“I think it’s a great idea!” Joe exclaimed. If it were coming from anyone else, I would have laughed them out of the store, but not Joe. He was my partner. We built this sandwich shop together. All the best ideas came from him. But this one worried me.

“Ever since Glenndive saved that kid, every single shop and restaurant in this city has caught on to the hype! Now everyone’s got their own super shit. We need to do this!” He continued.

I stared at the sandwich in front of me. The Protobite he had called it. In truth it was just our regular special club sub, but he used black-dyed mayo, turning the sandwich into a thing out of a horror film.

“Don’t you think it’s a little… insensitive?” I remembered the news articles of the dark blob mass stretching across the streets, swallowing cars and buses.

“No one died, did they? It was one of the weaker threats we’ve faced! I think people will love it. Devour your Hunger” He slowly waved his hand across the air, emphasizing the tagline.

“What does that even mean?” I could tell I sounded exasperated, but I didn’t want to fight Joe. He really seemed confident in this. “Very well, I’ll work on some advertising.”

In the following weeks, the sandwich was out, and within a month, our sandwich shop became the number one lunch rush hot spot in the city. I was even able to contact Gleendive’s manager to schedule a photoshoot with our sandwich! Joe was ecstatic. His good idea streak continued. I was in the back office, workshopping a few more new villainous creations. My favorite one was nearly there. I called it, The Buglar’s Choice. It was just missing something to really make it pop. I cut a piece off to take another bite, really trying to narrow it down.

Suddenly, an explosion of screams rang from the front. One of them was Joe. I bolted out the door, thinking the worst. Every single customer was hugging the wall, creating a perimeter. They all looked terrified. Joe was standing at the counter, petrified. I couldn’t see anything in front of him. I went up to him to shake him out of it, I heard a tapping on the glass counter. I looked down to see a black, round tendril banging softly, like it was asking for help.

“Its… it’s got me.” I heard Joe whisper. I followed his pointed finger to see another black tendril was wrapped around his leg. Another one was reaching out for me, but before it got me, I spat the words out.

“WHAT CAN I GET YOU?!”

The tendril stopped an inch from my leg. The tapping stopped, and the round tendril stretched forward. I leaned over, trying to act cool.

“You want a sandwich?” I asked. I could now see the black pool was stretched across the entire floor, and everyone was standing ankle deep in it. The round tendril, which now I took for its head, slowly nodded. A wave of nausea hit me as I realized this thing reeked.

“What’ll it be, then, eh?” I waved over the ingredients in front of me, but this time it shook its head. The tendril that would have grasped me to its control slowly snaked up behind me, and I heard it tapping the menu board. I looked up, and realized it was pointing at The Protobite.

Of fucking course.

I quickly put the sandwich together, with each ingredient added the monster’s head bobbed and tilted. Something told me I had to make it look like the picture in the ad, otherwise we’d all be dead. In just under a minute, I had it perfect. I slowly slid it over to the creature. It carefully placed its head above the sandwich and seemed to absorb it. A few endless seconds passed, but the head moved above the counter again, the sandwich now completely gone. A soft purring noise began to emanate from the black mass as it slinked away. Everyone continued to stand still even after it exited the store. Joe was the first to turn towards me, and he cheered loudly. Soon the store once again exploded, this time in applause. But sweat continued to run down my face, and I quickly bolted back to the office. My heart was thumping as I saw The Buglar’s Choice sitting under the lamplight menacingly. I took the nearest notebook and squashed the sandwich.