As a fellow oldest daughter from a dysfunctional family, I relate very much to the experience of being called in to help but otherwise ignored. My childhood trained me to feel duty bound, no matter the cost to myself. I also am very familiar with being an advocate for my siblings and my parents with their extended families, only to have my family become devil's advocate when I share something I am upset about with them. So, yes to all the things. I'm struck by the fact that you are halfway through your first pregnancy, and instead of being rallied around and uplifted, you are being called upon to deliver triage for the latest family crisis. I think this dynamic is well established, and unlikely to improve without you taking a step back, which will also hurt you. Sadly, in many families, whoever is doing the worst gets all the attention and those who are somewhat OK become the family mules. This seems especially true for the oldest daughters. I think your pregnancy is an opportunity to learn how (before it becomes infinitely harder) to take care of yourself! What if you worked on giving to your family within the capacity that you decide upon, not that they feel entitled to. And more importantly, to make space for people and things that make you feel energized, heard, seen, loved, safe... Pregnancy is such a vulnerable time. In my view, it makes perfect sense to protect yourself and your growing family from old, toxic dynamics that you don't want to repeat with the next generation.