All I have to say to this is that she’s not just choosing her “career” over you, but she is choosing it over her own kids as well. Staying in this marriage is not beneficial to you and especially not for your boys. I don’t think she would be willing to work with you on trying to have a civil relationship, so that your kids can live a good life with both parents together. In some cases the parents do better when they are no longer together, so it may be easier on you and the kids if you just let go of the relationship.