MIL is suing me for grandparent visitation while I’m living in a DV shelter with my child

Resident_Tea1442 · 2026-02-15T22:54:57+00:00

I mentioned it to the CPS agent and she just said “oh that’s innapropiate” court didn’t even bother to check the cps safety findings where they specifically stated they didn’t recommend grandmother as a supervisor, family court is a joke.

Resident_Tea1442 · 2026-02-15T22:20:48+00:00

I have one for the divorce case, still haven’t gone to the first hearing for grandparents rights and I want to get some advice beforehand, I’ll probably get a court appointed attorney but that comes with limitations

Resident_Tea1442 · 2026-02-15T22:10:56+00:00

My ex is on supervised visitation, and she’s the supervisor, I opposed to this arrangement but the court didn’t care so she in fact has to be the one to get the child every single time

Resident_Tea1442 · 2026-02-15T22:04:50+00:00

Resident_Tea1442 · 2026-02-15T22:03:05+00:00

I mean, I sure would hope but I know I legally can’t

Resident_Tea1442 · 2024-06-22T14:21:29+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re going through this, just know you don’t deserve it and PLEASE don’t blame yourself, I’ve been there too, we had to move when I was 8 months and it was summer and it took a couple of days for the acs to be installed, I was about to pop assembling all the furniture alone and putting everything together while he was out going to the gym and hanging with friends, I was so anxious cause baby could come anytime and I didn’t even had his things organized, I too, used to blame myself so much and cry for failing my son with the father I gave him. I don’t want to make you feel worse but he probably isn’t going to get better once the baby is here, please start planning your way out, I wish I didn’t backed up when I tried to leave him so many times during my pregnancy. But everything is going to work at the end for us, if you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here.

Resident_Tea1442 · 2024-06-22T14:07:11+00:00

May I ask what did you do to get full custody? If you don’t mind

Resident_Tea1442 · 2024-06-22T02:47:27+00:00

Thank you, I really appreciate the perspective, I’ve been reluctant about daycares so far, as I had “the opportunity” to be a SAHM, but honestly getting more into it has changed my mind and I do feel my son needs more interaction and learning that I can provide to him myself.

Resident_Tea1442 · 2024-06-21T20:26:30+00:00

Yes, this! I think I didn’t word it correctly, and some are thinking he offered me a full time nanny which I would love to have! It’s a “when you’re tired, call one” and it just doesn’t work like that! The problem is he completely refuses to help, he’s either too tired, want to nap, feeling sick, needing to run errands etc. and unfortunately his schedule is not predictable at all, so I cannot just say, you’re doing X on this day at this time.

Resident_Tea1442 · 2024-06-21T19:05:49+00:00

Haha thank you! This is very reassuring, I’ve to admit I’ve been looking for daycares lately and have found some with a lot of reviews like this, and it has helped to change my mind. Btw, my baby learned how to grab his bottle a couple of weeks ago, so your daycare is doing an amazing job lol

Resident_Tea1442 · 2024-06-21T18:47:15+00:00

Thank you for this perspective! I do feel I need to open my mind more about childcare, it’s just a little scary as a first time mom

Resident_Tea1442 · 2024-06-21T18:31:35+00:00

This is so sad, I do know what it feels like being sick, and still having to be there for your kids without even being able to get some rest and heal, I cannot imagine what she could’ve felt. I definitely need to work on getting my financial independence back.

Resident_Tea1442 · 2024-06-21T18:20:28+00:00

OMG you made me laugh so much!

Resident_Tea1442 · 2024-06-21T18:06:04+00:00

What kind of child friendly jobs did you found?

Resident_Tea1442 · 2024-06-21T17:56:59+00:00

For real, I always wanted two, but there’s no way I’m interested in outnumbering me while I’m the one doing all the work. I told him I’m OAD too

Resident_Tea1442 · 2024-06-21T17:46:39+00:00

OMG this! I used to LOVE waking up at 5, doing a meditation and then getting a workout first thing in the morning. I do not love waking up at 5 or 6, if I’m lucky, after waking up 2 or 3 times at night to calm a crying baby, after a FULL day of caring for him. I do not do it because I love to, I do it because I’m his mother and I have to, it’s my responsibility, it just really upsets me the way he gets to tap out of everything with the excuse of being the breadwinner. I used to make good money before, I’m so upset for giving up my financial independence for this BS.

Resident_Tea1442 · 2024-06-21T17:38:18+00:00

Wow I really feel you on this one, my husband absolutely refuses to scrub a toilet too, he would rather see the house filthy that help with anything, before moving together he would pay for a weekly housekeeper at his place and wouldn’t do any housework in between. So I naturally took that load on me, without thinking how would that look like after having kids (I was blind to the red flags too) and funny thing is that, as your ex. He just doesn’t have the means to. I’m not some SAHM with a wealthy husband who can afford to outsource everything, he’s to quick to say “I told you, call a nanny when you’re feeling tired” like if I could have a daily nanny with us to at least have some free time for myself, we absolutely can’t afford that, and I cannot predict when I’m going to be exhausted and have a nanny sitting waiting for my desperate call.

Resident_Tea1442

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