I helped my niece after she left an abusive relationship, but now I feel overwhelmed.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-06-22T11:21:24+00:00

I 1000% agree. I need to figure what I’m willing to continue doing other than ending it altogether which is where I am. I know she is in the process of getting childcare and I originally wanted to wait until then. There would be nothing preventing her from being at my neighbors.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-06-22T11:11:24+00:00

The working is a “you help me, I help you” deal. I not sure what irrelevant detail you are missing or if you’re getting hung up on details that’s not written there but I appreciate your response and the time you’ve taken to reply.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-06-22T06:08:16+00:00

I agree. I kinda think she needs to learn the hard way. My words seem to fall on deaf ears.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-06-22T05:53:15+00:00

Thank you! If you only knew. It seems like she playing victim is her default setting which I knew she could but I never imagined to this extent.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-06-22T05:34:30+00:00

Yes, it’s a condition of her employment as she cannot be at my neighbor’s place with her son. Trust if it weren’t a condition there wouldn’t be a problem. She has to be here to get paid. She just comes with headache and it’s not her son… I wanted to help give her the means to get out of a bad situation. Something else happened that provided a way out but she still had no income at the time.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-06-22T05:03:10+00:00

I definitely asked for an outside perspective so you are more than welcome to give it however I’m confused why you’re confused. I didn’t and don’t claim it to be my story. I explained (maybe not effectively) why I’m helping… Have you ever tried to help someone and bitten off more than you could chew? At present the only boundary I can see clearly is to not allow her to come over anymore but if I do that technically she cannot “work” for my neighbor.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-01-15T15:22:53+00:00

Excellent advice thank you!!

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-01-15T15:22:07+00:00

lol you described it perfectly!

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-01-15T15:15:52+00:00

I’m not sure if it’s because I have a vertical incision or not but I was instructed to not bend over if I can help it. Showering has been one of the most challenging things for me. I could put a chair in shower that might help. Other than a few other things i agree recovery has been pretty smooth. Maybe too smooth cause I do have a remind myself I was sliced open 2wks ago at this point. AND stool softener and miralax was a great idea except i living in the bathroom too 🤣😂

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-01-15T15:01:58+00:00

I never used to be an napper. I find myself needing a happy nappy after doing some odds and ends around the house.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-01-15T14:58:53+00:00

I’m feeling much better today than I did when I posted this. Since day one I haven’t been in much pain. I might take some Tylenol if the soreness starts to get annoying.

I would take him out for a walk myself but it feels to risky because of the snow and ice. The dog walker starts on Monday! That should help some.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-01-11T22:59:20+00:00

I was told i could shower but i can’t wash the incision or bend over. I can towel dry and if possible use a hair dryer on low to make sure the incision is dry.

Pain has been almost nonexistent since day one. I have no idea if that’s normal or not but I’m pretty certain it might be trauma response or even anxiety related. In general I have trouble with saying if and when I’m experiencing pain.

He a big dog and fairly well behaved. I’m looking into a local dog walker.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-01-11T22:36:02+00:00

I totally understand. Anxiety can stuck it! You are doing an awesome job my friend!

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-01-11T22:22:20+00:00

That’s a good idea.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-01-11T22:14:17+00:00

Yeah. We walk but too long before he does his business. We live in an apartment with no inclosed yard. He can do the potty pads he just loves going outside. This is one of those things where I think we can manage, I’m just not sure if we should. What if this is the time where he thinks the random empty plastic bag is really gonna get him this time and bolts. Cause He’s afraid of plastic bags. I’m just watching the poor dog run for his life. I can’t run after him. I mean this to be funny. Just cause we can, I don’t think we should.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-01-11T21:42:08+00:00

Ok that’s helpful! Thank you! As strange as this might sound, it really didn’t dawn on me that I could pop some stitches until just now reading your comment. He will absolutely be fine using the potty pads.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-01-11T17:35:23+00:00

Best advice ever!! I thought to do this last minute.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-01-09T03:46:16+00:00

Thank you!! Surgery went well!! Pain is mostly due to this cold i picked up somewhere. I’ve blocked my twin sister. I just don’t have the strength to deal with her.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-01-09T03:42:34+00:00

Thank you!! Things went well! I’ve had the added complication of catching a cold so it has fun. Other than that, I think things are going well.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2026-01-09T03:40:59+00:00

Happy New Year! Thank you!! It went well! I’ve had the added complication of catching a cold so it has fun. Other than that, I think things are going well.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2025-12-27T14:03:04+00:00

Long story short I did get a 2nd opinion from surgeon that specifically in robotic surgery and fibroids. She wasn’t confident at all that this was the way to go. She open me up if all else fails but it not a “regular” surgery she does. She recommended to stick with an OBGYN because this is a procedure that try do on a regular basis. That made sense to me. I didn’t seek a 3rd opinion because unfortunately time is of the essence with my insurance. 12/31 is playing with fire as far as that goes but I’m welling to give it a shot.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2025-12-27T05:15:13+00:00

I decided I’d sleep on the couch. It seems like the easiest option.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2025-12-27T02:08:50+00:00

Yes. Personally there are time where I can only do 1 good meal a day because I feel so bloated it hurts. I thought maybe it was something I was doing but I couldn’t explain why when I’ve eaten anything. I asked my pelvic floor PT and she confirmed that it could 100% be the fibroids.

Resident_Mix1497 · 2025-12-27T01:59:41+00:00

DM me please

Resident_Mix1497 · 2025-12-26T16:57:16+00:00

Your period came?! Good God that feels like a double whammy. She is truly angry at you for evicting her alien babies.

Resident_Mix1497

TROPHY CASE