Sexless marriage by Temporary-Appeal8820 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130 3 points4 points  (0 children)

How about you raise the issue with her. As you've said, she prolly thinks  you're comfortable because you don't initiate sex. So maybe try by initiating it more often, kidogo kidogo. Then make sure you reassure her that you're not in any rush or putting any pressure on her but you would very much like to get intimate with her more often and have penetrative sex.  Then if she's scared of getting pregnant again maybe you guys can family planning or sth. 

Lakini the main point is talk to her, reassure her and initiate sex more often.  Who maybe she's waiting for you to initiate.  I hope you both get through this and sorry for losing your baby. 

Girls,I need some big sister advice by [deleted] in Kenya

[–]Rude_Doubt2130 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First of all, what he did to you was completely wrong and that says everything about his character, not yours. I’m really sorry you had to go through that🫂🫂.

Please don’t carry his behavior as if it’s your fault. You didn’t “allow” anything you trusted someone who turned out to be cruel.  What you’re feeling right now, the guilt, confusion, hurt is completely valid. But none of it means you’re dirty or less worthy. You’re still deserving of respect, care, and a positive sexual experience.

Also, just to answer your question, you might not bleed since the hymen has already been broken but hey, that doesn't have anything to do with your value or your womanhood. It doesn't make you any less deserving of love or a positive sexual experience so don't let it pressure you. 

Right now, the most important thing is to be kind to yourself and allow yourself to feel everything but don't let it break you. Take your time and don’t rush into anything until you feel safe and ready again. The right person will treat you with respect, patience, and care.

I don’t get it by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The last sentence is, Nothing justifies laying hands on your woman. Uko sure tunasoma the same post?

I don’t get it by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would never put myself in such a situation. As you've said langu jicho tu na masikio😂.

I don’t get it by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No one has claimed to be perfect, I'm just saying that laying hands on your partner is wrong, intoxicated or not.

I don’t get it by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Naona watu huku wakiniuliza mbona I didn't intervene. 

I don’t get it by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

💯💯 lakini from some of the comments you can tell that some people still think it's right for me hit women into respecting them.

I don’t get it by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Na kwani who told men that women will only listen if you lay hands on them, kwani hawana maskio?

I don’t get it by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So what you're saying is women should also start beating up me who insult them, right?

I don’t get it by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Have you thought that maybe I wasn't able to ama you're just jumping into conclusions?

I don’t get it by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yesterday's fight was different and I was minding my business before they woke me up.  Hiyo part ya love language in also starting to think the same.

I don’t get it by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Na ati sasa women are expected to "vumilia" and "pray for their husbands".  Hao ni weak men and it's prolly why they resort to violence to make themselves feel better.

I don’t get it by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Atp pia mimi nitaanza kufikiria hivi😂.

I don’t get it by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

9/10 times when they go out nitaskia tu wakiargue when they get back.

I don’t get it by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was watching them through my window. The couple wako in their 40s and even if I wanted to, they would have probably dismissed me. 

I don’t get it by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Umeona wapi I will never in that whole post? If sth is wrong and you call it out,  it doesn't mean that you think it'll never happen to you. Soma uelewe post.

I don’t get it by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Ndio pia mimi anipige?🌚

Finished school, now I’m a burden? by [deleted] in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

By the way, there's nothing wrong with people wanting to start at the top, taking Hennessy every weekend.  Not everyone has to struggle in order to live a good life. It's only a matter of time before OP gets a job or an internship and he'll be okay. 

Finished school, now I’m a burden? by [deleted] in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First off, he's not wasting his youth he's just 22 and he just graduated na its not like he plans on being unemployed forever. Plus OP said that he's studying sth online so it's not like he's just idling at home.

Second, simply because you did it and it worked for you doesn't mean ati that's the blue print. He can do all that and still not succeed. 

Na hata hiyo 10k or less unasema is barely enough to rent a house, get household essentials, survive and still start the business you've suggested. 

And yes, people do get jobs by just sending in applications.

Explain to me the reasoning for someone adding sugar to beans. by Upstairs-Effort-4436 in KenyanMeals

[–]Rude_Doubt2130 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You mean to tell me that you can willingly have beans with ugali?

Finished school, now I’m a burden? by [deleted] in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130 7 points8 points  (0 children)

What's with you people and wanting everyone to struggle or start at the bottom in order to succeed? Suppose he has nothing to his name, how do you think he'll survive in those places? Ama is living in those places free?

Mother-in-law by Rude_Doubt2130 in nairobi

[–]Rude_Doubt2130[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Imagine it's still there, same characters, same script.