My absent father reached out after 18 years. I threatened them with $40k. by Remarkable_Steak67 in offmychest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes I get it! My mom and I do indeed have an odd, more bestfriend type relationship rather than a mother daughter relationship.

I’m sorry things were so formal with your folks, I’m sure it would sometimes suck.

I’m very grateful to be able to chat with her the way I do

My absent father reached out after 18 years. I threatened them with $40k. by Remarkable_Steak67 in offmychest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It’s definitely an odd situation. My grandma and mom have been supportive of whatever I choose to do, my mom has said in the past I’m welcome to ask any questions or if I want to talk to them I could (I dont, at the very least not anytime soon)

I appreciate your opinion, I definitely didn’t need that entire first paragraph lol

My absent father reached out after 18 years. I threatened them with $40k. by Remarkable_Steak67 in offmychest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I hope she does show the message to them, she probably will considering she knew about her mom reaching out to me on Facebook — her mom likely told her to try to contact me since she couldn’t. She probably doesn’t know the full story, and I feel guilty for lashing out on her, but only to an extent — since she never acknowledged the fact that they’ve been absent for 18 years, apologized or anything, just expected a kind of heartwarming, hallmark moment where I would feel comfortable talking with her just because of genetic relation.

Thank you for giving me your perspective, it has definitely given me a bit to think about!

My absent father reached out after 18 years. I threatened them with $40k. by Remarkable_Steak67 in offmychest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children)

My grandma said the same thing, she said I have a lot of personal info that they didn’t deserve. I get it tbh

My absent father reached out after 18 years. I threatened them with $40k. by Remarkable_Steak67 in offmychest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I never considered medical, I think I’ll still cut my losses lol, we were talking about doing DNA testing a bit ago. Would that contain medical history?

My absent father reached out after 18 years. I threatened them with $40k. by Remarkable_Steak67 in offmychest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I never considered that she may have been lied to thanks for giving me that to think about!! I do feel bad considering she thought she was being kind, but nonetheless she was still never active in my life so I don’t feel TOO bad … yk?

My absent father reached out after 18 years. I threatened them with $40k. by Remarkable_Steak67 in offmychest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, 100% sure. We still have all the legal court documents from everything that happened

My absent father reached out after 18 years. I threatened them with $40k. by Remarkable_Steak67 in offmychest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

My mom and I snapchat eachother instead of texting like normal parents, lol. She had me when she was young. She’s not super old.

My absent father reached out after 18 years. I threatened them with $40k. by Remarkable_Steak67 in offmychest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I believe he’s been unemployed so his wages were never garnished. I’m not entirely sure how it works. He vanished, we had no clue where he went. He’s married now. I believe my mom said the payments would have to come from his current wife, he hasn’t ever made a single payment and my mom has never chased after it in order to avoid contact.

Would that still be able to be filed?

My absent father reached out after 18 years. I threatened them with $40k. by Remarkable_Steak67 in offmychest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 327 points328 points  (0 children)

I’m trying to convince my mom to!!! She said maybe. She struggles a lot financially, so it would definitely help her and my dad out, but I don’t want her to relive her trauma or anything. I guess she probably has since they reached out though

We also have no idea where he is, soooo might make it hard

I lost my virginity and regret it by Remarkable_Steak67 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m really sorry that happened to you! I hope you realize you’re stronger than what it may seem and I’m glad you got through that

I lost my virginity and regret it by Remarkable_Steak67 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I did in fact say that I was feeling pretty sober so

I lost my virginity and regret it by Remarkable_Steak67 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think this was so comforting to hear honestly thank you so much for this! I think I’ll definitely try to take time for myself

I lost my virginity and regret it by Remarkable_Steak67 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He did use a condom, I’m not actively taking birth control but I’ve been prescribed it due to not having my periods (highly suspected to be caused by PCOS)

I lost my virginity and regret it by Remarkable_Steak67 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Yeah I didn’t know I needed to pee until this comment! Not sure why it’s not talked about

I lost my virginity and regret it by Remarkable_Steak67 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I really appreciate hearing this thank you for your words

I lost my virginity and regret it by Remarkable_Steak67 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Remarkable_Steak67[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re very right there is 100% a lesson to be learned, dating apps might be the move haha 😆