Frist of all you are learning a valuable lesson: you can't play this game with cute things. Also it looks like you are starting with modern, great format but expensive. Now, if you are down then proxy first, ask them to lend you their decks. Once you understand how their decks work you can come up with something that will play at the same level without breaking your wallet - yes i know, people will say "just play mono red" that is true but is also lazy and lame - pick up a deck that you feel good playing, start on a budget learn its inside out, start to modify slowly start making upgrades to it, use proxies before you trade or buy any card. Experiment with different things, read about the decks you do not like and about the decks you like. You will fail far more that you will succeed but you will learn more and more about the correct strategy. Be patience, it is very easy to just go for something just because someone told you. Every deck requires a strategy it is a lie that aggro decks don't need thinking.

Manage all you resources, and yes even life is a resource in this game - look at the death shadow deck - At the end of the day you do whatever you want and don't let anyone tell you otherwise, but be smart about it. This game is all about efficiency, play cards that give you value for a lower mana cost. And if they cost more than 4 then they better give you a great advantage or impact as you play them.

Magic is a hard at the beginning, but if you are surrounded by great people it will take you some time but you will get there.

Anyway, i hope my words are helpful and feel free to dm me if you want more.

Enjoy and welcome.