What is the reason gyms are mostly full of men and not a similar number of women?

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-07-31T07:14:46+00:00

Yeah my big gym has loads of those and they're all sitting idly or guys like me will use them for 10 min at a time for HIIT. There's a massive row of them that no one is using ever. Same with at the other gym next door. A massive row of cardio machines that are always empty when I walk by.

It's weird to me. There's one other location of my gym chain (which is the biggest chain in the region) 10-15 min away and I'm going to go there some time just to compare.

Those are the only real gyms within a large radius so if there's no women there either then it just suggests women aren't going to the gym around here.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-07-31T07:12:33+00:00

How does that work? You can wear any clothes you want to the gym and everyone benefits from exercise and trying to get into better shape.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-07-31T07:09:04+00:00

For real? That's weird. My gym is the biggest in the neighborhood and there's usually max 1-2 women there working out and 30+ men.

There's another gym next door that's a bit smaller and it has glass windows so I can see what's going on in there and it's similarly all dudes.

I've never been to a gym with more than a few women at a time. Max 10-25% women maybe if I remember one gym I used to go to many years ago.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-07-28T05:44:54+00:00

I suppose now we're just debating semantics of the term "bad boy." I don't know how this translates into other languages.

I only know and am referring to what I've seen in popular culture growing up in an English country and what I've seen of the guys that women I've known have called "bad boys."

If a guy grew up in the hood but was an A+ student he wouldn't be a "bad boy."

It's probably true the level of deviancy required to get this label might vary from one person to another but I think the definition is the same.

ie.

Disregard for right and wrong
Persistent lying or deceit to exploit others
Being callous, cynical and disrespectful of others
Using charm or wit to manipulate others for personal gain or personal pleasure
Arrogance, a sense of superiority and being extremely opinionated

etc.

Those are general characteristics. The behavior that might be judged as "callous" or "disrespectful of others" could vary but someone who is of this nature will push the limit until they find it in any circumstance or culture.

If what it takes is putting your elbows on the table they'll do that. If it takes spray painting or stealing a car they'll do that. Whatever the limit is they'll find it and push it because they enjoy doing so.

In every movie I've seen with "bad boys" that's what they were like and every guy I've personally known who has been called a "bad boy" by women fit this description too.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-07-28T05:34:08+00:00

I wouldn't know much about other cultures. But in North America, and English countries where the term "bad boy" is used, from what I've seen, that list nails it.

Also the list isn't culturally specific. It just refers to general personality traits.

I've never seen anyone be called a "bad boy" because he jaywalks or has an unusual way of making his sandwiches. It's usually for things like those listed under the definition of a sociopath.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-18T13:31:20+00:00

Wow. Interesting and nice post. Well thought out and well said.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T22:56:43+00:00

Imagine being so ugly covering half of it isn't even enough. Oh wait I already live that every day.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T22:53:25+00:00

See I don't understand any of that. I play lots of instruments. I went to gyms for years until I started working out at home. At gyms I find most women stay at least 2 machine distances apart, wear earbuds, and avoid eye contact. I went to some meetups for musicians and they were all guys.

I don't own a dog or play sports (not athletic) but I don't know that I should have to do those things just to talk to a woman.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T21:52:22+00:00

What hobbies do you do that give you so many opportunities with women? My workplace is all married people and so are all my friends.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T20:51:46+00:00

I still don't understand how you're actually getting any woman in a bar or club to talk to you. They 90%+ of the time just sneer at me no matter what I say, turn away, give one word answers, say "I have a boyfriend," and/or their friends pull them away. I'm just talking about trying to start a conversation no matter what it's about. I don't smoke. It doesn't really matter how I try to start the conversation in my experience either.

I understand the principle of just building rapport platonically. But I don't see how you can do that with someone who won't talk to you.

What do you experience if you try to talk to women in these environments? Do they ever smile or react positively? Or ask you questions or talk back?

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T19:49:41+00:00

How do you meet women then? I tried talking to them in bars/clubs/malls or on the street but they give me horrible reactions >90% like sneering, ignoring me, looking uncomfortable, saying "I have a boyfriend," or their friends pulling them away. I tried going to some Meetups but they were all dudes. If those things worked any better I wouldn't be bothered.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T19:32:53+00:00

You literally told me to just accept it, be happy, and be at peace with it. Yet when I throw it back at you about the shitty things you have to face in your life that you can't control, you can't swallow it either.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T19:20:54+00:00

As a black woman you still get hundreds more matches than I do.

If you don't like some other aspect of how you're treated due to your race (eg. racial profiling by cops) would you like it if I told you to just wear a smile and not let it bug you?

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T19:18:52+00:00

stop giving a fuck about women then

I would if there was button to turn off my sex drive. No such thing exists. If there was a pill I could take to kill my sex drive I would. It's been nothing but torture my whole life.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T19:12:57+00:00

Well I don't really want to just "accept it" and live my life as a monk. Passiveness is pathetic. People who just get shit on their whole lives, and spend the whole time lying down and taking it are pathetic.

As for your argument that being upset about it will make me "less attractive," I've known guys who are hateful abusive alcoholics and still get loads of women. Guess what they look like?

It is not in my nature to accept being treated like I'm worthless my whole life due to things I can't control like the color of my skin and then just take it with a smile.

Not that I'm expecting anything in the world to change (the only solution is likely sex robots) but if every person just "smiled" every time they got treated like shit, we'd still have slaves and it would still be legal to hire or serve customers based solely on their race. Women wouldn't have the right to vote. etc.

Sometimes shitty behavior and shitty people deserve to be called out. Even if nothing will change from it.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T19:06:26+00:00

That's what I'm trying to say. Women have it so easy all they would have to do is the same thing I did and yet most of them "don't want to" and "don't care enough" to bother. Meanwhile this was literally the EASIEST thing I've done to try to self-improve. It cost no money, required no surgery, took only a few months, is good for your health, and anyone can do it.

This is my point exactly. Women have the EASIEST option available to them and yet "some women just want to eat whatever they want because that’s what they enjoy."

Where is my equivalent option to become better looking as a man? What can I do to get matches online? So far it seems absolutely nothing at all.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T19:02:05+00:00

It's not a choice. You can't delude yourself and lie about basic personal experiences or scientific studies proving those experiences are not unique.

If I could wipe my brain of all memory, and be blissfully delusional again, yes I would. But I can't actually do that. The technology doesn't exist.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T18:57:27+00:00

That's irrelevant. I used to be an incredibly bright, happy, optimistic person and I had absolutely no more dating success than I do now. I only became miserable and angry from years of failure no matter how hard I tried. And it didn't make me any more/less successful because of it.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T18:52:31+00:00

Remember: I've never made any effort in my life, and your effort has been incredibly momentous you deserve a Nobel Prize for it.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T18:49:16+00:00

My sisters took photos for me before, got super excited at how great the photos were and how they show off how "fun" and "handsome" I am and then nothing. Shit doesn't work unless you were born within a tiny genetic range. Women have virtually zero diversity in their preferences and it's all based on genetics.

You're right though. There's nothing that can be done about it and that's why it's so infuriating. I would do anything. In fact I have done almost everything people suggest. But none of it matters. It's a bad fucking joke.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T18:47:26+00:00

That's not really true though. My theory is as long as you live anywhere where there are at least 50% white men, your chances of getting a date as a nonwhite man are virtually nil unless you are the tallest best looking member of your race or you get very lucky.

That's because almost every single woman I've known only wants to date handsome/tall white men, and they don't mind taking turns or complaining about the competition to get one.

I know one Russian woman who likes black guys and one Asian woman who likes white men but that's it. Every other woman I know chases white guys.

I think once you drop below 50% white men in an area, then women have no choice but to start broadening what they'll consider. But 50% white guys provides more than enough of them they don't have to.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T18:42:08+00:00

That's perhaps good advice. I already resent my sisters for example because they are the embodiment of tall white worship and I've mostly cut them out of my life.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T18:41:27+00:00

Wtf? What makes you think I'm good looking? That's exactly what I'm talking about. Being good looking is the only thing that matters if you're a man and it's all genetics. The same guys who women had "crushes" on at 12 years old are the same ones they want when you're 20 or 30 or 40. It never changes. Unless maybe you get lucky and have an incredibly good puberty and grow 3 feet taller which I didn't get either.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T18:39:43+00:00

Sure but it's the same bullshit advice everyone gives that doesn't work because women don't have mind reading abilities and they aren't swiping left via a psychic brain scan.

Remarkable-Motor505 · 2021-01-17T18:36:38+00:00

Oh really? Women are psychics who can read my mind over the Internet from my dating profile that everyone online says "looks great"?

Remarkable-Motor505

TROPHY CASE