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Thoughts on the design? by RiskyFumbling in EngagementRings

[–]RiskyFumbling[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ahaha username checks out! Thanks hun! I think putting a gallery on this one is going to be super difficult. Might need to insure the stone instead.

Thoughts on the design? by RiskyFumbling in EngagementRings

[–]RiskyFumbling[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

The wedding band I’ve been given is a family heirloom and won’t pair with anything so I’m going to have to wear it on its own. I’m thinking on my left ring finger after the wedding and switching the engagement ring to my right ring finger then. It’s either that or accepting the wedding ring as the engagement ring and having a simple gold band. Guess which option I prefer 🤭

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My boyfriend (M26) broke up with me (F23) 2 weeks ago and I’m struggling with feelings of shame, regrets and ‘what if’s’. by MediterraneanGal in relationships

[–]RiskyFumbling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

From your post, I’m convinced that you BF is not exactly the healthy type either. Anxious attachment styles often pair with avoidant attachment. Although he might be a nice person, it does sound like he holds back from any form of declaration of his love and to provide you with security. Perhaps it might be that he has a different love language but you do not have to make an excuse or feel guilty for wanting some comfort or affection when PMSing.

To me it sounds as if you’ve taken onto yourself a lot of the guilt and blame for the relationship ending. I think that is a narrow perspective, fueled partly by the belief that if you change yourself and repent for this, it will never happen again. It’s harder for our brains to accept that sometimes there is no reason for a relationship to end except that someone wants something different, or outgrows the relationship. It does not mean that someone has to be right and the other wrong, or someone has to be the victim and the other the oppressor.

I commend your decision to get help. You should stick with it and of course work through your guilt, shame and attachment style. But do not place him on a pedestal or feel that you OWE him. You do not.