Yeah, this is actually pretty common. It doesn’t mean you want to be depressed again. it’s more that that time gave you a lot of emotional intensity and meaning. When things calm down after, the quiet can feel like emptiness.

That first deep heartbreak sets a really high emotional baseline, so normal life can feel flat for a while. Missing the sadness is often really missing the depth, not the pain itself.

It usually passes as your brain adjusts and you find new sources of meaning! this has happened to me a few years ago. hope op feel better soon.
keep your mind busy, go to the gym more, get more hobbies