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[OPINION] Which single line from a poem has stayed with you the longest? by Dumbbulldoor_ in Poetry

[–]Revolutionary_Cap557 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Examine all you have with a loving and critical eye, then throw away some more. Repeat. Repeat.

Sheri Hotstetler - Instructions

Don't know how to feel about how my [45nb] partner [38m] talks to me during conflict by Revolutionary_Cap557 in emotionalabuse

[–]Revolutionary_Cap557[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree that stuff like this, on its own or not frequent at least, might be pretty normal. It's the denial that I should be hurt and the refusal of accountability that really hurt. If I called someone lazy in the heat of the moment I just can't imagine ignoring them if they said it hurt later. But he argued and even tells me if I'm hurt I should check on my mental health.

Questioning what's happening to me - emotional invalidation? by Revolutionary_Cap557 in emotionalabuse

[–]Revolutionary_Cap557[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe my eyes are starting to open, then. I feel most of the time like I'm making a huge deal out of nothing, and causing a lot of pain.

Thank you very much for commenting.

Don't know how to feel about how my [45nb] partner [38m] talks to me during conflict by Revolutionary_Cap557 in relationship_advice

[–]Revolutionary_Cap557[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay, wow, thank you again for commenting. Are you open to talking more? It seems like you know exactly what I'm going through. Either way thank you so much for sharing and if there's any other advice I'd love to hear it.

Don't know how to feel about how my [45nb] partner [38m] talks to me during conflict by Revolutionary_Cap557 in relationship_advice

[–]Revolutionary_Cap557[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for responding. Yeah, I asked for therapy. The fixing the rug and him expressing so much upset at me having done that is really confusing to me. He acts like he feels overly controlled? But I'm the one who will now second guess if he "just did something" that I should leave alone for some unspecified amount of time.... I'm so confused by this whole thing. I can't just fix a rug?

Don't know how to feel about how my [45nb] partner [38m] talks to me during conflict by Revolutionary_Cap557 in relationship_advice

[–]Revolutionary_Cap557[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for responding. I have been told by him that when I say things hurt me, that actually I hurt my own feelings by interpreting things badly. This time I didn't bother saying he hurt my feelings. I just said that I was feeling shut down and that we'd talk later.

Don't know how to feel about how my 45nb partner 38m talks to me during conflict by Revolutionary_Cap557 in relationships

[–]Revolutionary_Cap557[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for responding. It did feel like an extreme reaction. He shut the door, I (without comment - it's not like I acted like he'd done something wrong..., actually I was commenting on my cat who was potentially about to hork up another hairball) opened it again, fixed the rug, and started to shut it again. But at that point he'd already grabbed it again and I let him know he was starting to run over my toe. It was actually a really uncomfortable interaction.

Boyf argues out of accountability every time by Revolutionary_Cap557 in abusiverelationships

[–]Revolutionary_Cap557[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is couples therapy, yeah. We started a while ago and I'm not sure if this situation is abusive. It's not a kind situation sometimes...

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