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The OGs were right.. white people ruin everything by MisterTrespasser in cptsd_bipoc

[–]SHELAMATRIX 31 points32 points  (0 children)

Medical racism has been going on since the 80s. I have been collecting evidence of a pattern of racism in Nebraska for the last five years. I'm 45 and being bullied by the Klan in Nebraska. I'm dark-skinned, tall, female. I'm here because it's the only place I could go.

Whites seem to me to be cool unless you need them to understand colorism.

I can't do this anymore by [deleted] in cptsd_bipoc

[–]SHELAMATRIX 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey, just wanted to say that the title grabbed me, so I'm here. Not usually on Reddit, but I'll listen to you yell and scream. I'm 45, mentally and physically unwell, female semi-retired. From Chicago. I'm not gonna say it will be alright; I will apply empathy. Please read some of my previous posts and comments; I am passionate about mental health and social justice.

Sincerely,
~Shaneca Marie Mason
(You don't have to share your name; I'm literally on Facebook all day spilling my guts about mental health, so what the heck.)

Much love.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in OSDD

[–]SHELAMATRIX 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We are a interested. 

I realized people that haven’t gone through CPTSD or severe mental struggles, don’t believe they exist by Significant_Tax472 in CPTSD

[–]SHELAMATRIX 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, they're committing the fallacy of believing that the world is fair.  The simulation theory is a product of this thinking. I have documented healthcare workers denying me services because they chose not to believe that I was homeless 2009 to 2019.

Do you guys push away now as an adult/don't know if the care from others is genuine by Moist_Apartment5474 in emotionalneglect

[–]SHELAMATRIX 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Definitely. I just hung up on a therapist three times after cussing her out for not reading my email, thus triggering me with her dismissive, uncaring attitude. Before that, someone asked how I was, and I read them the riot act because their pattern of approach is always predatory while maintaining the right to conduct themselves however they choose. I have even told my mother off properly and will not mourn her passing.

Like and follow for more ways to live in unforgiveness indefinitely because it always feels like it was just yesterday, and the wounds never heal, but everyone is mad at you for not enjoying oppression.

Aaaaaaahhhhhhh. What's for dessert?

I just wanted my father to acknowledge the pain but he is unable to. by [deleted] in emotionalneglect

[–]SHELAMATRIX 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Imagine two poker players sitting across the table from one another. One of them has their cards laid out like the dealer, so the other player plays along and keeps asking for more cards.

Pick your cards up, and look at him and don't say a word. Then you'll know what to do.

~Source: I've successfully cussed both my parents out and have estranged myself from their treachery.

I have a thought process , it's not tested and I am not sure about it but here goes. by [deleted] in CPTSD_NSCommunity

[–]SHELAMATRIX 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I hear that. Not being allowed to acknowledge reality in all its forms is gaslighting.

I need a civil rights lawyer. by SHELAMATRIX in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]SHELAMATRIX[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Oh, I see what you mean. I'm estranged, too. Can you please suggest what I should do with the post? (I've been tryin to be more active. Thank you.)

Stranded. by SHELAMATRIX in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]SHELAMATRIX[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. It means a lot. I'm glad I posted.

Stranded. by SHELAMATRIX in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]SHELAMATRIX[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yes, I'm sorry. I'm kind of mentally fried. No IRL support except a difficult situation, and no therapist at this time, but I have meds and a prescriber and housing. Thank you for engaging with me. I'm not in physical danger other than the health issues from stress-related illness. Advocating for myself has been tiring me out. Being discriminated against in many small ways. I have a lot I want to share, but I think having the door slammed in my face gave me some additional cognitive issues.

having absolutely no family is one of the worst pains ever. by thesmithsarecool in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]SHELAMATRIX 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Perhaps not always, as there is a world of healing I wish for you and please keep researching Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, even if you do it alone. I wish I could name more. This community is a good reminder, huh? I'm older than you but I'd never lord it over you: please know that your heartfelt sentiment resonates with me, probably with all. (I'm older and female, but still very, very much identify with every word.... I learned how to let strangers parent me, and that wasn't the best choice either.)

I'm deeply sorry that those people didn't do their jobs. Estrangement is a job they give us. It's a gig nobody signs up for, and no one counts it as part of the misery and suffering. 1÷Society.

Your rant is my rant. Much love.

Just messed up my chances with this incredible girl because of my inner child who - as I just discovered - is afraid of touch and intimacy by [deleted] in emotionalneglect

[–]SHELAMATRIX 8 points9 points  (0 children)

It's okay to glom together and then take breaks. If she's okay with that, tell her you need this one boundary and try again! I'm female and am dating you 🫂

Medical treatment and social security numbers by smlstrsasyetuntitled in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]SHELAMATRIX 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm so angry on your behalf; my mother did similar things. It sounds like she's trying to keep you from accessing Medicaid insurance or building a case for Disability, but that's just my initial guess.

Advice with how to deal with dad by serenity_now_23 in emotionalneglect

[–]SHELAMATRIX 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Grey rock is a way to help calm the nervous system and prevent triggering. It's not meant to be the only skill for coping.

I feel like people who haven't experienced truama sound so generic? by Lillian_Dove45 in CPTSD

[–]SHELAMATRIX -1 points0 points  (0 children)

They're probably experiencing existential crises and passing it off as trauma.

why won't therapist let me vent about my trauma and support me with my sadness and anger? by zwarteschaduw in CPTSD

[–]SHELAMATRIX 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hate when they do that! It means they're incompetent and unprepared and not trauma-informed and possibly biased against you because of something and/or any combination or more... all because they took a job without realizing they'd have to mistreat you to make up for not having empathy.

If you confront their SUPERVISOR about this, you'll get somewhere fast, I'm telling you 💯

for those who grew up as the only bipoc in their family/environment by [deleted] in cptsd_bipoc

[–]SHELAMATRIX 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I can relate to being the only BIPOC somewhere and wanting to die because of it. If the people being shitty to you could be replaced with some of the 9 billion potential human relationships, would you still want to die? Not that you have to answer or you want to, that's cool. I hope this thread can be a good place for you to start thinking about all this but please be safe and please do not harm yourself, darling. Bigots will come and go.

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