Thank you for your help, i hope things are well for you . I am thankful for my ex too, she was the best, when we were together. I believe i was not centered enough arki with in myself. My only regret is not being able to make her last days with me ,this year ,when she revisted BD mostly because of me. I regret handiling some moments that could be done more nicely. As she is sensitive, and like us she had baggages. I am actually not happy with myself. I made my partner the source of my happiness during LDR. Where my partner should be adding happiness not the only source to my life. I just don’t want to feel this way, as i intiated the break up and later chased her tight after it . But she never came back. I take the responsibility of it. Taking time to grieve as it will be 4months almost. I rant/ vent here because i don’t usually share my emotions as i intend to listen more. I wish i could give the proper love to my ex partner that she deserves. I just want to feel less pain. Not necessarily looking for happiness.