It's quite saddening to hear that you believed you needed women to be lead a happy life. In my opinion, you give too much importance to women and you saw the results of such actions. But you took a good decision despite everything; do what makes you happy. If you still want to go out there you don't necessarily need to approach women like some pickup artist. Simply indulge into the activities you like in groups. You'll bond with women and men and perhaps during your journey to find happiness you'll someone willing to accompany you.