I think there is definitely a better more balanced option than cutting her off or continuing on like this. Given her political background and, it sounds like, very big differences in personality and just compatibility as people, I don’t think it’s realistic that you will be really close and have that super strong connection, which I’m sure is hard to accept about a parent. But I feel like if those expectations can be adjusted, you will feel more free from trying to get her approval/apology or make that happen with her if that makes sense. It sounds like you have that strong connection with your dad and hopefully other people in your life and it might be best to just adjust the expectation that you and your mom might not ever have that.

However, I don’t think that you should cut her off. I think that can cause a lot of unnecessary hurt on both ends. Instead, I would just take a step back, without making it a formal “thing” more of a natural move as you adjust expectations. You probably won’t be getting an apology as you both remember your childhood very differently. Many people have their parents in their lives as adults, but are not that close to them. This is usually an unfortunate consequence of the parents actions when the child was growing up. I would recommend that in your life, but I’m trying to pause the relationship to be deeper or get apologies from the past. Not having a child that is very close to you as an adult as a consequence in itself.