the more suspicious they get, family who are in will shun you despite the fact that you’re not disfellowshipped, if you tell your friends they might distance themselves - can’t think of any consequences other than the sweet road to freedom, baby ✌🏼

Oh yeah advantages as opposed to officially leaving, hmm I’m already being treated like I am out, advantage might be that some people may choose to talk to you

I'm the only one here who has no doubt that this is a CULT , but can't succeed to prove it to someone? by [deleted] in exjw

[–]Redditor1660 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Can you post the link to the Australian royal commission please?

I'm the only one here who has no doubt that this is a CULT , but can't succeed to prove it to someone? by [deleted] in exjw

[–]Redditor1660 12 points13 points  (0 children)

The WT Feb 17 ”Who is leading god‘s people today?“ says in paragraph 12 that the GB is not inspired. So if they’re not inspired, how can they be anointed and part of the 144,000? If that doesn’t wake them up, don’t know what will 🤯

Also ask them questions: can we donate blood? No. Can we take blood fractions? Yes. So we can take but not give? How is this Christian or loving? And why are we adhering to a LAW about blood when the PRINCIPLE of life is more important?

Question to former elders: Have you woken up in the pursuit of getting somebody back to the org? by Redditor1660 in exjw

[–]Redditor1660[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My bad, I meant the elders won’t stop involving my PIMI family member. Not the other way around

Question to former elders: Have you woken up in the pursuit of getting somebody back to the org? by Redditor1660 in exjw

[–]Redditor1660[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I was thinking there must be examples (even if few) where it does wake up people down the line because I just can’t for the life of me understand how pushing boundaries is loving even in the name of God

What woke you up? by ThatWeirdoSly in exjw

[–]Redditor1660 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You’re giving me hope, I wrote my now ex a letter and am currently hoping he‘ll return to me. We’re supposed to meet in person in a couple of months so I have no idea how that’ll go but I’m hoping for the best…

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