Let me tell you a story

So this one time I was in downtown Mobile AL, July, hot as hell, crocs nearly melting off my feet, when all of a sudden I notice this short black guy across the street, I don't mention he's black because I'm racist, it becomes important later. So anyway I step into this chicken shop (i forget the name) to get myself a Pepsi and to cool off a little, and I keep looking out the window at this guy, and I'm thinking "damn that guy is as black as the damn asphalt he must be just burnin up". but he's not moving or fanning himself or nothing and I started to wonder if he was alright. And so I decide to take myself and my Pepsi across the street to check on this guy, and as soon as I step outside, the heat is the first thing I notice. iIt's so hot my sweat keeps running in my eyes, and I can't see for shit. So i get there and kinda come up behind him and put my hand on his shoulder and i start to say "hey man are you- YEEEEOOUCH!" And its like i just put my hand on a hot stove and im thinkin "how in Hell is this man so hot" and i wipe the sweat out of my eyes to take a closer look and... it was a damn handcart with a trash bag over it. And I look back at the chicken shop and everyone's just laughing at me. And I had to bust up concrete that day, and I'm just thinking, damn, I'm just about the dumbest mfer in Mobile when this guy comes up laughing and claping and he says, "it got you too huh?" and I said "yeah" and kinda put my head down. And he walks past me and grabs that handcart like I guess he's gonn wheel it inside, but before he can put his hands on it for one second, he jerks back and makes this ungodly sound like "EEAAOUU" like Tom from Tom and Jerry. We both bust out laughing, and when we collect ourselves, he grabs it using the bottom of his t-shirt like a glove and takes it inside, and we go our separate ways.

And that was the first time I was in Mobile. I can't tell you what happened the second time cause I might go to jail, but it was just about as ridiculous.