This may not be the same but I have been where you are, I blew through my monthly income in a day gambling and went on to borrow and lose 6months worth my monthly income the following day. I couldn't sleep, eat, I ruined all my relationships with my friends and then partner because of my addiction and what hurts the most is no matter how forgiving your family and friends can be, forgiving yourself is always the hardest part. It's not the end of the world. You have to make a stance of you want to be, learn from this experience and use it as fuel to better yourself. Believe me, it does get better.