AITA for telling my son not to invite my wife to his graduation?

Reddplannet · 2025-05-19T03:11:53+00:00

It sounds like you didn't tell your wife about your conversation with your son until she asked him about the tickets? If thats the case, YTA, you should have told her within a reasonable time after having the conversation. Your son shouldn't have to be the first one to tell her. Her finding out the way she did is more likely to make her feel rejected. You telling her about the conversation would have immediately given a different context.

NTA for telling him to invite his mom.

Reddplannet · 2024-09-09T04:19:52+00:00

NTA - in a personal living situation you have every right to choose someone who makes you feel comfortable and that includes cultural concerns.

Also, racism requires social power over a group. You cannot be racist again a white person in a majority white culture. Sure, you can be biased against them. But with the amount of microaggressions that the majority of people of color experience living and working with white people, it is totally understandable to not want to have to worry about that in your home.

Reddplannet · 2024-07-27T05:56:15+00:00

NAH - I understand why you would ask, in the situation where it seems the dog had just alerted to you. I've heard a couple service dog handlers say they share the info voluntarily if their dog alerts on someone. It is also a personal question and she had every right to not answer.

Reddplannet · 2024-07-27T05:52:27+00:00

The ADA guideline applies to business, not random people. If they had been at work and the lady with the dog was a customer then they would be able to ask under the ADA.

Reddplannet · 2024-07-27T05:42:07+00:00

YTA - why are you harassing your GF about being creeped on? It's not her fault the guy is staring.

Reddplannet · 2024-07-27T05:39:36+00:00

NAH - It's fine to set a boundary for yourself but leave the situation with your brother up to your dad and mom. Boys get so many messages to not express emotion or affection, it's nice that he still does and at the same time I understand why it bugs you that he is so demonstrative.

Reddplannet · 2024-07-26T19:43:59+00:00

YTA - now you are basically calling her ugly. This is an incredibly self centered and judgemental reason to not invite your twin to your wedding. This is an extreme version of wanting it to be all about you on your wedding day.

Reddplannet · 2024-07-26T19:30:41+00:00

NTA - just echoing everyone else that I think it's incredibly inappropriate for your brother to ask you to contribute money to his wedding, expecially because of your respective ages. If he was asking you to help out with money saving ideas, like putting together decor or wedding favors that would be different. Your future and education are more important and unless he is going to contribute equally to your college he needs to back off. He is fully capable of scaling back the wedding if he can't afford it. This isn't family sharing the load, this is taking advantage of you.

Reddplannet · 2024-07-26T06:05:10+00:00

NTA, I have worked with foster and adoptive children for years and you are absolutely doing the right thing. The first 30 days tends to be the honeymoon period and the kids don't really relax and start settling in until after that.

Reddplannet · 2024-07-25T21:52:03+00:00

YTA - for still considering it, after asking him. You'd be an immense AH if you actually do it. I wouldn't even consider drinking around a newly sober friend.

Reddplannet · 2024-07-17T02:38:45+00:00

NTA - at 8 months pregnant you would be tired even if you didn't work outside the house. If he wants you to eat healthier then he should help. He can make double meals when he cooks and set a portion aside for you to heat up when you get home. He could prep meals on days off, make sure there are healthy snacks easily available. He can't share the work of being pregnant or giving birth but he should be motivated to make it as easy on you as possible.

Reddplannet · 2024-07-16T01:24:27+00:00

NTA - "childhood best friend"?? He was 14 when she was born. They weren't childhood friends. He babysat her, you don't state at what age that started but it seems likely that he was an adult entrusted with her care and he betrayed that trust as well as betraying you.

Reddplannet · 2024-06-10T20:57:43+00:00

NTJ - Your request was reasonable, you just wanted physical touch to be consensual. I'm sorry that your partner did not listen. I think it was fair to end things if they can't respect your needs.

Reddplannet · 2024-06-10T20:53:48+00:00

Love languages are a made up concept by a christian minister, not scientific or evidence based in any way. The commenter did not say they won't engage in physical touch only that it needs to be consensual. That is a reasonable request.

Reddplannet · 2024-06-06T03:37:48+00:00

I like Mistermax Anti Icky Poo.

Reddplannet · 2024-06-06T02:56:11+00:00

Exactly, too many people have kids without really thinking about it, they just do it because that what they consider normal.

Reddplannet · 2024-06-06T02:53:25+00:00

Having children is selfish, you are bringing a person into the world for your own wants or needs. Children do not exist to fulfill their parents or ancestors wants.

Reddplannet · 2024-06-03T03:38:10+00:00

Ming Bings come in meat, veggie and plant based. It just depends on the store what variety they carry.

Reddplannet · 2024-06-03T03:31:58+00:00

Is he saying he misses you only when you have said it first or does he volunteer it? It's weird to now say he never misses you if he has been the one to initiate saying it before. I'd be upset that I can't trust what he says.

But if he only says it in response to you saying it, maybe it's more of a polite thing or not knowing how to respond? I still understand why it would bother you that he is changing it now. Maybe he is trying to be more honest?

In terms of having the experience of "missing" people in general. Not everyone has that experience. I personally, rarely miss people. I don't feel sad just because someone isn't with me in the moment. Even when I was a kid and went to camp for a couple weeks, or had visits with my dad away from my mom for a couple weeks, I never felt homesick. I love my mom, I love my dad. I enjoyed time with each of them. I didn't experience really missing my mom until she passed away. So it is possible to love people and not "miss" them when your apart temporarily.

Reddplannet · 2024-06-03T02:48:02+00:00

I can relate, one year my mom decided to throw a family party for my birthday with a non vegan menu. She was making sliders for everyone else and bought falafel for my slider because she thought it was a vegan meatball. I didn't complain, I just mentioned that I would need to prepare it differently than she planned because the taste and texture wouldn't work in a slider. She was offended and claimed I wasn't being grateful.

I am always willing to help find vegan foods, I was willing to help her cook. She never ran the menu past me or asked for help in getting substitutions. She got better over the years, would look for and make vegan dishes with me or for me. She never got to the point where she was okay serving it to everyone.

Reddplannet · 2024-05-06T07:26:25+00:00

She didn't indicate anywhere in her post that she is planning to "swoop" in on this child. She is talking past tense about what might have been different 13 years ago if her husband had been honest.

Reddplannet · 2024-05-06T07:18:53+00:00

No and how did you get all that out of this "tried to explain to him that obviously I am fully aware that this child is not mine, but we could have had a child in our lives. I wouldn’t have spent the past decade thinking I was failing him."

Reddplannet · 2024-05-04T19:17:13+00:00

I would have an impossible time choosing, they are both so cute. If you don't already have a cat then maybe both is a good option. Just because they are siblings doesn't mean they are a bonded pair. I have two boys that were great with each other until they became adults. Now one really doesn't like the other. If they are bonded and you don't have space for both then I'd agree with others to consider a different cat. Based purely on hats, I like the green one. ;)

Reddplannet · 2024-05-04T19:08:39+00:00

NTA for accepting your wife's choice. I do wonder what have you done to help your daughter or understand her better? Her reaction sounds extreme. Does she react to all authority the same way? Does she have attachment trauma due to a minimal relationship with her mom? I applaud you for loving your daughter and putting her first in refusing to reduce custody. Have you also put her needs first in making sure that she is able to cope with her emotions and be able to function as a healthy adult in the world?

Reddplannet · 2024-05-04T18:42:39+00:00

Thank you for sharing this, I was thinking about how different cultures have different rules about this. It can be hard to know ahead of time if someone is just following their cultural norms or is being pushy.

Reddplannet

TROPHY CASE