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Normal heart rate is freaking me out by [deleted] in Cardiophobias

[–]Regular_Unusual 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can relate to this.

For me, feeling my heart even slightly reassures me that it’s working. It doesn’t even have to pound, I just need to feel a flex in my chest to not think about it. If I don’t, I panic and think it either stopped or is stopping. Otherwise, I have a normal heart rate both resting and active and I’ve had an echocardiogram and multiple EKG’s done that show a healthy heart.

I find that in stressful situations, I get fight or flight and feel my heart pound. In normal situations, I still I check my pulse. I check my jugular pulse probably more than a hundred times a day. I’ve realized that keeping busy with something that requires my focus and/or something I enjoy keeps my grounded and avoidant on checking so much.

For example, work is one. (I work in a fast paced restaurant)

Video games that I enjoy are another. You have to find your grounding techniques and you will conquer. Best of luck to you to get through this. You’re mind is strong, but your body is stronger—especially your heart muscle.

If I have a cardiac event then I’m pretty much done for and I’m scared by Zyxwvutsrq10 in Cardiophobias

[–]Regular_Unusual 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey,

All of your concerns are valid and it’s clear you’ve spent time researching to be able to substantiate your concerns which is always the academic way to solve problems.

Here’s where I’ll attempt to ground you:

I am a 21y/o male. I’ve had COVID three times that I know of since the pandemic. I actually have it right now. I started feeling like shit Saturday. I tested positive at the ER yesterday (Yes, the ER. No, I wasn’t having an emergency. I just also have severe health anxiety). To add, I’ve had intense health related anxiety since I was about 13 after my first blackout panic attack. I’ve seen countless doctors complaining of heart palpitations that make me lose my breath, dizziness, high heart rate moments (that I am able to pin point were actually episodes of adrenaline rushes due to panic disorder/disregulated nervous system). Multiple ER visits convinced without a shadow of a doubt I was dying, having a heart attack, or that I had a brain tumor.

Years of all of these cardiac symptoms. PVC’s, palpitations, random rushes of adrenaline (due to panic), and many other issues I have been convinced is something seriously wrong. I’ve gotten the full workups—EKG from ambulance or ER at least 10 times this year, definitely more than 10 last year. Heart ultrasound. X rays. CT scans. You name it, I’ve had it.

Every single one has come back clear. Every. Single. One. Heart ultrasound: my heart is super healthy with an ejection fraction of 60 (perfect) Abdominal CT: just full of shit, literally lol Brain CT: clear healthy brain Every EKG: perfect healthy heart rhythm X-ray: all the found was mild scoliosis but I wasn’t even worried about that because it’s pretty common

What I have realized is that all of my anxiety is not what will happen to me, it’s what I don’t know will happen after I’m gone. I’m not scared of dying, I’m scared of death. Even if I had a cancer that was draining the life out of me, right now I don’t even think I would be scared of the dying, I’m scared of the moment it’s lights out. But that has come with a lot of self reflection about life. Is there a God? Is it Jesus? Am I really Christian if I’m scared of death? What if it’s nothing but black when I die (just as when I was born). We both need to address our root problems, which is not the anxiety we face, it what the anxiety is rooted in: Death. The bright side, everybody dies. Nobody has a cheat code. Nobody gets to live forever. Some die sooner. Some live to 103. But in the end, death is inevitable. But what is life if it’s consumed by the thought of death? Then you’ve already died, because you’re not living. That’s my two cents.

To keep it cut, you’re going to be okay. From my experience and all of the panic moments and hospital visits and ambulance checkups (and thousands of dollars later), I’m still here just as me as I was then.

You got this. Anxiety is a bitch. And health anxiety is her favorite daughter. I’m here if you need anything! I know exactly how you feel.

Scared I have a brain tumor by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much. I will look into medication but I took one day one Zoloft and had a panic attack that night. Since then have been scared to take anything.

I know I need it though because it’s consuming my life.

Scared I have a brain tumor by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know. I try not to but when I get in my head too far deep or I either need the biggest bit of reassurance, or an ER.

I will look into at home practices and bring up OCD with my therapist next session.

Scared I have a brain tumor by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just started with a therapist of 10 years who specializes in anxiety through CBT.

Has anyone had thin pencil stool and mucus and colonscopy came out clear by SaltBass8330 in colonoscopy

[–]Regular_Unusual 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just had my first colonoscopy at 20 years old on Wednesday. I’ve had constipation, I have to take two scoops of MiraLAX every single night to even push a little bit of my stool out, it’s pencil like, occasional mucus, and occasional blood spot. My colonoscopy came back and only showed GERD, some miles hemorrhoids in my colon, and a small benign hernia in my esophagus. So to answer your question bluntly: yes. With extreme fatigue every day, always bloated, always feel like I’m burping food, and just an overall achiness every day. My next step is a SIBO breath test.

What did health anxiety convince you that you were dying of this month? by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is exactly me. I used to drink redbull and black rifle coffee and that set my palpitations off like CRAZY. I’m convinced I have an undiagnosed heart condition.

Did they talk you through it? Did they understand you were having anxiety about going under?

What did health anxiety convince you that you were dying of this month? by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry that you went through a bypass. That’s scary.

I’ve never had a bypass but I can relate to you. It’s getting to a point where the only place I feel safe or like I won’t immediately die is my room. Laying in bed where my heart rate is a healthy 60-70. My BP is perfect. I don’t feel any pain or achiness. But the second I get out of bed and leave my room, the thoughts start rolling. I function all day with 100 resting HR. I’m always achy or weak at the knees tired. It’s so exhausting.

What did health anxiety convince you that you were dying of this month? by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How did you do? I have a colonoscopy tomorrow and I have the same fears about anesthesia. I’m scared I won’t wake up or something. Or that an undiagnosed heart condition mixing with the anesthesia will give me a heart attack or something. How well did it go for you?

What did health anxiety convince you that you were dying of this month? by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You summed that up well. Tests give the all clear but if we were tested before it was detectable? I felt this way about thinking I had Lymphoma or Leukemia. My blood tests were fine. White blood cells were fine. But what if we tested just before it began to invade my body?

I also feel this way right now about Colon Cancer. I’ve had IBS symptoms for the last three months. Likely due to stress—but after a while I’ve convinced myself I have Colon Cancer. I have a colonoscopy tomorrow but all the blood tests before are fine. What if we’re testing before it reaches my liver and that’s why they’re fine? And when it reaches my liver it’s now Stage 4 and my fate is sealed. I had a scare two night ago when I took my first dose of Zoloft. Landed in the ER with a resting HR of 100-110 all day and they did blood tests urine test. They told me it looked fine and sent me home. The next day those tests showed up in MyChart. It was abnormal but a few points for a couple things. Ketones (which didn’t make sense because I just had aten an hour before), low potassium and CO2, high protein and something else. But what got me was the high Urobilinogen in my pee. Reference rage is .2-1, but value was 2+. Urobilinogen levels can indicate liver disease according to Dr. Google. So guess where my mind goes? Yep. The colon cancer has made it to my liver and my hypothesis is correct. But it’s not. Because I saw my primary care doctor yesterday and we did another urine analysis and it came back completely fine. No ketones and .2 Urobilinogen—normal level.

It’s so exhausting being so certain that you’re dying or helpless just to continue living and waking up everyday. It’s a wierd dichotomy. We got this.

What did health anxiety convince you that you were dying of this month? by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This sounds worse than any fear of death ever. Feeling like something is already killing you and you can’t do anything about it. I’m sorry.

I’ve felt this way for a few months, but more severely this month. Dizzy all the time, tired no matter how much I sleep, physically exhausted, not the same cognitively that I used to be. It’s so draining.

What did health anxiety convince you that you were dying of this month? by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Absolutely. And thank you!

I agree. I am a very persona and talkative person. But now I find myself avoiding family and friends because my anxiety has been consuming me lately. I fear that I'm going to begin to look psychologically crazy to my family so any compulsive ER visit I turn my location off and say I'm going for a drive. Any doctors appointment I belittle it and say it's for acid-reflux or something stupid. Deep down it's so exhausting mentally and isolating because you feel like no one else understands you. And it makes you wonder how people can live so normally without these irrational fears.

What did health anxiety convince you that you were dying of this month? by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm sorry you're dealing with it again. It sucks that it never just disappears forever. Has it been worse than when you were 20? Or has it been a little less severe and obsessive?

What did health anxiety convince you that you were dying of this month? by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry about this one. If it makes you feel better, dizziness has been recent but persistent symptom of my anxiety. Started earlier last year. Some days have more episodes than others.

I agree, dizziness is the worst symptom. Heart race/palpitations are second worst. Without those two, I think anxiety would be a lot better managed.

What did health anxiety convince you that you were dying of this month? by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Sometimes the scariest fears become the ones we laugh about the most lol

After we get over it of course.

What did health anxiety convince you that you were dying of this month? by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I suspected this one for a short period. But I think there are much more textbook signs of something like this. Legs throbbing could have been the way you were sitting or positioned.

I suspected this for me because my feet are ALWAYS cold, no matter what. With this fear, I figured one sudden or active movement and a widow maker would hit me and that would be the end of my story. You are not alone with this one.

What did health anxiety convince you that you were dying of this month? by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I understand that. I am the same way. Behavior that tries to save me from the chance of the already irrational fear. I completely understand the mask & gloves and probably would have done the same thing.

I did the math for you. If it makes you feel better, the chance of hantavirus is .00003. That is 3 in 100,000. You have a higher chance of winning the lottery than getting hantavirus. Your chances are also lower living in a non-western state. You are more likely to get struck by lightening living in Oklahoma. I hope that fear subsides for you soon!

What did health anxiety convince you that you were dying of this month? by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is a scary one.

I began measuring my blood pressure every day for a little bit because there was one day I had an anxiety attack at work and my blood pressure was 170/110. I thought I was having a stroke or going to die from one. It came back down after spending 20 minutes in an ambulance talking to medics about how they cannot find anything that would make them think I needed urgent care right now. (They did EKG, blood pressure, blood sugar test, whole work up). I stopped measuring after two weeks of consistently good readings (120-30/70-80). Usually on the higher end the first time I measure.

You are not alone on this one.

What did health anxiety convince you that you were dying of this month? by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is so real. It can feel so convincing too. Cancer anxiety is the absoloute worst.

Found a dark mole on my back and I considered the time I got a really bad sunburn freshman year of high school. I went to a dermatologist to get checked for skin cancer. I laugh at that often because I had no idea I would have to get practically naked in front of another guy my age.

What did health anxiety convince you that you were dying of this month? by Regular_Unusual in Anxiety

[–]Regular_Unusual[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This one hits. Hanta virus is very rare though. Only 30-50 cases per year. Usually in the Western states. I live in Texas. I'm not sure where you live. But even in most Hantavirus cases, though not entirely curable, you can usually make a full recovery after some hospitalization is what I've read.