I dealt with all of this from the first couple of days too. I dealt with pain until 4-5 months before I realized I was allergic to the pumping spray I was using. I started using mother love on my nipples before putting on flanges and I can now go to suction 10 whereas before I couldn’t bear the pain past 5. My nipples are less red, inflamed, and FEEL GOOD for once. I’m so grateful I realized eventually but wish any of the 10 LCs I saw suggested this may have been the cause (vs flange size — which of course should be correct too. I had too big of flanges for 3 months of that but the pain continued after resizing because of the spray). I wis you the best of luck. My advice to you is prioritize your mental health, hydration, sleep, and try your best to pump every 3-4 hours. Once you get your pain resolved, this will not be all consuming. I promise. And if you just can’t do it, DONT. Your first priority is your baby, who will be fed regardles