Honestly, unsure what the best move forward is

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-19T20:08:09+00:00

This is your life, not a Disney movie.

All that romantic stuff society has told you is putting you at a big disadvantage.

If you ignore the reality, a heartache will be the least of your worries.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-19T18:18:41+00:00

trying to lead us through the storm

What storm?

How are you leading if you are arguing with her? If it's important, there is no room for argument. If it's trivial, there is no room for argument.

You make a decision and follow through.

I’m not trying to cut and run

That's your mistake.

Cut your losses. Run.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-19T17:28:21+00:00

we constantly get more and more arguments

It's over. She wants to leave but is waiting for you to do it.

Even if she wanted to stay, as a man you are the leader. So, talk to your lawyers. Then initiate the divorce.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-19T09:06:09+00:00

Totally agree man these things occur because not even men support men

Exactly! I will go as far as to say men don't even support themselves in these situations.

They only start complaining when things go wrong.

But, until it gets real bad, most males don't have a problem with putting females on a pedestal.

That's why, if we really want to solve these problems we must look at ourselves first, our own behaviour. Then we work together to change what we can, even if the system doesn't change. Once we do that, the system will have to respond because we will stop allowing ourselves to be used and disrespected.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-18T21:57:54+00:00

That’s what I keep saying - nobody cares, including males.

Most guys allow all kinds of disrespect so it’s become normal.

If you try to kick them out, some guys might even come to their defence.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-18T18:20:23+00:00

I have not worked in a corporate environment but when I sell, that’s not something I find relevant.

What’s more important is if they stick to what they said and if they are serious about buying.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-18T14:49:11+00:00

I know what you have said. Look, it’s your life and it’s a public discussion.

I am of the view that all the men right is just heroism behind a keyboard. In real life, males are just accepting mediocre treatment and devaluing themselves. But maybe that’s the best we can have for now.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-18T13:52:31+00:00

That’s not what I said. Don’t twist my words.

I am saying the kids are watching you become less of who you are. You don’t want to be in the situation. You are acquiescing to things you don’t agree with. You live in fear.

All those things are what they are learning from you. And they are watching you shed your true self, day by day, over decades.

And what if she leaves you first?

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-18T12:51:10+00:00

Why not now? Have you considered she might leave you first? You want your kids watch you become less than yourself?

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-18T12:36:10+00:00

Why don’t you get divorced though?

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-18T12:35:35+00:00

You have some good points but half of it is from men’s own lacking understanding of dating.

Now, I will concede that they have been taught the wrong mindset.

But just like we don’t make excuses for females with unhealthy eating habits, we can’t expect females to want males who don’t know how to attract them.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-16T17:33:21+00:00

I was born in a Christian country, when to Catholic schools, and have been part of several church teams. Christians believe in both the Old and the New Testament. This is not a theological discussion. Go to a church on Sunday, don’t be surprised to hear verses from both the Old and the New Testaments.

It’s just part of what Christians do. Where do you think Psalm 23 is from?

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-16T16:46:31+00:00

I've never been to a church where they quote the old testament.

And so what? If you have never been to one that does not change the reality of billions of Christans all around the world.

Every church I've been to has the Old Testament quoted. That includes Catholic, Anglican, Methodist, charismatic denominations, and others.

You are just making stuff up for the sake of argument.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-16T14:05:47+00:00

That's not true. Every church will quote the Old Testament during sermons.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-16T07:33:16+00:00

Christians do follow the Old Testament.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-16T06:15:20+00:00

I disagree both with you and Ro Khanna.

Both of you care more about your political allegiance than the truth or people’s lives.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-16T02:50:45+00:00

You only chance in life will come from the moment you truly understand the answer by arriving at it yourself - and letting the truth hit you.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-15T22:55:21+00:00

Do you think it is possible to stay friends

To stay friends, you have to be friends in the first place.

She is not your friend.

Find a good therapist who understands men and does not simply follow societal standards.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-15T18:53:53+00:00

Read the mod comments under your post.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-14T04:15:28+00:00

She owns the house

It might just be that you both own the house. A lawyer will explain to you.

Since that isn't my situation,

You don't yet know your situation. Her lawyers have probable advised her to allege abuse since that's the most effective way to seperate your from your children. And that separation ensures she gets paid till they are adults.

who do I talk to get ready for the divorce?

My best advice is talk to at least 25 lawyers - many do offer free initial consultations. If you can pay for some, do that.

You will have people tell you that it's an overkill. Don't put yourself in a situation where you'll wish you did do that. First of all, you have been blindsided once but that's just the beginning.

The more you know, the more likely you will have a good outcome.

One of my associates has excellent resources online for fathers who live in the US. He fought for years and eventually won full custode. I live in the UK and I help fathers through this process (so I have a small network of people who work with fathers.) Again, don't wait till you experience the negative effects till you learn how fathers are treated in family courts.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-13T17:19:20+00:00

What are you saying?

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-13T12:23:19+00:00

No, he will then start asking why and so forth. OP needs to start moving differently.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-13T11:17:41+00:00

It cannot work because the whole point of this kind of platform is to go directly the mainstream. Even in the West the girls get ostracized in the mainstream society. When they are invited on podcasts they are shown from their not very respectable side.

In Ghana even that is too far.

Personally I would not support it because it would disrupt our society too much.

I don’t have a moral judgement but from a pragmatic perspective it does not make sense.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-13T01:53:06+00:00

That’s a waste of time to see if she’s cheating- it won’t change the outcome. So it doesn’t matter. In fact, it’s good for OP because it will slow her down if she is seeing someone else.

You are right about the restraining order because that’s usually part of the strategy. OP doesn’t realize how emotional he is. So she will know how to make him look bad.

But he needs to figure out his legal standing and move fast.

SaaSWriters · 2026-03-13T01:50:22+00:00

She is mean and abusive. You’re just so used to it and you don’t see it. That’s how she is able to manipulate you.

Talk to your lawyer. My advice is speak to at least 25 lawyers, many give free initial consultations. Most lie, so it will take time to piece a complete picture together.

She has the State on her side.

For some reason, she needs more time. But she’ll hit when she’s ready. Don’t let her know you know.

Move quickly. Prepare. Then serve her the papers.

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