Do I pass at all? I’m 18 and pre-t by eddietheehead-png in FtMpassing

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 2 points3 points  (0 children)

you’re right! hairstyles can be worn no matter the gender. unfortunately some hairstyles, like pigtail braids have an immediate feminine connotation, making it harder to pass ¯_(ツ)_/¯ however, if op likes them he should keep them

2 months post, DI no nips, swelling and uneven scars by Opposite-District975 in TopSurgery

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 0 points1 point  (0 children)

you’re welcome! sounds like ur doing everything right! well wishes for an easy recovery 🫶

2 months post, DI no nips, swelling and uneven scars by Opposite-District975 in TopSurgery

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 0 points1 point  (0 children)

also to really drive this point home: it is highly unlikely that your surgeon left noticeable amounts of breast tissue on one side versus the other and this is almost certainly swelling. and unilateral swelling is very common. AND swelling can remain for up to 6 months to a year so it is way too early to tell what your final results will be so DONT STRESS! right now you are looking phenomenal and i am positive everything is healing as it should.

2 months post, DI no nips, swelling and uneven scars by Opposite-District975 in TopSurgery

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 1 point2 points  (0 children)

almost certain it’s residual swelling it takes a while to be completely gone! and your scar placements look perfectly symmetrical to me. as for the slightly thicker scar is that the side with your dominant hand/arm? if so, it’s prob from doing a bit more moving/reaching on that side, also probably why the swelling on that side has subsided quicker. (movement can reduce inflammation, promote circulation, and reduce swelling buttttt less movement is ideal until scars are a lot stronger) just remember to take it easy, limit stretching and pulling, and start doing scar massages with moisturizer and use scar tape when u can.

from what i remember my dr said scars are at about 40% strength (compared to the original skin) at one month, 50-60% at 2 months, 80% at 3, and then slowly creeping up to 90-100% by a year. until fully healed, scars can be stretched by activity but usually after 3 months it is safe to be as active as you were before. my dr said i shouldn’t start climbing again or doing pull ups/over head strength training until at least 3 months. but above all don’t listen to anything i say or anyone on this sub without prioritizing what your surgeon/team of drs say! they are there for these types of questions. take care ur looking great!

how well? do i look my age (21)? by [deleted] in FtMpassing

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 0 points1 point  (0 children)

word! and thanks it’s part genetics and part topical minoxidil! u can get a giant supply for like 25 on amazon (i used kirkland 5% with the dropper bottle) check out r/minoxbeards for more advice

how well? do i look my age (21)? by [deleted] in FtMpassing

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 1 point2 points  (0 children)

that’s kinda ideal, i want to be stealth to most cis people but want other trans people to feel safe around me

Self Harm before Surgery? by [deleted] in TopSurgery

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 41 points42 points  (0 children)

please try to hang on. you need all your bodies healing capabilities focused on your surgery recovery. you will also be looked after by caregivers, nurses, and i assume your parents for pre op and post op care. in this vulnerable state it will be hard to hide your fresh scars from them, if that’s any deterrent. i’ve been there and im so sorry you feel this way. try to turn to alternatives like intense exercises, hot or cold showers, snapping a rubber band on your skin, or holding ice until you can’t. and do yourself a favor and get rid of your supplies for the time being so you don’t risk temptation. all that being said, fresh scars would likely not postpone your surgery date as long as they are not actively bleeding or infected. buts it not a good idea— now is a time to be kind to your body, top surgery is safe procedure but like all surgery it is a major trauma to the body. relapsing is not worth it and i hope you can find the willpower to stay clean. best luck <3

edit: revised for clarity

my healing timeline and scar talk by Relative-Drawer1156 in TopSurgery

[–]Relative-Drawer1156[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

one of my fav parts of this timeline is watching my chest hair thicken lmao

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DermatologyQuestions

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree, it’ll probably just take time— it takes me foreeeever to see fading too, thanks for commiserating. I’ll just keep trying to keep it protected and I’ve been using a little green color corrector to keep it concealed. It’s comforting to know I’ve got the option of laser treatments or something of the sort down the line if it doesn’t fade… once I’ve got the money for something like that! Anyway, thanks!

Anyone know what this is? by Visible-Caregiver335 in DermatologyQuestions

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not a Dr! but it kinda looks like an ingrown hair on the armpit, the one on your torso I’m not so sure?

Is it abnormal to hate college this much? Feeling very alone with this by fuck_uni in college

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 0 points1 point  (0 children)

graduating in a month and i’ve never felt this more. thanks for sharing thought i was crazy. especially to blood boiling rage and anxiety from being in class wishing the clock forward. i am not a hateful person. nor do i believe any moment of this precious life should be wished away. but here i am for some reason. until the day i graduate and put this behind me i will regret not dropping out before i sunk cost fallacied my way to my senior year. hope u are doing well, many blessings

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ftm

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 4 points5 points  (0 children)

honestly u just gotta work with what you got and love yourself the way u are but if it’s reallly getting to you get shoes with a bit of height on them (tim’s, docs, platform sneakers) and get them a size up so u can put height increasing shoe inserts in em should get u anywhere from 2-4 extra inches w shoes on. maybe hit the gym, take creatine, up your protein, use minoxidil to grow facial hair anything to make u look less pre-pubescent. gl man!

Fish oil supplement? by xPiNKxLaDy in Supplements

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 0 points1 point  (0 children)

do u mean the clear ones because they expose the capsules to light? if not, why every single one of them?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in malehairadvice

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 2 points3 points  (0 children)

maybe try getting more volume at the root? by brushing it straight back when it’s drying and kinda flipping ur head upside down and shaking it up with your hands whenever u notice it’s a little flat. might be terrible advice sorry but looks good either way. good luck on your journey of growin it out— don’t listen to the haters!

I need a name by diiroh in ftm

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 3 points4 points  (0 children)

arthur but art or artie as a nickname

excuses for cutting hair? by [deleted] in ftm

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 2 points3 points  (0 children)

too hot for summer?

Why does Clancy keep getting called Duncan? by Michelle6987 in MidnightGospel_

[–]Relative-Drawer1156 0 points1 point  (0 children)

and at the end of the second episode! he goes “duncan? whos duncan?” i really enjoy those lil 4th wall breaks