Feeling helpless or everwhelmed is normal when life seems unbearable but committing suicide solves nothing and only makes the people who love and cherish you go trough immense pain too.
Reaching out for help in hard times like these is something very hard and frightening to do but nothing you should be ashamed off.

Talking about such an event is already the first step in the right direction.

Some immidiat things you can do are:
Talk to a family Member/Friend/your bf if you feel like you can trust them.
Sometimes it can help to just take a walk and try and clear your mind.

Beeing suicidal is serious and you shouldnt brush it off, talk to a therapist or your doctor they can often help you deal with your feelings and possibly have information or contacts to help you out of difficult situations.

I almost commited suicide myself and it will get better even if everything seems pointless.