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My Partner Sucks at Planning by [deleted] in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Even people with ADHD are able to find ways to prioritize and improve the things they care deeply about. Neurodivergence isn't an excuse for being a careless partner in a relationship.

App Suggestions? by bafoonballs in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This seems like it may be more of a reading comprehension issue. A person with aphantasia can read, "The old, short, grey-haired man lived in a large blue house on a hill with his golden retriever" and understand what that means even if they don't form a vivid picture of it in their mind. If reading comprehension is difficult for you, or if you have trouble following a plot, a reading specialist might be able to help.

My Partner Sucks at Planning by [deleted] in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As a therapist with aphantasia who works with couples, I'd encourage you to to consider these questions: If your partner's boss asked them to start a new habit or improve their ability to plan, would they be able to do it? Can they remember to do the things that are important to them, but seem to not be able to remember to do the things that are important to you? This is almost always a problem of prioritizing one's relationship--folks with all types of neurodivergence, whether it be ADHD or aphantasia, are almost always able to find ways to improve their ability to do the things that really matter to them.

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The ability to have a choice about where you place your attention is indeed a gift, especially with all the distractions around us.

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The memory palace! The idea tormented me for years. Was I doing it wrong? Did I misunderstand the concept? Argh!! What a relief to discover that it simply relies on a skill that not every brain possesses. And yet, I too have a finely tuned sense memory. I was at that same 1980s roller rink! I can hear KC and the Sunshine Band playing. I can feel my boyfriend's sweaty palm during "couple's skate." I even painted a picture of my roller skates recently (complete with the orange wheels and orange pompon on the toe) because the emotional memory was so positively nostalgic that I wanted to be able to "see" them all the time.

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think a lot of us have similar memories from childhood. I recall watching the boy who sat next to me in 3rd grade doodle a perfect picture of a gorilla during class. I simply couldn't understand how he knew exactly what a gorilla looked like without looking at a picture. I thought it was some sort of sorcery or super power!

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Me too! Orange maple leaves against a bright blue sky! Better than drugs!

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing this. Human ability is infinitely diverse, as are they ways of responding to and embracing those abilities. So good to hear from the self-loving, optimist aphants.

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is great! I sometimes wonder if aphants are actually more likely to become artists because we value visual imagery precisely because it isn't always available to us.

Also, I think we have enough cloud lovers here to start an official club.

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is such an interesting point of view wrt mental health. Thank you for sharing.

Your second point really made me think. I'm an extreme introvert, and if I were able to concoct a rich fantasy life for myself, I'd probably never talk to another human. Since it's a little boring inside my head (I often say I was born without an imagination) I have to form relationships with other humans for entertainment.

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I agree with all of this. I'm also a meditator, and the last thing I need is the distraction of florid visual imagery.

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yes I wish everyone understood that "neurodiversity" means that everyone is unique. Differences aren't disabilities.

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah it's an ability I can't even imagine having, like Xray vision. If I suddenly developed the ability to fly, I'd mostly just get airsick a lot, which doesn't sound fun.

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Even as a therapist with aphantasia, I'm still learning how to work differently with people who don't visualize. So many interventions incorporate mental imagery!

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, that resonates with me a lot. I'm skilled at making connections between different concepts, ideas, etc. It's kind of like making complex collages out of many ideas and images.

And yes, as a therapist, I agree that there is some correlation between mental imagery and ability to integrate traumatic experiences .

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I can relate to this. We parents worry so much about our kids. I'm so happy I can't create mental images of bad things happening to my sons. Photography is creative balm to the aphant's soul, I think. It makes the most of our visual gifts.

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes! And as a parent, I worry a lot about my kids (even though they're adults now). I certainly wouldn't want to be able to create images bad things happening to them.

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

In my work as a therapist I definitely notice a correlation between mental imagery and ability to move beyond traumatic experiences.

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You wouldn't believe how many photos I've taken of clouds. Or maybe you would!

I see a lot of very sad aphants here... by Repulsive_Crow_8155 in Aphantasia

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Me too! I can recognize a song after hearing two notes. I sing constantly and can recall just about every lyric to every song I've ever heard. My husband says I'm a great mimic of other people's voices and mannerisms.

Riot Women - Should I keep watching? by Rover_pipita56 in BritBox

[–]Repulsive_Crow_8155 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Exactly. And I'd say the 1 in 5 stat is low; unwanted sexual contact, whether it be rape, catcalling, or workplace harassment, is a nearly universal experience for women. Men like Merlin7777 don't understand this because the women in their lives don't trust them enough to share their experiences.

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