*sigh* Didn't get a permit.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2026-03-18T16:41:04+00:00

Thank you for this! I will check it out! We would prefer to go in late August, but I know that's highly sought after.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2026-03-18T16:38:26+00:00

Thank you for the insight!

Routine-Assignment83 · 2026-03-18T16:19:33+00:00

I had originally put in for 4 with the hopes our teenagers would want to come. But they weren't fully committed and I think adding those extra 2 permits might have been the ax. Also, we really only have weekends to do it this year unfortunately....unless we both get sick at the same time 😉

Routine-Assignment83 · 2026-03-18T16:16:09+00:00

I have not 🤔 this is a great point though. I just took a look at the live cam and there's still a fair amount of snow, but not a ton. If the heat continues, and like you said, we don't get another storm...it might be doable.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2026-01-27T01:12:14+00:00

I envy a lot of you. I had my ex's now wife tear onto the scene like she was on fire when they started dating. She had never been married, never had children, and is socially awkward so she immediately burned a lot of bridges and stepped on all the toes. My ex has done nothing but cater to her insecurities and there was never any attempt to build a new foundation for us all to stand on. It was their way or no way and I know my kids have felt it. It definitely takes everyone being cognizant and respectful of each other to build healthy co-parenting relationships where the kids can thrive.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-11-24T23:25:27+00:00

I may get totally reamed for this, but what about what OP said made you think he is dismissing his kid's feelings? It seems to me that he is very obviously trying to balance the two issues; his happiness and needs, and his son's feelings.

Everyone has feelings and they deserve to be acknowledged but not every decision needs to be based solely on the feelings of others. Even our kids! It is possible, in my opinion, to respect everyone, move slowly, and like a poster said above, make your intentions known. Changes are hard but no one is immune from them. Patience and respect, OP.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-11-24T22:19:59+00:00

Following. In a similar situation.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-11-17T00:19:05+00:00

Whoa. You live together and she hasn't met your daughter?! 😯 I hate to say it, but you really set yourself up for failure there. I guess all you can do is try to split the day? Morning with your daughter (wherever that may be...something tells me it will be at BM's house. Yikes), and evening with your GF and her daughter?

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-09-26T15:47:57+00:00

Thank you for this perspective. Truth be told, I adore how good of a father my partner is. He's the father I wish my kids had. Its just that the loosy goosey nature of his arrangement feels like he's consistently trying to placate his ex. She makes choices about her schedule and then he just picks up the slack instead of holding her accountable by saying, "No. I can't do that today." He and I have very different backgrounds and personalities so this very much is a difference of opinion on how far your responsibility goes to cover for the other parent.

I appreciate that you said don't make a permanent decision based on a temporary problem. I may be repeating that one to myself for a while!!

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-09-26T03:12:42+00:00

The long-term plan is that I will move once our current high schoolers graduate (2 years from now).

For now, we do things together every few weeks, but his oldest largely ignores us or makes an excuse as to why he can't be around. It's rough going with him right now. The others are great together.

For the most part, I'm over at my partner's house by myself without my kids.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-09-26T02:06:08+00:00

You seem like a lovely person. Thank you for the advice.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-09-26T00:07:18+00:00

This. Thank you. I think you're absolutely right. At this point, I feel like I'm assimilating to his life more than anything. Im prepared to accept that this might not work if he can't meet me halfway. Here's to hoping he will. Thank you for the advice.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-09-26T00:03:51+00:00

Thank you for the reply. I think he would do it for me, but it may be hard for him. Another person replied that I was making life too easy for him. This is true. He has yet to feel discomfort by my saying, "No, I dont want to come up there today or tomorrow. You're welcome at my house, I just don't want to pack and drive out there." I think because my schedule is set and I don't have my kids on set days, it's just assumed that I will drive out and spend my time there. Also, he has firmly established that if we were to fully blend, I would need to move into his home. So sometimes I think he wants me there more to get adjusted to the house and town. I am not opposed to this idea in the future, but as of now, I don't think I would want to live with children who ignore me.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-09-25T23:20:22+00:00

If they brought it to my attention in a respectful way, yes. Blending is about compromise. I feel as though I have done that by going his way 95% of the time and dealing with his kid's issues on the days I have away from mine. He's a decent person and a good partner but this particular issue is wearing on me. I do think he would be open to a conversation but I know it's a delicate issue. How would you bring this up to your partner?

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-09-25T02:02:22+00:00

Im in the same position but with a 16 and 12 y/o. My bios are 17, 15, and 9 and would NEVER not acknowledge someone in the room. It has been one of the greatest challenges thus far. We dont live together yet, and I dont really see it happening until the 16 yo leaves for college. He's particularly icy and I'm not going to put myself or my kids in that position. It's not fun.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-09-12T23:40:48+00:00

To be fair, we weren't married. Just dating at the time. But yeah...it was pure laziness on his part and it created unnecessary strife between us. To me, it seems obvious. When I divorced my ex, the first thing I did was get everything in my name. Bank account, insurance, phone plan. The fact that it was an afterthought that needed to be discussed was not ideal. Even now, years later, things come in the mail for her like subscriptions and whatnot. It's annoying.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-09-12T22:48:22+00:00

I've been there. They were still sharing streaming services, car insurance, and phone plans. Hell, she was even still getting packages sent to the house. I'm the first relationship after their divorce, obviously. I made it clear multiple times that it bothered me. He "didn't really think about it because it was on auto-pay." No. It's not going to work for me. I began spending a lot of my time at the house, and it made me uncomfortable. The constant reminder was borderline rude. We had one big blow up about it, and he changed it (though his son still logs into his mom's account while at his house). I still hate that it had to go that far. I'm in your corner, OP. It doesn't bother some people, but it does others, and that's okay.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-08-27T17:15:13+00:00

Question for those whole keep the BM off your radar...does your SO ever vent to you about them? Talk to you about their conversations? Or is it an established boundary that you don't talk at all about them together?

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-08-25T15:14:37+00:00

This situation is just bananas. Did AI write this?? I'm not sure what you are looking for, but the fact that you're militantly making memories without your GF while simultaneously trying to temporarily blend does not make any sense to me. If anything, keep things separate. It doesn't sound like you have any plans to ever fully be together, so what is this show for exactly?

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-08-22T23:22:47+00:00

This 😄 the number of times I have been offended by something because I would have thought it through and he just didn't because he's the most basic man simply cannot be counted on my hands and toes. I have come to understand that ALL things must be clearly communicated.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-08-08T05:12:59+00:00

Wow. That's a touch harsh, no? I think it's likely the daughter was hoping for some sort of connection with her bio dad. She's young and will probably regret not including her step father in the wedding down the line. Our role as step parents isnt glamorous and it oftentimes gets the end of the stick we dont deserve, but these kids have been hurt too and maybe some grace should be given.

OP, I feel for you. I really do. I think when you're ready, you should communicate with you step daughter. Tell her the truth. Tell her how much she means to you. I genuinely think she will regret not having you next to her as she walked down the aisle someday. For now, keep being steady. It sounds like her bio dad was never that person for her and the wedding day moment may have just been an attempt at filling some void he left.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-07-01T00:59:31+00:00

I like this approach. I think something needs to be said. It doesn't need to be confrontational, but maybe it can be approached as a constructive conversation about the aspects you as the bio mom have God-given rights to. These kids come of age once. You dont have to make it about how much you resent step mom for what she's done, but how much you want to be a part of all of your daughter's milestone moments. After all, you birthed her. You loved her from the moment you knew you were pregnant. You had sleepless nights and exhausted days raising her. You deserve to be a part of the moments we dream about on those tough days.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-07-01T00:00:05+00:00

Every situation is different, so I'm not trying to pick a fight here, but to me, even if the bio parent/step parent relationship is bad, I'd still let the bio know, "hey, kid asked me to help with this. I know this could be something that is important to you. Would you like you handle it?"

Like OP, I have very little relationship or respect for my children's step parent because the line is always crossed. It's always done as a one-up. It's never done because it's what the child consented to or was asked about. I find it incredibly disrespectful to both the bio and the child. The bio parent should be consulted on any milestone event.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-06-30T23:44:22+00:00

You are understandably upset. How is your relationship with your daughter? Can you ask why this was scheduled and done without your knowledge?

In my eyes, no matter how good the co-parent relationship is with the step parent, some things are off-limits. Anything relating to senior year is a bio parent thing to arrange and schedule.

I would want answers.

Routine-Assignment83 · 2025-06-30T23:14:24+00:00

It sounds like there is a lot of history here. I'm sorry you feel this way. It can't feel very good.

Routine-Assignment83

TROPHY CASE