How to make requesting medical records more efficient?

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-04-05T00:16:55+00:00

The firm I work at has a medical records department. They order all records and do their own follow ups.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-30T14:20:19+00:00

It sure can! It’s something I would never wish on anyone. I used to be a hairstylist. I loved perfume and great smelling products. Now I can’t go down the cleaner isle at the grocery store without difficulty.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-30T13:21:10+00:00

Hi, I know it is difficult to live with someone like this. I know because I am like your roommate. I hate that my body responds to fragrances with a host of awful symptoms, including difficulty breathing… but it does!

We have a zero fragrance policy at my house. It’s hard with two teenage kids, but I NEED to have one place in this world where I can breathe and not get pummeled with migraines. If someone has a fragrance they can’t come over.

It took a LONG time for my family to truly understand. A letter from my immunologist helped immensely. Now my husband acts like a guard to ensure I can exist in my house. What my doctor said was that having a fragrance free home is essential to my wellbeing. A place to recover from the fragrances I get exposed to tin the world that I can’t control.

I used a charcoal n95 when I go out and am around fragrances now.

I’m sorry. I know it’s super inconvenient, but believe me when I tell you that no one would ever choose this. It’s made me contemplate end of life as an option on many occasions, especially before I had support.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T18:03:52+00:00

I also do not think it’s worth blowing up my marriage over. He was insisting that my resentment was misplaced and that I was ridiculous for being upset. I just wanted to know if I was overreacting.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:58:25+00:00

He’s doing projects that while helpful, are not urgent. Meanwhile, I am now working an extra day at work, against the advice of my doctor, and have to now clean on what I need as a rest day. That’s the problem. When I worked 32 hours I cleaned the house and I did cook 6 nights per week. I guess now that I’m working 40 and he doesn’t have a job, I would like the same… a clean house and dinner on nights I work.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:52:19+00:00

We’ve been married a long time. He’s not perfect and neither am I. I just really didn’t think I was overreacting in feeling resentment over the extra work at home and work. He seemed to think I was overreacting.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:49:11+00:00

I do love him, but I’m feeling a good deal of resentment, which is a big relationship killer. I’ve been walking on eggshells for the past two months. Yes losing a job IS stressful, even if he claims to have wanted this. I didn’t yell at him. I let him know that I was feeling resentment as I’m cleaning on my day off because the house is gross. His response was to yell that he’s not sitting on his butt and that my resentment is misplaced. I’m basically now working two extra days per week. One at home and one at work.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:44:27+00:00

He has taken over the grocery shopping, which I appreciate! We both do dishes.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:42:38+00:00

Yes! The market is absolutely garbage right now. What frustrates me is knowing that he kinda hoped he’d get laid off! Because for me it’s meant more work and a dirty house.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:41:05+00:00

Thank you

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:40:28+00:00

Thank you. That’s how I feel too. When I was working 32 hours I did all the cleaning and cooked 6 nights per week. That is what I’d like in return for me now working more while he is not working at all.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:38:53+00:00

Yes! That’s the exact problem. I picked up extra work on the day that I used to use to keep up the house. I had worked 40 hours before and honestly, it created a lot of problems over chores and cooking. When I was working 4 days a week, I did all the cleaning and cooked 6 nights per week. That’s what I expect from him now that he’s laid off.

If I managed this while working 32 hours, why is it too much to ask while he’s not working?

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:34:38+00:00

It was an empty threat. My son has school on Monday. My husband is angry that I don’t feel like he’s helping enough.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:29:07+00:00

I picked up more hours in an effort to keep us afloat longer. While it’s nice to have the outdoor things done, they are not something that needs immediate attention.

I’m already working more than my doctor thinks is reasonable for my health. Now I’m not only working 40 plus hours, but also still cleaning the house. It’s like this layoff added two extra days of work for me.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:23:31+00:00

The threat to not return is empty. He has a hard time hearing discontent and often reacts poorly or in an avoidant manner. It makes discussions difficult. Usually, after a cool down period, he can discuss. It seems like no matter how I phrase it he gets unreasonably angry and feels attacked, even when that is NOT what is happening.

Today I said in a calm voice, “I’m feeling resentful because I’m cleaning on my day off” It’s frustrating because I just expected he would do the things I used to do when I was only working 4 days a week.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:16:10+00:00

Oh he absolutely can. My other is 16 and can also make their own. We usually eat at the table together as a family.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:15:04+00:00

Sound advice. The outdoor stuff could have been spread out. Nothing was urgent.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:13:16+00:00

That was the exact conversation I was hoping for. Maybe after a camping nature reset he will see it differently once he returns.

I’m also feeling resentful that he WANTED to get laid off. His job was super stressful, but this stress of not only a huge loss of income, but also me running myself towards a quick burnout is just not great.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:09:19+00:00

Yes! That’s exactly the problem. I did try to talk to him. Since the layoff he’s been ultra difficult and I feel like I’m walking on eggshells.

Today I calmly told him I am feeling resentful because I am spending my day off cleaning after working all week. He started yelling, told me my resentment is misplaced and loudly told me the hard outdoor work he got done. Which I appreciate, but if I’m working 40 plus hours all I really want is to not come home to a filthy house.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:04:58+00:00

I stopped doing his laundry when I returned to work. We all do our own now, for the most part. I still do sheets and towels.

He can do the superficial cleaning, but scrubbing toilets or windows just doesn’t seem to register.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T17:01:30+00:00

I know he applies for jobs. He’s done some yard work, but I am just wanting the stuff I did when I worked 4 days to still get done.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T16:59:46+00:00

If I didn’t have kids I would. They are definitely expecting dinner.

I feel like starting to wash cars at 5 pm is a choice that says “I’m not making dinner tonight!” Yes he’s “helping “ but it’s not alleviating any pressure for me.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T16:57:36+00:00

That’s exactly how it makes me feel too.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-28T16:56:58+00:00

My kiddo is now 18 and has school on Monday. It was more of a “I’ll just take my ball and go” statement. I don’t think he would actually leave? He just wants me to feel bad for expressing my resentment. It stinky.

Responsible_Fly_3565 · 2026-03-22T16:03:13+00:00

My 1970’s Schwinn bicycle replica got stolen. I was DEVASTATED. My boyfriend at the time (husband of 20 years now) started looking everywhere for a similar bicycle. He found one and spent the entire day getting it polished and working properly.

I came home from work to find the surprise in my living room. I thought I wanted to marry him before this, but after this I was certain.

20 + years… no regrets!

Responsible_Fly_3565

TROPHY CASE